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caught my almost 16 year old having sex in her room*update*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

i ran up to the grocery store not even gone for an hour and when i get home? i see a car in the front, thinking it might just be someone from next door i didnt think anything of it, so i walked in the house and noticed shoes iv never seen before, i ran up stairs instantly and caught her and this older boy having sex. idk how old he was but he flew out of there like a bat out of hell. my dd ran into the bathroom and locked the door, and wouldnt come out for nearly an hour. never thought my dd would have sex this early, taught her everything she needed to know about protecting herself, and i never even knew she was seeing someone. when she came out of the bathroom she told me how long they have been together,and then told me she snuck to a clinic to get the depo shot and has been on it since her and the boy have started dating....she then told me his age...he's turning 18 in 2 months.

ugh i dont know what to think or do right now, i took away her computer and phone but shes still going to see him at school, i know i cant tell her not to see himcan anyone help me?

edit:dd said she wanted to talk when everything is calmed down, im going to go up there in a few minutes...idk what to ever say to her

update:we finished talking, she said she was sorry and that she deserves her phone and computer being taken away. i told her we're going to our hospital on saturday and then again in a month to get her tested and to get her on a different birth control, and that she has tell him to come here on sunday for dinner. i told her id give her,her things back after the hospital visit and that he was only able to come here when im home, and she has to come straight hom from school every single day

update again: the guy came back!!!! a few minutes after i posted the update someone knocked on the door and as i open it i realized it was the boy my dd had over, he was looking at the floor and said "im sorry i know we shouldnt have done anything in your house and i appologize, it was mostly my idea, but i never pressured her into it, i just brought it up while talking to her on fb last week. again im really sorry" i told him that i was taking her to her ob on saturday to get her tested and to put her on new birthcontrol, and then id be taking her back again in a month to get her tested again.

he just shook his head yes and says "i got tested once a year before i got with Pixie so if you still want to get her tested thats fine" i asked him what he meant he said this "before Pixie i went from girl to girl because my parents never cared what i did, then pixie came around and i tried impressing her until she finally said yes to me 7 months ago" i told him to come to dinner on sunday and we'll all talk together but right now i didnt want to even see him near my house, he shook his head yes again apologized and walked to his car. when i closed the door i saw my dd leaning over the banister with a terrified face lol i couldnt help but laugh honestly

DOH!!! forgot to add his name!!! his name is Alexander and his anime club nickname is Greaver, putting 2 and 2 together thats where he met my dd lol

oh and just to give you a visual of what this guy looks like. im 5 foot 9(dd is 5'7), i had to slightly look up at him to talk to him, he has black hair and dip dyed blue chunks, wears eye liner, skinny jeans,has an eye brow ring and lip ring, i could see the thin marks of a tattoo on his arm, and had scars on his wrist (which made me kind of sad) not saying any of that is bad what so ever just giving you all a visual

update: so took her to the OB yesterday, told the doc she had sex and i wanted her to be tested for std's and sti's, so they took blood work and the doc checked for chlamydia and gonorrhea.it must have hurt because dd got dizy i felt horrible for making her do it but i want to make sure shes safe. as we walked out of the ob's office and Alexander was sitting in the waiting room, told me he just wanted to make sure dd was alright and that he'd be over to the house early tomorrow (today now that im posting this) so i took dd home and she went to her room without a word, when i went to take her phone and computer back to her she was asleep. now alexander is here and its 10 AM,they are sitting in the living room watching movies on netflix. ill update again after we all talk

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 3, 2013 at 6:58 PM
Replies (11-20):
sampson200
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:02 PM
1 mom liked this

Well, she's 16......there isn't much you CAN do.

At least she was proactive about her sexual health.

Has she been schooled on the possibilities of pregnancy even with protections and shots and STDs?

Right now is a delicate time.

I would punish her for lying and sneaking a boy into YOUR home, but be careful; the bigger and more horrible you make this, the more she might start to hide it from you.

Let her know you're angry, but let her know you're also angry because she wasn't honest with you about being sexually active.

It's uncomfortable for both of you, but I would rather have uncomfortable conversations than a pregnant child, a child with a permanent disease, or a child with a bad reputation among her peers.

AubreeGrace17
by Platinum Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:03 PM

She's 16...not six. That's not early to start having sex, it's average. I would be wondering as a parent why she didn't want to come to me for birth control.  You must be pretty strict.

alexakaym
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:03 PM

Mine is 16 months, and have another LO on the way .Hoping for a boy! Yea, she already has some smart ass in her so I am nervous lol.

Quoting Anonymous:

Tell me about it! My daughter is 1 and I am already worrying about the teenage years :/

Quoting alexakaym:

It's stories like these that make me want to shove my DD back up into my womb. I'd say it sounds like you are doing all you can. I would take her in to get tested however and be firm with your punishment.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:03 PM


Quoting stephiebugg:

 Duh, sorry, she's almost 16.
Hang in there and get her tested and insist she use condoms.
Good luck.

i found 2 used condoms, but im still going to go get her tested, idk what this guy has if he has anything

priceless3238
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:03 PM
Btw in most states she is the legal age to have sex
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MyDragonFlies11
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:04 PM
Ok so first put her on birth control unless u want grand babies... try not yo shame her into thinking u think she is a whore ... and make sure u tell her just because she has done it before doesnt mean she has to do it again
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:04 PM
Mine is 15 months and already flirts with all the boys. She scares me.

Quoting alexakaym:

Mine is 16 months, and have another LO on the way .Hoping for a boy! Yea, she already has some smart ass in her so I am nervous lol.


Quoting Anonymous:

Tell me about it! My daughter is 1 and I am already worrying about the teenage years :/



Quoting alexakaym:

It's stories like these that make me want to shove my DD back up into my womb. I'd say it sounds like you are doing all you can. I would take her in to get tested however and be firm with your punishment.


jcm28
by Gold Member on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:04 PM
1 mom liked this

So you think grounding her from her having a boyfriend will do what?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:05 PM
At least she protected herself and was smart about it. I know it must be heart breaking but she was smart about it.
kaiser10123
by on Jan. 3, 2013 at 7:05 PM
Oh no! I have two boys so I can't relate but just remember you we're once her age and if your mom caught you how would you want her to handle this situation. Listen to her with no yelling and help her protect herself so no babies pop up. Good luck!
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