And everything he was saying was what I wanted to hear. But frankly im really nervous because I feel he's only saying these things because he knows I'm serious about divorce and he's just trying to butter me up and then going to go back to his normal self once divorce leaves the table.
Honestly, I'm tired of being the breadwinner in my marriage. That's not how I was raised to be. That's not how I envisioned my life to be growing up. And after my waiting for him for 5 years to make a change. I'm ready to just let it go, I do really care about him and dont want to be alone with two kids after being with someone for so long. But I need more, I need to be in love again. I need to feel like I want to go home after work and not hit a bar first or smoke a cig or two first. He has completely made me think about trying our marriage all over again. But I'm to afraid to invest anymore time in him and not get anything I deserve from him. I'm progressing in my life, in our marriage, and he has been doing just enough for it to look like he's doing SOMETHING. And he just made my decision, and mind-set a lot harder and I'm not sure what to think about any of this.