Need some rational advice because I'm very upset. ****UPDATED *******
I will be contacting my lawyer in the morning and getting his advice. Not sure why I posed this post as a question. I was and still am very upset. I know what I need to do. It may be nothing but it definitely can not be ignored and the best thing I can do is get to the bottom of it legally.
I'm divorced from my first husband. We have two boys together, they are five and seven. My ex and I are both remarried. We agreed when we split if we ever got remarried we expect our children to respect and listen to their step parents but that any spankings would only be given by us, their parents. We are both remarried. Spanking rarely happens at our house, they have to do something very serious for me to spank them. I can't even remember the last time I spanked them. Well I just picked them up from their dad about an hour ago and what they told me on the way home has me very upset.
My five year old said that his step mom got upset with him over tying his shoes. We have been working on it at home and he is getting better but still needs help. So that was number one. Then he said mom Michelle spanks us a lot. I said what do you mean ? He said every weekend when we are with them we get spanked. My seven year old has been getting upset lately when it's Friday and time to go to their dads. He cries and hugs me and says I just miss you mom. Something about it has bugged me but I just figured it was because he was upset so it made me upset. Well when my five year old told me this, my seven year old said Brian, remember we aren't supposed to tell mom. I thought to myself what the fuck ??? I said what aren't you supposed to tell me ? And he said, that Michelle spanks us. He then said that's why I don't like going to dads because we are always getting spanked. And when dad does it it's really hard. And here's the kicker, my seven year old told me if one of them gets spanked for something then the other gets spanked because Michelle says to.
I'm not quite sure how to handle this, I'm livid. My husband does not spank my children because he agrees its not his place which is also what my ex and I decided if either of us got remarried and now I find this out. They both told me Michelle gets upset with them a lot and tells their dad they need spankings and they get them. So it sounds to me like Michelle is getting frustrated with them and taking it out on them by spanking them. Michelle is 42 and has no children of her own. And of course my ex listens to whatever she says. We were getting along till he married her, now I'm not allowed to speak to him. It's been getting a little worse all the time. I keep my cool and be the bigger person but this has put me over the edge.
What do you all think ?