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)I have to leave (tired of the abuse(

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 42 Replies
I know I have too. But I have no proof that he has been abusive to me in the past because I never reported it. He convinced me that if I reported it, it would only hurt me. It would hurt our family. I was brainwashed. Now that he has been away for awhile, I relize I need to go. Now that he is home for a month, I relize how anxious and scared I am around him. I walk on eggs shells and try to make everything perfect. But I know, if one thing goes wrong. He is caoable of exploding. But I have no proof. I know he canbot handle visitation alone with our child. If we divorce this.can be bad. Atleast I can protect my child. But at the same time..i need to get our child away! And myself. I am scared to leave and scared to stay. I am in tears. I know what I have to do, but I am so scared. When he keaves I am going to find a support group like somebody suggested on here. I really need support. I am tired of living in fear. I am always scared. I am a sweet, caring person. I try to please everybody. I don't deserve to feel this way anymore. I just.want to run away. I don't even care where too. Just somewhere where it's just me and my baby. My husband thinks everything is okay. When I finally decide to tell him I want oit, I am sure he will think I am cheating or something and he will be so angry. I just want him to let me go. I just want to be free. I just want out so bad. I just want to peacefully be set free. I'm praying for God's angel's to protect me thru this decision. I just have to have Faith in him. I just want out!
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:39 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Traceyssel
by on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:41 PM
Wow
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:42 PM
Sorry for typo's. Just having an anxiety attack while thinking about leaving.
Amanda2487
by Member on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:45 PM
5 moms liked this
Quoting Anonymous:

Sorry for typo's. Just having an anxiety attack while thinking about leaving.

Want some advice? Do NOT tell him you're leaving. It'll make matters worse. Save as much money as you can as fast as you can. Make arrangements with somebody you TRUST and as soon as he leaves one day when you know he will be gone for an extended period call the person you trust pack as much as you can and leave and don't look back.
andreamarie
by Silver Member on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:46 PM
Mama. Where are you?
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:53 PM
He will be gone for 5 months. So I have time, but what about our child? I think it.will just piss him off more to up and leave with our child. I plan to go to a shelter. I have poa if his bank account and can take out money whenever I need too. I want to go to a shelter so he won't know where I am. I'm not really sure where we would go from there. I just don't know how all this is going to pan out. But I am going to leave. My husband leaves in about 3 weeks for 5 months. That is my oppurtunity.

Quoting Amanda2487:

Quoting Anonymous:

Sorry for typo's. Just having an anxiety attack while thinking about leaving.

Want some advice? Do NOT tell him you're leaving. It'll make matters worse. Save as much money as you can as fast as you can. Make arrangements with somebody you TRUST and as soon as he leaves one day when you know he will be gone for an extended period call the person you trust pack as much as you can and leave and don't look back.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:57 PM
This is what I had to do, I left state and filed from there. I had no proof of the abuse, only what a few friends had seen. When I filed they took my word for it, if he's that abusive chances are he will use the baby , nit not fight for it


Quoting Amanda2487:

Quoting Anonymous:

Sorry for typo's. Just having an anxiety attack while thinking about leaving.

Want some advice? Do NOT tell him you're leaving. It'll make matters worse. Save as much money as you can as fast as you can. Make arrangements with somebody you TRUST and as soon as he leaves one day when you know he will be gone for an extended period call the person you trust pack as much as you can and leave and don't look back.

Amanda2487
by Member on Dec. 10, 2012 at 11:59 PM
Quoting Anonymous:


Do you mind telling me where you live? If you don't want to publicly announce it feel free to PM me.
svolkov
by Emerald Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 12:00 AM

start seeing a counselor. do it asap. then you will have someone to back you up if needed. talk to a lawyer. i wa in the exact same position 6 yrs ago....i remember how aweome it was when my ex would be gone on a tdy. then later i remember thinking " i wish he would just get in an accident...then i can have my son and his life insurance" ...it was that thought that made me realize how bad it really was. i have never wished another person dead. i was horrified. call 211. pm me

svolkov
by Emerald Member on Dec. 11, 2012 at 12:02 AM

when he freaks out like yoiu think he will it will be obvious . it will get documented. trust me no matter how smooth he thinks he is trained professionals know what it looks like. its very common in abusers to do everything you are saying.

Quoting Anonymous:

He will be gone for 5 months. So I have time, but what about our child? I think it.will just piss him off more to up and leave with our child. I plan to go to a shelter. I have poa if his bank account and can take out money whenever I need too. I want to go to a shelter so he won't know where I am. I'm not really sure where we would go from there. I just don't know how all this is going to pan out. But I am going to leave. My husband leaves in about 3 weeks for 5 months. That is my oppurtunity.

Quoting Amanda2487:

Quoting Anonymous:

Sorry for typo's. Just having an anxiety attack while thinking about leaving.

Want some advice? Do NOT tell him you're leaving. It'll make matters worse. Save as much money as you can as fast as you can. Make arrangements with somebody you TRUST and as soon as he leaves one day when you know he will be gone for an extended period call the person you trust pack as much as you can and leave and don't look back.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 11, 2012 at 12:02 AM
5 years ago, one of my friend's heard him tell me that he would kill me over the phone. She heard him yelling and threatning me, and so did her dh. That's the only proof I really have. I haven't heard from her in along time. But she would always come get me when things got bad. I also have 2 other friends who know aboit the past verbal/physical abuse. Only because I have told them. They never witnessed it themselves though.

Quoting Anonymous:

This is what I had to do, I left state and filed from there. I had no proof of the abuse, only what a few friends had seen. When I filed they took my word for it, if he's that abusive chances are he will use the baby , nit not fight for it




Quoting Amanda2487:

Quoting Anonymous:

Sorry for typo's. Just having an anxiety attack while thinking about leaving.

Want some advice? Do NOT tell him you're leaving. It'll make matters worse. Save as much money as you can as fast as you can. Make arrangements with somebody you TRUST and as soon as he leaves one day when you know he will be gone for an extended period call the person you trust pack as much as you can and leave and don't look back.

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