Well I said if he didn't get me a gift I was going to divorce him it was the final straw - eta
Eta - I finally got through the replies and realized a lot of you didn't understand my post. First of all, dh and I have been together 6 years and I do all of the work in the house and child raising. He has never helped out and has always made me feel unappreciated. He has never made me feel loved or appreciated. There is no mutual agreement that we don't do gifts. He expects a gifty from me for occassions and knows I expect one too. And its not like I'm a sahm and he works. We both work equally and make the same amount of money with plenty left over after bills.
I didn't tell him if he doesn't get me a gift that I would divorce him. Actually I have asked for a divorce twice in 8 months and he has promised to change. I haven't been seeing much change. He knows I wanted a gift for Christmas. He knows I don't expect anything expensive or extravagant. Even just something very small and inexpensive would have been wonderful. I thought to myself he knows that I've been unhappy in the marriage and he knows that he promised to change. I just wanted proof that he actually is listenbing and willing to change. like I said, even a $5 movie or something would have thrilled me. Anything just to show he is listening to me. I told him (as I did everyone else) a wide range of things I'd like for Christmas. Things that ranged from a couple of dollars and up. By getting me this he proved that he is listening to me and willing to change. I really don't think this makes me materialistic. He shows his love to family by giving them gifts. I do the same. So why can't we show eachother love by exchanging gifts (which of course I gave him one as well, same as I always do). And of course I know this doesn't make everything ok. We are being very open with eachother and are planning to start marriage counseling and are both now willing to work on our marriage to make it last. I don't want a divorce but I also don't want to be in a marriage that is so one sided. And by communicating with him how I feel he understands and is willing to help fix our marriage.