I'm afraid I'll be turned off by him and am I selfish??
- 35 Replies
My husband is trying to lose 100 lbs, give or take. He is a pretty big guy, around 280, although years ago he was RIPPED. He is losing pretty rapidly, and I am concerned about several things.
First of all, I am worried that once he reaches his goal, he'll have loose, saggy skin from being overweight for so many years, and I'm worried that It will completely turn me off.
Second of all, I have never known him to be ripped, fit and so forth. I have seen pictures, and it doesn't even look like him. Part of what attracted me to him, in the first place, was how big he is, and I'm afraid he'll just look too much different than when I fell in love with him.
Thirdly, I am afraid that he'll lose all this weight, beef back up, and want a prettier girl because he's no longer overweight.
I'm horrible, right?
No. I'm pretty embarrassed to talk to him about it, and I don't want to hurt his feelings. He's doing this to become healthier for himself and us, so it doesn't seem right to bother him with petty feelings.
Quoting Arabellas_Mommy:
Not horrible, no. Have you talked to your DH about your concerns?
Quoting Anonymous:
Aaargh! It was a typo! He is currently around 280 or a bit more. His goal is around 185, and he's 5ft 9
Quoting BelleVernonGirl:
Your husband is 180lbs trying to loose 100 lbs? Da fuq?
You should edit your OP so people don't keep posting this.
My husband is my absolute world. However, I'm not naive enough to believe physical attraction doesn't matter one whit in a relationship.
Quoting StoneColdKiller:Sounds like you have low self esteem and not sure how much you love your husband.
If you love him, really any way he looks will not be a turn off, and if he loves you he will not want anyone but you.
I think its an understandable worry, but the journey to lose that much weight is so slow that I don't think you're going to wake up one day and say, "Oh, I'm not attracted to you anymore." It'll be a metamorphosis and you'll probably be just as attracted to him as you always were.
I have been married for 12 years, both me and my husband have gone up and down and havent always looked good, atleast for us (and I would image for a lot of people) physical attraction ends once you really are in love with the person.
Quoting Anonymous:
My husband is my absolute world. However, I'm not naive enough to believe physical attraction doesn't matter one whit in a relationship.
Quoting StoneColdKiller:
Sounds like you have low self esteem and not sure how much you love your husband.
If you love him, really any way he looks will not be a turn off, and if he loves you he will not want anyone but you.
Quoting StoneColdKiller:I have been married for 12 years, both me and my husband have gone up and down and havent always looked good, atleast for us (and I would image for a lot of people) physical attraction ends once you really are in love with the person.
Quoting Anonymous:
My husband is my absolute world. However, I'm not naive enough to believe physical attraction doesn't matter one whit in a relationship.
Quoting StoneColdKiller:
Sounds like you have low self esteem and not sure how much you love your husband.
If you love him, really any way he looks will not be a turn off, and if he loves you he will not want anyone but you.
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