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WTF is wrong with me!!! GAH

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 14 Replies
OK, so 5 months ago I had my 4th child. As with all my children I am so totally and completely in love. I also have 2 step children. So my kids are ages 16, 12, 5, 3, 1 1/2, and 5 months. My husband and I agreed this would be our last baby. For several reasons.
1. I have an incompetent cervix. My last 3 pregnancies ended in premature births. I thank God every day to have my happy healthy babies. I know I am very lucky as it is and don't want too push it.
2. We have 3 boys and 3 girls. Perfect.
3. We have no more room in our house. And I refuse to sell it. LOL. I bought it just before having my first.
4. Financially this is all we can handle. And we know that.
There are more reasons too.

Here's my problem. I think I am addicted to babies!!!! I love my kids, of coarse, but every single stinking day I dream of that first year. I know as they grow older they will grow more independent and further from me. It scares the living shit out of me that I wont be able to take care of them, protect them, and be with them forever.
I can tell you this- I am definatly not rushing these years by!!

Thinking about my last baby not being a baby terrifies me. What will I do???? Gah.

I'm starting to think there is something seriously wrong with my head. Other than that I feel I am like any other doting mother.

Of coarse I want my babies to grow up. I much prefer that over the alternative. I just don't know why I am so scared! It makes my chest constrict! If I could freeze time ( or really just slow it way way down) I would. I don't want things to change. I love my children and am going to miss these years as they fly by.
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:14 AM
Anyone? Am I the only one?
imultracool
by Gold Member on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:16 AM
Maybe you should consider fostering an infant?
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4m4nd4
by on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:17 AM

no your not the only one.

4m4nd4
by on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:17 AM

i dont want to see my kids grow up and not need me anymore. i think its natural for a mother to feel this

MumsTheWord571
by on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:18 AM
My aunt was like that. So after her 4th child she had her tubes tied. The dr argued with her since she was 22, but she said- look, I know me. If you don't tie my tubes I'll have 10 kids because as soon as they hit 1 I want another.

I love the kids being little, but much prefer them at 2 or so when they can tell me what they want/need. I also hate being pregnant, so my 2 are just perfect!
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:18 AM
Mother instincts. Normal after just having a baby.
sweet_misery
by Bronze Member on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:19 AM
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first you're not the only one. I hate the thought of my girls growing up. I miss the ittybitty stages. :( but we can dwell on that or be proud of how They are turning out.
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lovinmykiddo07
by Ruby Member on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:19 AM
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Work at a daycare? I work with infants and that is how I get my baby fix.
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sheramom4
by Ruby Member on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:20 AM
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I had my tubes tied after my 4th because of pregnancy issues and premature labor. Now some 9 years later DH and I are in the very beginning parts of adopting from foster care....

We would have a house full if it is our choice...at least 2-3 more children and open to more than that as well....

bustybee
by Buzz Lightyear on Dec. 30, 2012 at 1:21 AM

I love the baby stage but love 3+ more. I'm pregnant with #4 and plan on having 2 more

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