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presents for bad kids?

Posted by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:44 AM
  • 16 Replies

 if your kids are bad, and i mean BAD, do you still get them presents?

im talking about little ones that like to throw the typical tantrums.

im talking about the ones that are old enough to know better (pre teen) and still pull stupid shit. MAJOR stupid shit......that could get ppl in big trouble.

by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:44 AM
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Replies (1-10):
ErikaRobin
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:45 AM
2 moms liked this

Yes.

We don't use holidays to discipline.

You can still have a good holiday and serve an appropriate consequence.

jillbailey26
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:46 AM
1 mom liked this

I'd still buy presents.  Now, whether or not they got to play with those presents is a different story.  

I refuse to use Christmas as a tool for good behavior, but other rules will apply.  If you don't behave, things get removed (games, tv, toys, etc).  This would include the brand new Christmas toys.


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19

alwayskk
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:47 AM

I would not be buying them the super expensive, super cool presents that they've been wanting all year. I would still get them stuff.

harpsichord
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:48 AM

yes

ErikaRobin
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:48 AM
1 mom liked this

It drives me nuts when people resort to "taking away a holiday" from a kid.  There are plenty of other opportunities to make our point more effectively.


It also can be interpreted by the child/teen that mom and dad's love is conditional.  Everyone else is getting presents and love bestowed on them at the holidays, but them.  Because they were bad.  So now they are not loved anymore. 

It's a slippery slope to therapy, in my opinion.



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MWV85
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:48 AM

 thats what i was thinking too.

Quoting alwayskk:

I would not be buying them the super expensive, super cool presents that they've been wanting all year. I would still get them stuff.

 

Lizardannie1966
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:48 AM
1 mom liked this

Always gave them their presents anyway.

By refusing to give them Christmas presents, I think some parents believe this will be a miracle cure that will somehow change and enlighten the child to change.

Generally doesn't seem to work that way. One day isn't going to change it.

If there are problems like tantrum throwing or disrespectful teens, there are more productive ways of working with the problems than taking away their Christmas presents.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:49 AM

Christmas...or whatever holiday you celebrate should never be used as a punishment. They can still have the holiday, but the holidays are meant to be shared with family, not hanging out with friends all the time. They can still be a part of the family gatherings and a part of gift giving and receiving, they just won't be allowed anything outside of the family plans. That's how we'll be handling it, should the situation ever arise.

jillbailey26
by on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:49 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting ErikaRobin:

It drives me nuts when people resort to "taking away a holiday" from a kid.  There are plenty of other opportunities to make our point more effectively.



I agree.  I think I'd even let them play with their new stuff on Christmas day.  Get a nice feel for it.  Then the day after, it's business as usual.


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19

Maks1mommy
by Emerald Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 8:51 AM
My dd is to young to be deliberately evil or understand that she isn't getting gifts because of something she did a week ago.
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