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Can Someone Explain? (CT Tragedy)

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 13 Replies
Okay, I'm going to make this the last post about the tragedy that unfolded on Friday. It's going to be rambling, more than likely, but I just need to get it out there.
How? How does a parent bury their child? How do they go on from that? I don't think I could. I have 3 kids and I can honestly say that if I lost one of them, I'd lose myself. I would never be the same. How does a person look at those innocent little faces and take that away from this world? How are these parents going to go on from this? How are they going to celebrate Christmas, seeing those unopened gifts under the tree and knowing what happened?
Maybe it's PMS, IDK, but it just kind of hit me....HOW? How does something like this happen? I just don't understand it, I don't get it. Don't tell me it's because there's lax gun laws. Don't tell me that it's because God isn't in schools or whatever....that may be YOUR answer, but I need something logical....I need to be able to process how tragedies like this happen. I'm not sure why it's affecting me on such a level as it is, but I just can't.....IDK......I want to go to those parents and I just want to do SOMETHING...IDK what, but I feel like I need to do something, if nothing else than to calm the pain in my own heart......
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MamaTasha08
by Gold Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:29 AM

Why do kids die every day?  Why do some children starve to death or get beaten to death?  The list goes on and on.  The fact is we can let tragedy consume us, or we can say a prayer (or whatever you do if you are not religious) and move on.  I'm not being cold-hearted, I just think we need to go one living and be grateful that we still have our children to love and do just that.

jessi2girls
by Emerald Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:32 AM

Have you looked into possible donations for these families to help cover funeral costs??

It may be a huge help to some of these families that may not be able to afford things like that. 

gardengirl23
by Silver Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:35 AM
1 mom liked this

I tell myself everyday that my children are not MINE.  Everyday is a gift with them.  I have no idea how many days I have been gifted.  I ask my self often....if they were to be taken from me today, did I give them my all?  

CorpCityGrl
by Ruby Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:36 AM

We may never find an answer.  Unfortunately, we live in a violent world and sometimes it makes no sense whatsoever.  As a parent, I watch this tragedy on tv and my heart goes out to these familes who have to learn how to move on and I'll be honest and say that some of them won't make it...I don't think I would make it if I was in their shoes. 

If you want to help, send out your thoughts or prayers.  You can send flowers to the memorial in Newtown or even donate money to several funds that have been set up under several of the kids' names and/or even to defer the funeral costs. 

gardengirl23
by Silver Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:38 AM

I agree, I think of all the parents who have lost their children silently to cancer or accidents or other forms of violence who don't have their names and faces splashed across the media.  It happens everyday and each time I have these Sandy Hook children in my
"thoughts and prayers" I do it for all the parents and siblings who have lost someone.

Quoting MamaTasha08:

Why do kids die every day?  Why do some children starve to death or get beaten to death?  The list goes on and on.  The fact is we can let tragedy consume us, or we can say a prayer (or whatever you do if you are not religious) and move on.  I'm not being cold-hearted, I just think we need to go one living and be grateful that we still have our children to love and do just that.


artistmom889
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:38 AM

 How do you make something logical that just isn't? All I know is that the way through it is one excruciating second at a time. I do beleive that  when humans survive the impossible, it builds strength.

What decent mother wouldn't be affected by this What decent human being wouldn't be?

Simmeringhearts
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:42 AM

I have been told the same thing about burying my first husband when I was 31 and our children were 8 and 11. You may not like the answer. But, they have no choice. No one asked those parents what they thought about it. Anymore than someone asked my grandfather when he buried 2 of his children and a wife. No one asked me when I had to bury my husband. Tomorrow is his birthday. And my dad when he just buried one of his daughters. Life sucks at times. No one would actually step up and volunteer to do what these parents have to do. It is just something that they now have to do. And now, they have to go on with life. And we have to support them in any way possible.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:42 AM

It's not a question of How... but the fact is there is no choice but to.

I didn't want to bury my son.... but what other choices did I have? It was the hardest day of my life (next to the day he passed). Watching his tiny body in the casket and then they shut the casket to take him to the cemetery.... I knew I'd never see him again (well until I went to heaven). I will never forget the time he was here and holding him and getting my hopes up that he would make it. I fell in love with him when I was pregnant with him. He was all i could think about. :(

And no... i'm not the same. Never will be. But I learned to cope over the years. Time does heal.. but not completely. He will always be in my thoughts each and every day. 


And there is no explaining why horrible things happen to innocent lives. It's sad and it's not fair. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:44 AM

Because those parents have to go on. they have to continue living for the children they lost. For the children that remain and for themselves.

I think we can all sit back and say whe won't be able to survive without our kids but not many of us have lost children tragically like that.

I am sure their hearts are aching but there is some deep strength that people have in times of tragedy and i think we all cling to that when we are faced with it.

KenneMaw
by Ruby Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 11:53 AM

The human spirit is much more resilient that we ever imagine and we are stronger than we will ever know.   The pain of losing a child is devastating, but as a human, your internal instinct is to survive, to move forward.   iI you  have other children YOU MUST go on.  If you choose not to move forward, then what does that say to your other children?    Also, i really truly believe that our children or other loved ones that have passed would want us to live a happy life.  Don't we owe it to them - to live the life they never got to have?  I think we do.  It is normal and required to grieve, but there is a season for that and then you have to realize the world still goes on, the sun comes up each day.

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