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Following the CT shootings....

Posted by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:52 PM
  • 30 Replies

 

Poll

Question: WIll you be changing your parenting ways?

Options:

Yes

No

Other (Because there is always an other)


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Total Votes: 44

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I see alot of post re: gun control, blamimg mom/home life, blaming a mental illness, etc but I was wondering if, since this tragedy, will you be changing the way you parent your children or are you taking a second look at how you are raising your children?

by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:56 PM

we are protective of our children as it is so we wont change that. The change we have made is that they will now be homeschooled. Our son has autism and for that reason we were on the fence but this has really pushed us over. 

The day of we were out running errands and I know that was boring for them so we stopped at a toystore and let them run around and pick out some stuff. They are spoiled but situations like this make you realize how lucky we are to have such great children

mitchiesgirl
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 12:59 PM

For a mother of an autistic child, do you personally feel Lanza did these things because he was autistic or because of other factors? 

Quoting Anonymous:

we are protective of our children as it is so we wont change that. The change we have made is that they will now be homeschooled. Our son has autism and for that reason we were on the fence but this has really pushed us over. 

The day of we were out running errands and I know that was boring for them so we stopped at a toystore and let them run around and pick out some stuff. They are spoiled but situations like this make you realize how lucky we are to have such great children


RunningMommaof2
by Kelly on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:01 PM
2 moms liked this
Not at all. However, I WILL be changing the way I advocate for social services for both children and the mentally ill. Enough is enough.
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vicki77433
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:03 PM

No.  I already do the best I can for my kids. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I certainly don't think I'm raising children capable of mass murder.

egbkeb
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:05 PM
I didn't know it was possible, but after Friday's shootings we are cherishing our daughters more & it shows in our parenting. We take more time to do even the tiniest things with them. I've suddenly started taking more pictures of them. Santa brought them a few extra gifts this year. They hear "I love you" more, especially when we are about to part for a little while. They aren't school age yet but I'm researching local school districts' security systems & online schools. We have been forever changed by this tragedy. :(
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:06 PM

It is not just the CT shooting that has been molding my views on parenting, although it has continued to reaffirm some of my beliefs. I don't live in fear, although some would probably disagree with me. I am in essence a helicopter parent. I want to know what she's doing, who she's with, who's there, who the other children's parents are. When I would take her to the park, I would engage parents there. When my child asked to go play at a friend's house (when she was younger), I would go as well until I was comfortable with the parents. I actively discouraged my child to play at a friend's house if I deemed the parents irresponsible; although that child could come to my house if they pleased. I encourage my child to call me if she decides she wants to go somewhere. If she does not, there are consequences. She is not allowed to have a desktop in her room privately. Some would say I don't give my child enough "freedom". Well she can piss, crap, take a shower, write in her journal on her own, talk to her friends privately on the phone, choose her friends on her own, pick what sport she wants to be in, pick her clothes (within reason) and actively state her opinions and feelings without all hell breaking loose; I'd say she has plenty of freedom. 

sparklebug86
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:06 PM

depends I guess. Our son is high functioning and he does get in moods but I dont think they would ever last long enough. Our biggest concern for our son is that he will be bullied and that guy may have been since he wasnt socialized properly. Maybe he saw children in school as "normal" and therefor threatening? Back when he was little, autism was rare and unknown territory and so he may have been handled very harshley by his mother which will make the issues worse in the long run. Now a days we know to handle autistic children with more care and patience so help them grow in a loving environment. In this case the guy should not have been allowed to move outside of the home because it sounds like he was on a more severe scale. I know to always watch my son closely when others try to take a toy away or tease him because he becomes mad quickly but they dont last long and we will work on it as he gets older. 

Does than answer your question?

Quoting mitchiesgirl:

For a mother of an autistic child, do you personally feel Lanza did these things because he was autistic or because of other factors? 

Quoting Anonymous:

we are protective of our children as it is so we wont change that. The change we have made is that they will now be homeschooled. Our son has autism and for that reason we were on the fence but this has really pushed us over. 

The day of we were out running errands and I know that was boring for them so we stopped at a toystore and let them run around and pick out some stuff. They are spoiled but situations like this make you realize how lucky we are to have such great children



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MistyMoo
by Emerald Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:08 PM
No, I'm very strict with my son. He's severely autistic and he needs the discipline otherwise he can get pretty hyped up. I am the primary parent for him, his father is schizophrenic and just had a major break down last year, so he only sees him on weekends until he gets bak into the groove of working and taking care of himself again. I don't want him to rush anything because I'm not going to run off with our son lol.. Anyways, it works out good because I can be strict and my efforts don't seem to be for nothing now. I'd like to think that I'm raising my son well.
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StarLight23
by Platinum Member on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:10 PM

 I know you weren't talking to me, but If I may give my opinion..

No. My son has autism this was NOT caused by autism. This is completely different! The boy knew what he was doing and he was going to do it. My guess is the shooter  was psychologically sick (maybe schitzophrania or even manic depression) and his mother ignored it.

No this is NOT caused by autism at all! The media is just trying to make excuses and to JUSTIFY doing something so heinous it's ridiculous!

Okay.. now I'm ranting :)

Rant Over!

Quoting mitchiesgirl:

For a mother of an autistic child, do you personally feel Lanza did these things because he was autistic or because of other factors? 

Quoting Anonymous:

we are protective of our children as it is so we wont change that. The change we have made is that they will now be homeschooled. Our son has autism and for that reason we were on the fence but this has really pushed us over. 

The day of we were out running errands and I know that was boring for them so we stopped at a toystore and let them run around and pick out some stuff. They are spoiled but situations like this make you realize how lucky we are to have such great children



mitchiesgirl
by on Dec. 18, 2012 at 1:16 PM

I completely understand how you feel... My husband comes home and all four of us (him, myself, and our 10 year old DS and 2 year old DD) hug and spend much more time together in the evening. 

I will be honest, I am not changing my parenting style but I will be slowing down my pace and spend much more time with them and just talking. 

Quoting egbkeb:

I didn't know it was possible, but after Friday's shootings we are cherishing our daughters more & it shows in our parenting. We take more time to do even the tiniest things with them. I've suddenly started taking more pictures of them. Santa brought them a few extra gifts this year. They hear "I love you" more, especially when we are about to part for a little while. They aren't school age yet but I'm researching local school districts' security systems & online schools. We have been forever changed by this tragedy. :(


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