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Revoking parental rights without a lawyer..has anyone done it?

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:02 PM
  • 18 Replies

My DD(6) bio-father has NEVER been in her life, his choice. He saw her once when she was 18mths old. I have received maybe $3000 in child support over the last 5 years and that is being generous I never really calculated just how much. I have been with my DH for over 3 years, HE is her father. She has no idea about her biodad. Basically I wanna revoke his rights, I don't want child support (I have lived without it this long), I don't want him to have access to my child unless she wants to when she gets older. We can't really afford a lawyer right now so I am wondering if there is anyway I can just do it without one? Idk if it helps/hinders anything but we are in different states so would that make it more difficult and do I file in my state or the state he lives in? And would my DH have to adopt her right away or could we do that later on? We were gonna do a joint adoption with my SS and DD but we are having issues finding my SS BM so it could be a while before that happens. TIA.

by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:02 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Mommynwife26
by Gold Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:11 PM

Bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:12 PM
Depends on the state.
randi1978
by Murdoc's Mistress on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:14 PM

You will need to contact the courts in your state regarding step parent adoption paperwork.  Possibly look up what the steps are online, if you can.  Sometimes, the court offers packets that have all the information you need to proceed, but sometimes you have to get different things for different steps.

jamamama00
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:14 PM

Your DH does not have to adopt her right away. But I can't imagine that a judge would approve anything like this without you going through a lawyer. I've had friends let the dad sign the rights away, and they just had to save up for it. Also, I would imagine that three adoptions are going to cost a LOT of money.

joyfullem
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:16 PM

This is what I know about it in South Carolina you need a lawyer.  Because the parent giving up the rights has to be counseld by a lawyer so that they 'understand all the implications'  If you are trying to take them forcefully you would do well to get one becuase if he fights things could go the opposite way especially if he gets a lawyer. I was told by my lawyer that Judges do not like to leave children fatherless so they like to have someone willing to adopt.  It isn't easy to take away rights does he have visitation?  In order to take his rights you have to serve him and if he has visitation he could suddenly want to see her and you would have to comply and it would ruin your case.  GL

Mommynwife26
by Gold Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:32 PM

Im in WA he's in NV.

Quoting Anonymous:

Depends on the state.


Mommynwife26
by Gold Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:33 PM

I tried looking it up online but all it says is that it can be done with abandonment afer 5 years but nothing about what papers need to be done or what to do if the parties are in 2 different states. I even called family lawyers but none are offering free consultations.

Quoting randi1978:

You will need to contact the courts in your state regarding step parent adoption paperwork.  Possibly look up what the steps are online, if you can.  Sometimes, the court offers packets that have all the information you need to proceed, but sometimes you have to get different things for different steps.


Mommynwife26
by Gold Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:35 PM
Quoting joyfullem:

This is what I know about it in South Carolina you need a lawyer.  Because the parent giving up the rights has to be counseld by a lawyer so that they 'understand all the implications'  If you are trying to take them forcefully you would do well to get one becuase if he fights things could go the opposite way especially if he gets a lawyer. I was told by my lawyer that Judges do not like to leave children fatherless so they like to have someone willing to adopt.  It isn't easy to take away rights does he have visitation?  In order to take his rights you have to serve him and if he has visitation he could suddenly want to see her and you would have to comply and it would ruin your case.  GL

No visitation, no custody nothing. It was all given to me and he never fought it but he refuses to sign his rights over too (idk why he would be out of the debt and be able to get his license back etc)

Mommynwife26
by Gold Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:37 PM

It would be 2 adoptions, him adopting my DD me adopting his son. but we knew that it would be a long time before that would happen. I just wanna get it done but if we need a lawyer we will just save up for one.

Quoting jamamama00:

Your DH does not have to adopt her right away. But I can't imagine that a judge would approve anything like this without you going through a lawyer. I've had friends let the dad sign the rights away, and they just had to save up for it. Also, I would imagine that three adoptions are going to cost a LOT of money.


joyfullem
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:38 PM

Ok I do know that you file in the state that the child is a resident in this case the one you live in.  He has to make the effort to come all the way out to fight it.  I know that here abandonment is 1 year 5 is a LONG time! You can find Pro-bono lawyers but I am not sure that this would qualify because you are pursuing it and it isn't an active threat.  Getting parental rights revoked is difficult

Quoting Mommynwife26:

Quoting joyfullem:

This is what I know about it in South Carolina you need a lawyer.  Because the parent giving up the rights has to be counseld by a lawyer so that they 'understand all the implications'  If you are trying to take them forcefully you would do well to get one becuase if he fights things could go the opposite way especially if he gets a lawyer. I was told by my lawyer that Judges do not like to leave children fatherless so they like to have someone willing to adopt.  It isn't easy to take away rights does he have visitation?  In order to take his rights you have to serve him and if he has visitation he could suddenly want to see her and you would have to comply and it would ruin your case.  GL

No visitation, no custody nothing. It was all given to me and he never fought it but he refuses to sign his rights over too (idk why he would be out of the debt and be able to get his license back etc)


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