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I think my dh likes someone else UPDATE!!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Everyday when he gets home it's j did this and j said that!! And it's all day and all night. She's all I hear about. And anytime he has a problem he goes to her!! Wtf? They've only been working together for maybe three months.











**I have talked to him. He tells me I'm just being jealous that he only talks to her because he works with her. But he doesn't talk about his other coworkers nearly as much not even the ones he works closely with. I can't do anything without him bringing her up. I don't think he's cheating but I do think he likes her and I don't know what to do. He can't change his hours or anything like that. And I can't make him quit lol. So idk.**





*** Thank you ladies for all of your advice. I will try to talk to him again and see his reaction and try to get him to understand why I am so uncomfortable. I will also make sure I meet her. Thanks again for all of your advice***



**** I went to dh's work today for his lunch break but I didn't get to meet her until right before I left. She was kinda pretty but didn't look anything like me. I'm having dh invite her over for dinner one night so I can actually meet her. I also talked to him again last night. He said his usual she's just someone I work with. So I guess we'll see what happens.****
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 4, 2012 at 2:53 PM
Replies (111-120):
simberella
by Bronze Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:00 PM
I talk about my friend Ryan to my boyfriend all the time. We spend a lot of time together that's the only reason. I swear I would rather vomit than sleep with him... It could be nothing
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 13 on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:00 PM

That's what I'm saying, you got it girl! Do it. It's one of the only things sometimes that you can do is give it right back to him. That will more than likely open his eyes. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I could make one up lol. That's about all I could do.

Quoting Anonymous:

When you meet her tomorrow, see if she reminds you of yourself. Maybe she reminds him of you and it's easy for him to talk to her. If worse comes to worse and he won't listen to you is there any way you could "meet" a man to start talking about all the time?

Quoting Anonymous:

Like 2-4 years older than us I think.



Quoting Anonymous:

Then that is weird. Do you know how old this woman is? 

Quoting Anonymous:

He has a brother. He's never been one to talk to girls. I was the one who started talking to him when we first got together. He has always been friends with men.





Quoting Anonymous:

My dh used to do that, he just felt more comfortable talking to women. It took him a while to realize that it wasn't appropriate. He doesn't do it anymore, at all. Granted he isn't working in the same place anymore, but I just want you to know just because he's doing this doesn't mean he likes her like that. Does he have any brothers or just sisters? My dh only has a sister, which I've learned, made him more comfortable around females than it did males. 




Elayna90
by Gold Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:00 PM
In a way, I agree with this. It doesn't mean there is anything going on. Maybe they just clicked. Does he try to hang out with her outside of work without you?

And as conpletely contradictory as this will sound, still keep your eyes open. Meet her. Try to become friends with her. But make it clear to her and him that their friendship is a work thing. And you are not ok with it being more.
And have a serious talk with him. Tell him that even though he says it is nothing, it makes you uncomfortable that he is so close to another female since that is not the normal for you guys. Don't try to end the friendship. Just tell him you don't like the closeness and the way he talks to her.


Quoting dee1603:

It's very common.



When I worked at a corp everyone had a work husband or work wife.



Relax. Seriously. Invite her over.




Quoting Anonymous:

Work wife? I think not. He only needs one wife. Me.





Quoting dee1603:

It's his work wife. Invite her over for dinner.







Work wives make the best bff's to home wives.
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RunningMommaof2
by Kelly on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:02 PM
I think my dh had a crush on a girl at work. He had a nickname for her and everything. I told him that it was inappropriate for a married man to have a nick name for another woman. He eventually stopped talking to her, but when he did she got really pissed and tried to get him in trouble... For work related issues. I think he deserved it. It's normal to have little crushes on people, but not to act on them. It's best to stay professional in professional environments.
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dee1603
by Gold Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:02 PM
Sorry didn't mean to hit anon.

Good luck. Hopefully she is awesome and you can grow to be friends and not worry.


Quoting Anonymous:

Ok. I'll talk to him tonight and tell him once dd is better I'd like for her to come over for dinner.



Quoting Anonymous:

Yes I do.





You have no way of knowing if you're overreacting until you meet her for yourself. Who knows. She might be a great person!!





If your husband is cheating you will know within seconds of her coming over. Plus, if he has something to hide, he won't let her.





Quoting Anonymous:

Do you really think that would be a good idea?







Quoting dee1603:

It's very common.









When I worked at a corp everyone had a work husband or work wife.









Relax. Seriously. Invite her over.










Quoting Anonymous:

Work wife? I think not. He only needs one wife. Me.











Quoting dee1603:

It's his work wife. Invite her over for dinner.













Work wives make the best bff's to home wives.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:02 PM
Wouldn't that be lying though? I have a super conscious lol. I'm not a good liar.

Quoting Anonymous:

That's what I'm saying, you got it girl! Do it. It's one of the only things sometimes that you can do is give it right back to him. That will more than likely open his eyes. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I could make one up lol. That's about all I could do.



Quoting Anonymous:

When you meet her tomorrow, see if she reminds you of yourself. Maybe she reminds him of you and it's easy for him to talk to her. If worse comes to worse and he won't listen to you is there any way you could "meet" a man to start talking about all the time?

Quoting Anonymous:

Like 2-4 years older than us I think.





Quoting Anonymous:

Then that is weird. Do you know how old this woman is? 

Quoting Anonymous:

He has a brother. He's never been one to talk to girls. I was the one who started talking to him when we first got together. He has always been friends with men.







Quoting Anonymous:

My dh used to do that, he just felt more comfortable talking to women. It took him a while to realize that it wasn't appropriate. He doesn't do it anymore, at all. Granted he isn't working in the same place anymore, but I just want you to know just because he's doing this doesn't mean he likes her like that. Does he have any brothers or just sisters? My dh only has a sister, which I've learned, made him more comfortable around females than it did males. 




Anonymous
by Anonymous 13 on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:06 PM

Nope, not lying. You can't think of it like that. Think of it like this, it's either you show him what this feels like and nip it in the bud right now or he may end up cheating on you. Could you imagine what you would have to go through? Now, I'm not saying that's why he's talking to or about this girl but it's a possibility. If you start talking about another man and how great he is it'll reel him back in to you. He'll wonder to himself, the same things you are wondering right now. It'll make him realize, maybe I shouldn't talk to this girl anymore, I don't want her to talk to this other man. If I were you, I would do it. If you want his interest to be back towards you and only you this is one of your best options. As you've already learned if you bring up the issue he calls you jealous, why not make him jealous and see how it likes it? 

You can do it girl! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Wouldn't that be lying though? I have a super conscious lol. I'm not a good liar.

Quoting Anonymous:

That's what I'm saying, you got it girl! Do it. It's one of the only things sometimes that you can do is give it right back to him. That will more than likely open his eyes. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I could make one up lol. That's about all I could do.



Quoting Anonymous:

When you meet her tomorrow, see if she reminds you of yourself. Maybe she reminds him of you and it's easy for him to talk to her. If worse comes to worse and he won't listen to you is there any way you could "meet" a man to start talking about all the time?

Quoting Anonymous:

Like 2-4 years older than us I think.





Quoting Anonymous:

Then that is weird. Do you know how old this woman is? 

Quoting Anonymous:

He has a brother. He's never been one to talk to girls. I was the one who started talking to him when we first got together. He has always been friends with men.







Quoting Anonymous:

My dh used to do that, he just felt more comfortable talking to women. It took him a while to realize that it wasn't appropriate. He doesn't do it anymore, at all. Granted he isn't working in the same place anymore, but I just want you to know just because he's doing this doesn't mean he likes her like that. Does he have any brothers or just sisters? My dh only has a sister, which I've learned, made him more comfortable around females than it did males. 





Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:10 PM
I can try lol. It'd be just like telling someone about an imaginary friend as a kid. Well kind of the same. The only difference is he won't know he's non existent.

Quoting Anonymous:

Nope, not lying. You can't think of it like that. Think of it like this, it's either you show him what this feels like and nip it in the bud right now or he may end up cheating on you. Could you imagine what you would have to go through? Now, I'm not saying that's why he's talking to or about this girl but it's a possibility. If you start talking about another man and how great he is it'll reel him back in to you. He'll wonder to himself, the same things you are wondering right now. It'll make him realize, maybe I shouldn't talk to this girl anymore, I don't want her to talk to this other man. If I were you, I would do it. If you want his interest to be back towards you and only you this is one of your best options. As you've already learned if you bring up the issue he calls you jealous, why not make him jealous and see how it likes it? 

You can do it girl! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Wouldn't that be lying though? I have a super conscious lol. I'm not a good liar.



Quoting Anonymous:

That's what I'm saying, you got it girl! Do it. It's one of the only things sometimes that you can do is give it right back to him. That will more than likely open his eyes. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I could make one up lol. That's about all I could do.





Quoting Anonymous:

When you meet her tomorrow, see if she reminds you of yourself. Maybe she reminds him of you and it's easy for him to talk to her. If worse comes to worse and he won't listen to you is there any way you could "meet" a man to start talking about all the time?

Quoting Anonymous:

Like 2-4 years older than us I think.







Quoting Anonymous:

Then that is weird. Do you know how old this woman is? 

Quoting Anonymous:

He has a brother. He's never been one to talk to girls. I was the one who started talking to him when we first got together. He has always been friends with men.









Quoting Anonymous:

My dh used to do that, he just felt more comfortable talking to women. It took him a while to realize that it wasn't appropriate. He doesn't do it anymore, at all. Granted he isn't working in the same place anymore, but I just want you to know just because he's doing this doesn't mean he likes her like that. Does he have any brothers or just sisters? My dh only has a sister, which I've learned, made him more comfortable around females than it did males. 





Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:11 PM
Thank you :)

Quoting dee1603:

Sorry didn't mean to hit anon.



Good luck. Hopefully she is awesome and you can grow to be friends and not worry.




Quoting Anonymous:

Ok. I'll talk to him tonight and tell him once dd is better I'd like for her to come over for dinner.





Quoting Anonymous:

Yes I do.







You have no way of knowing if you're overreacting until you meet her for yourself. Who knows. She might be a great person!!







If your husband is cheating you will know within seconds of her coming over. Plus, if he has something to hide, he won't let her.







Quoting Anonymous:

Do you really think that would be a good idea?









Quoting dee1603:

It's very common.











When I worked at a corp everyone had a work husband or work wife.











Relax. Seriously. Invite her over.












Quoting Anonymous:

Work wife? I think not. He only needs one wife. Me.













Quoting dee1603:

It's his work wife. Invite her over for dinner.















Work wives make the best bff's to home wives.
LovelyMommy24
by Ruby Member on Dec. 4, 2012 at 4:13 PM

Exactly what I'm saying! I'm revealing who I am so you can PM me if you'd like a support system on this. :) 

Quoting Anonymous:

I can try lol. It'd be just like telling someone about an imaginary friend as a kid. Well kind of the same. The only difference is he won't know he's non existent.

Quoting Anonymous:

Nope, not lying. You can't think of it like that. Think of it like this, it's either you show him what this feels like and nip it in the bud right now or he may end up cheating on you. Could you imagine what you would have to go through? Now, I'm not saying that's why he's talking to or about this girl but it's a possibility. If you start talking about another man and how great he is it'll reel him back in to you. He'll wonder to himself, the same things you are wondering right now. It'll make him realize, maybe I shouldn't talk to this girl anymore, I don't want her to talk to this other man. If I were you, I would do it. If you want his interest to be back towards you and only you this is one of your best options. As you've already learned if you bring up the issue he calls you jealous, why not make him jealous and see how it likes it? 

You can do it girl! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Wouldn't that be lying though? I have a super conscious lol. I'm not a good liar.



Quoting Anonymous:

That's what I'm saying, you got it girl! Do it. It's one of the only things sometimes that you can do is give it right back to him. That will more than likely open his eyes. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I could make one up lol. That's about all I could do.





Quoting Anonymous:

When you meet her tomorrow, see if she reminds you of yourself. Maybe she reminds him of you and it's easy for him to talk to her. If worse comes to worse and he won't listen to you is there any way you could "meet" a man to start talking about all the time?

Quoting Anonymous:

Like 2-4 years older than us I think.







Quoting Anonymous:

Then that is weird. Do you know how old this woman is? 

Quoting Anonymous:

He has a brother. He's never been one to talk to girls. I was the one who started talking to him when we first got together. He has always been friends with men.









Quoting Anonymous:

My dh used to do that, he just felt more comfortable talking to women. It took him a while to realize that it wasn't appropriate. He doesn't do it anymore, at all. Granted he isn't working in the same place anymore, but I just want you to know just because he's doing this doesn't mean he likes her like that. Does he have any brothers or just sisters? My dh only has a sister, which I've learned, made him more comfortable around females than it did males. 






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