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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

DF wants me to return some of the gifts I got for my kids to buy for his

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

 

Poll

Question: What would you do?

Options:

Take back a few of your kid's gifts to buy his more

Just give his kids what you already have for them


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Total Votes: 414

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He got laid off 2 weeks ago, then his car needed work that cost a lot more then he had planned. On top of that, when they did the walk through for him to move out of his apartment, they are charging him for BS damage that was done before he even moved in. Basically, he is broke.

He was supposed to be getting a Christmas bonus from his work, instead they laid him off and the Christmas bonus was going to go to buying his kids presents. We are moving in together now but we decided that this would be the last Christmas we buy stuff for our kids separately. I have already gotten my kid's presents and a few things for his kids but he hasn't gotten anything for his kids.

Since there was a problem with my last paycheck (instead of putting 5% of it into my 401k and me getting the rest, they gave me a check for 5% and put the rest in my 401K) I don't have much extra money, espcially now knowing that I will be supporting all of us (well his kids while they are with us) on my paycheck alone until he can get a new job. Now, they will be fixing my pay check but it could take a little bit so in the meantime, I have enough to pay the bills and buy food.

DF said that since there is no money to buy his kids stuff, I should take back some of the stuff I got for my kids to buy his kids stuff. The way I see it 1. we agreed to do separately this year so it's not fair for him to expect me to do this 2. I did buy his kids a few things so it's not like they will have nothing 3. They will be getting stuff at their mom's house so it's not like that's all they are getting for Christmas (I am widowed so my kids don't have a dad's house to go to)

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:43 AM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:57 AM
1 mom liked this
That's a stupid suggestion.



Youre heavily taxed on it number one and I believe there is a waiting period before you get it. On top of taking it out for the purpose of Christmas gifts is silly.



Mama, I don't think its fair but the situation overall is crappy.

Even if its the last year you're supposed to do separate gifts, the point is you're all going to be a family. If the roles were reversed how would you feel if you hadn't bought your kids anything bc you lost your job and was stuck between a rock and a hard plqce?



It's a tough call. I understand how you feel and his stance on the situation.

Quoting svolkov:

I thin k u should borrow from your 401k
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mom_dl6
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:57 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

Maybe this is insensitive but it is not your responsibility and you shouldn't have to take from your kids for his. He should have planned better. And like you said, you already got his kids a few things, you didn't have to do that at all. I say just give them what you already have for them.


svolkov
by Emerald Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:57 AM
If u pay it make thru your checks within a certain timeframe there is no no penalty


Quoting Anonymous:



Quoting svolkov:

I thin k u should borrow from your 401k


Hell no, don't do that. You're financially strapped, you don't want to have to pay out penalties!


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MrsRobinson06
by Silver Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:57 AM
2 moms liked this
I wouldn't change a thing. He's known all year when Christmas is.
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brandyblx
by Silver Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:58 AM

 This

Quoting queencreekmom:

Nope. My kids would get their stuff. 


AdellesMom
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:58 AM
I agree.

Quoting Anonymous:

Maybe this is insensitive but it is not your responsibility and you shouldn't have to take from your kids for his. He should have planned better. And like you said, you already got his kids a few things, you didn't have to do that at all. I say just give them what you already have for them.
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svolkov
by Emerald Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:58 AM
Not if u pay it back within a certain amt of time.


Quoting Anonymous:

That's a stupid suggestion.



Youre heavily taxed on it number one and I believe there is a waiting period before you get it. On top of taking it out for the purpose of Christmas gifts is silly.



Mama, I don't think its fair but the situation overall is crappy.

Even if its the last year you're supposed to do separate gifts, the point is you're all going to be a family. If the roles were reversed how would you feel if you hadn't night your kids anything bc you lost your job?



It's a tough call. I understand how you feel and his stance on the situation.



Quoting svolkov:

I thin k u should borrow from your 401k

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:58 AM
2 moms liked this
Will they be there when yours opens gifts? If so it wouldbe rather shitty to not at least make the # semi even.
she_walk_softly
by on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:58 AM

Have him run up a credit card

monkeymom1104
by Silver Member on Dec. 8, 2012 at 12:59 AM
1 mom liked this
I agree with you. Since your kids don't have another parent to get gifts from. You may want to split your kids gifts and give them some when his kids are at their moms.
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