*FINAL UPDATE IN BLUE* Your kids peanut allergy is a pain in my a** (EDIT)

[Anonymous]

Well, it's all over. I warned her ahead of time. I sent her those links, and she's convinced he's int he 4%, so I didn't push it. But I told her if he can't touch anything peanut-related than my house will not be safe for them. I told her my aunt always makes a pecan pie for Christmas because it's sort of a tradition and I couldn't ask her not to since she's coming in from out of town. (Pulled that entire story out of my ass). So anyway, last minute she decided not to come. But I made her a couple plates of food (basic stuff that I knew was okay) and brought it over. I don't know if she ate it or not, but I did my part.

Thanks for all the advice ladies!

Confession: I can't stand this woman... I have to redo my entire menu because this woman is coming for christmas and bringing her child who has a peanut allergy. I'm not bashing the kid, but the mom is so damn picky that it makes it sooo difficult to cater to her needs on an already stressful day. Ugh.

Some Basic Facts:

I didn't "invite" her. Somehow lines of communication got incorrectly crossed. She is not "my" friend. We are casual acquaintances because our sons are very good friends. I had no idea how extreme she was with her childs' allergies.

Peanut-related ingredients are not just foods containing whole peanuts. Read your labels on EVERYTHING and you will find many unsafe things in your own home. Flour, oil, stuffing, macaroni, bread, bread crumbs, TONS of things. Think about all the ingredients you use for the holidays.

And she isn't asking that I simply skip actual peanut-dishes (which would be reasonable). She is asking that I read all labels and throw away all "unsafe" ingredients, then scrub and sanitize my ENTIRE house and replace cookie sheets because those are a "definite" threat because I made PB cookies a few months ago on them.

She is NOT offering to purchase anything, help clean, or bring her child a separate dish. I have a revolving door on the holidays. Anyone is welcome, I just ask that they bring something. I cannot guarantee that EVERYONE will purchase new oil, flour, whatever they use and either sterilize or buy new containers and utensils.

I wonder if I should bring this website to her attention. This is coming from a pretty reliable source, but I will continue to look. So either she's blowing this WAY out of proportion, or she doesn't know the facts. But after dealing with this for sooo long, I'm assuming she knows but doesn't want to admit it...

http://www.aaaai.org/ask-the-expert/anaphylaxis-to-peanut-from-touching.aspx

 

[Anonymous]

"I'm sorry. I get that your son's peanut allergy is a major thing, I get that he can get really sick, I get that you want to protect him. But you need to get that I might not be able to afford to completely replace everything in my pantry with 'safe' foods as well as all my baking pans and cookware, I have a family and while I keep my house clean, I need to take time with them instead of extra time to sanitize everything, it just can't happen. If you feel your child would truly be in danger coming to my home on Christmas, then it might be a better idea to have a playdate for the boys at your house a couple days after Christmas instead of you coming here on Christmas day."

[Amy1973Potts]

I dont understand parents who foist their childrens issues onto others like its THEIR issue too. That woman has some balls DEMANDING you spend money to accomodate her child (when you barely know her or her kid) or one meal, nakes no offer to help or accomodate herself. Does she expect the nut filled world to bend to her? Allergies are serious shit. But honestly....if the kid was THAT allergic to necessitate needing new PANS (peanut proteins nay have denatured by that point, but who knows), then hinestly her kids has ALOT more to.worry about and probably shouldnt leave the house and probably DOES need a bubble. Sonebody eating, chewing and BREATHING PB breath could set him off. Shit you not. Respired volatile oil particles of peanuts in the air..thats why the peanut free flights. And peanut dust. Not kidding.

[sammygrl77]

She needs to bring her own food for him or stay home. And this is coming from a mom to a child with a life threatening seafood allergy.

[Anonymous]

Un-invite her. Tell her that you cannot guarantee that everyone will purchase new oil, flour, etc, etc. Tell her you are worried about her son's safety and it's better they don't come because you realize peanut-related items are everywhere. And finally, tell her you'll go to her place instead.

[Anonymous]

HOLY CRAP!!! SERIOUSLY??? I would tell her she is not coming to my house with all of those demands!! I totally understand allergies, but man--she sounds like a whackado to me!

I use to babysit a baby who was allergic to peanuts, rice, corn, eggs and milk! I thought to myself WTH is his mom going to feed that kid?? YIKES!

Good luck OP! I hope everything works out! It sounds like a nightmare IMO.

[Anonymous]

She should bring food for her own kid then or eat before hand. It's ridiculnous for her to ask all of that of you! Man am I glad my kids don't have allergies!

[StarLight23]

BUMP!

[Keara20]

She says she is. She has "nut" "citrus acid" allergies but she eats all that shit. I'm making the ham with pineapple cuz she's been eating that shit. If she can rat it at home, she can eat it at my house. I used to be really cautious about it, then I stopped lol. When she can sit here and eat a pwanutbutter cup and a glass of oj in the same sitting I'm convinced she's full of shit now

Quoting Anonymous:

omg..I'm just kidding but is your mil really allergic to life? Thanks for the giggle:)

Quoting Keara20:

That's not right. Are you putting nuts in everything??? My mil is allergic to life and I have no issues cooking for her. I make the cheeseball without the nuts. duh.

[Keara20]

She says she is anyway. shes annoying

Quoting minimoo:

Your mother in law is allergic to life???? That would be a hard one to live with ;-)

Quoting Keara20:

That's not right. Are you putting nuts in everything??? My mil is allergic to life and I have no issues cooking for her. I make the cheeseball without the nuts. duh.

[Anonymous]

Honestly if her child has a allergy she should bring food the child can eat if she was that worried about it. Its not fair to you to have to go through all that work. As the kids mom I wouldnt expect you to. As the mom id bring what my child can eat.