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DH never wants sex any more and it is really getting to me :(

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

To start off with I know he is not cheating...He goes to work and comes home...we have access to each others emails, passwords, cellphones ect..

DH would rather sit on the couch and stare at the damn TV then to be intimate with me :( I have tried to speak with him, I have tried to ask him for sex, I have tried to come on to him, I have bought lingerie and still he just doesn't seem interested..

It makes me feel undesired..I spend alot of nights on the couch crying because it just makes me feel like he is no longer interested in me...I have now gave up asking or trying to get him in the mood do to fear of rejection..I just no longer know what to do

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 5, 2012 at 10:02 AM
Replies (51-55):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 5, 2012 at 4:17 PM

nothing was different last time

Quoting Anonymous:

I'm sorry Hun :( if your trying and he's not interested I hardly think its you.. maybe he's going thru a hard time with something that he isn't ready to share with you, whether its out of embarrassment or he doesn't want to stress you out.. the last time you did have sex, did you dosomething different that you normally don't do? my dh went thru a time like what your describing.. come to find out, the last time we had sex I did something that triggered a bad memory for him and he was embarrassed to bring it up so he just put off sex. write him a letter or email explaining how you feel and maybe he'll come around and talk about his lack of interest. or just ask him if something is bothering him.


mandapanda82
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 4:19 PM
Same here!



Quoting dirby1988:

We are the opposite. He wants it all the time n i dont

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Jessica_Esqueda
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 4:22 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

How do deal with that? If you don't mind me asking why have you only had sex 3 times in 2.5 years?

Quoting Jessica_Esqueda:

We've only had sex 3 times in 2.5 years. I feel you. Keep doing what you're doing, and try to talk to him. There is probably something else going on.


Batteries!!! Lol! But really, keeping intimacy alive in other ways... sharing time together, cuddling up with a movie, etc. And also making sure he knows I still want him, even though he doesnt want me. I grab his butt a lot LOL! It's certainly hard to deal with... but keep communicating. A strong marriage WILL get through it. 

We suspect his testosterone may be low.. now low enough to treat, though, but lower than normal. Also, he has been depressed. Things are starting to look up, and I'm here again, hoping that our sex life is rejuvenated soon. 


The most important thing is making sure you BOTH show your love for each other in ways other than sex. The crappiness you're probably feeling (undesired? Ugly? Unwanted? Not sexy?) can usually be countered if you are intimate in other ways. 



For delicious allergy-friendly recipes, follow my blog, Cooking With Food Allergies! 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 5, 2012 at 4:26 PM


Quoting Jessica_Esqueda:


Quoting Anonymous:

How do deal with that? If you don't mind me asking why have you only had sex 3 times in 2.5 years?

Quoting Jessica_Esqueda:

We've only had sex 3 times in 2.5 years. I feel you. Keep doing what you're doing, and try to talk to him. There is probably something else going on.


Batteries!!! Lol! But really, keeping intimacy alive in other ways... sharing time together, cuddling up with a movie, etc. And also making sure he knows I still want him, even though he doesnt want me. I grab his butt a lot LOL! It's certainly hard to deal with... but keep communicating. A strong marriage WILL get through it. 

We suspect his testosterone may be low.. now low enough to treat, though, but lower than normal. Also, he has been depressed. Things are starting to look up, and I'm here again, hoping that our sex life is rejuvenated soon. 


The most important thing is making sure you BOTH show your love for each other in ways other than sex. The crappiness you're probably feeling (undesired? Ugly? Unwanted? Not sexy?) can usually be countered if you are intimate in other ways. 

Thanks for sharing with me :) I thinkthat is part of the issue he shows me no love, never complimates me, raley touches me...he is all words and no actions and yes I feel all of those :( but then if a friend of his says something nice to me and it makes me smile he gets upset wth

Jessica_Esqueda
by on Dec. 5, 2012 at 4:41 PM


Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Jessica_Esqueda:


Quoting Anonymous:

How do deal with that? If you don't mind me asking why have you only had sex 3 times in 2.5 years?

Quoting Jessica_Esqueda:

We've only had sex 3 times in 2.5 years. I feel you. Keep doing what you're doing, and try to talk to him. There is probably something else going on.


Batteries!!! Lol! But really, keeping intimacy alive in other ways... sharing time together, cuddling up with a movie, etc. And also making sure he knows I still want him, even though he doesnt want me. I grab his butt a lot LOL! It's certainly hard to deal with... but keep communicating. A strong marriage WILL get through it. 

We suspect his testosterone may be low.. now low enough to treat, though, but lower than normal. Also, he has been depressed. Things are starting to look up, and I'm here again, hoping that our sex life is rejuvenated soon. 


The most important thing is making sure you BOTH show your love for each other in ways other than sex. The crappiness you're probably feeling (undesired? Ugly? Unwanted? Not sexy?) can usually be countered if you are intimate in other ways. 

Thanks for sharing with me :) I thinkthat is part of the issue he shows me no love, never complimates me, raley touches me...he is all words and no actions and yes I feel all of those :( but then if a friend of his says something nice to me and it makes me smile he gets upset wth

And see, that's unhealthy. Even if he has no interest in sex, you need to feel loved. I would write him a letter... tell him you need to know he still cares for you, still finds you sexy, even if he doesn't want sex. He could also be depressed or having some other issues. Maybe you should look into a sexual therapist if it persists and he is unable to show you affection. 



For delicious allergy-friendly recipes, follow my blog, Cooking With Food Allergies! 

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