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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Confessions of a Labor & Delivery nurse

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 281 Replies
66 moms liked this


1. I don't like going to the OR for c-sections. Actually most of us don't.

2. Dad, stop asking me how much the baby weighs. I know you're excited, but your wife's vagina doesn't have a secret scale in there. The baby JUST came out and is lying on your wife's chest.

3. Stop commenting on how big your son's testicles are, it makes you seem perverted.

4. I don't have secret epidural agenda. In fact I don't really care what you do for pain management, I'm here to support whatever choice you make.

5. Grandma, its great you did it without an epidural, but don't make your daughter feel guilty if she chooses too .

6. Charge nurse, can I have a minute to go pee? I haven't gone in 8 hours!!

7. If your water breaks and you are GBS positive , do not wait 12 hours before coming in. Because. you. will. get. chorioamniotis.

8. No, Dr. I'm not increasing the pitocin if the baby is in fetal distress. We have a protocol jackass.

9. My hand doesn't have a telescope so nope, I don't know the color of your baby's hair.

10. What? You brought the nurses chocolate? We love you long time.

11. I don't mind picking up trash on your floor and wiping your behind and cleaning your vomit, but don't be fooled, I do have a Masters degree and I kinda know what I'm doing.

12. Moms, labor and delivery is the easy part. Trust me.

13. Not all babies are cute. But they all are precious.

14. Labor and delivery is an art and science. Most of us do care and enjoy our job.

15. Things can go badly quickly. I've seen it. Be flexible and open in your birth plan.

16. Birth is a miracle and amazes me EVERYTIME, And I've seen hundreds and hundreds of births. I've been known to cry on occasion!


Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:24 PM
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Replies (1-10):
hopeym23
by J3 on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:26 PM
2 moms liked this

Thank you for posting this.  I didn't like going to the OR for my 3 sections either.  :)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:28 PM
4 moms liked this
Ever seen a blue waffle?
Rileyscute
by on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:29 PM
1 mom liked this

word..I hated the OR for my C-section..I am sure all involved did too

(twin birth..docs, residents, nursing staff, and 2 peds..it was a mad house in there)

LyTe684
by Ruby Member on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:30 PM
:)
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:30 PM
1 mom liked this
I never thought of taking chocolate to the nurses. Is that allowed, like how some professionals can't accept gifts for whatever reason?

I'm posting anon because I feel dumb asking. Lol
ms.ames
by on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:30 PM
6 moms liked this

I have a question, what's the most horrible name you've heard?

Fistandantalus
by on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:31 PM

Awesome.

embersparkle
by on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:31 PM
I always feel bad for the nurses that went in with me for my c-sections. I was scared all three times and sure I drove them nuts asking if everything was ok every two seconds.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:31 PM
1 mom liked this
Do they test every baby for drugs?
i_lovedyoufirst
by Gabriella (: on Jan. 4, 2013 at 8:31 PM
1 mom liked this
I loved all my nurses for my labors!
One of em even delivered Natalie (:
Have you ever delivered a baby?
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