9k a month in take home pay........

[Anonymous]

And dh still won't let me shop.  I thought more money would mean more fun for us, like vacations, shopping, date nights.  We have enough to pay our bills, put about a thousand in savings a month and still have about a thousand to play with.  But For some reason we are still living like we can barely scrape by.  I know hubby likes to save for the future but damn, can a girl get a mani pedi every once in a while.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like OP is a "free spirit" spender, and her DH is a "nerd" saver. That's actually a healthy balance in a marriage.

Quoting Anonymous:

Wow that's similar to my dhs income and we put away a TON and we live very comfortably. Where is your money going?? :|

[moneysaver6]

Wow. That's not much savings for that much net income per month. I'd aim for $2K-$3K (20% of gross) to savings minimum. Perhaps that's your husband's goal?

Regardless, you two should sit down & discuss the budget together so you're both on the same page.

[AleaKat]

Maybe you should make your own bank account then.

[Anonymous]

We live below our means comfortably. What if something happens in his job and he has to take a pay cut, or loses the job all together? Honestly, I would never feel comfortable only being able to save $1000 a month, especially in this economy.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

Quoting Anonymous:

What do you and Dh do for a living ?

I'm in pr, he's government contracting and he's in the reserves.

[mydarlingsofia]

You should definitely be able to have some fun, but I'd stick to date nights and mani/pedi occasionally. Not tons of shopping and vacations all the time

[PaperClip811]

 

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting PaperClip811:

 is the money worth being controlled? We don't make nearly that and Im never told what I can do or cant do with our FAMILY income.

I'm not controlled.  Im a spender, and he gives me balance.  If we have a great retirement it will be because of him.  I just want to enjoy the now a little more, kwim?

 yeah I get that, just seems like if you cant even get a manicure (what is that like $30?) then you're not given much freedom. Maybe talk about getting a budgeted amount of money a week or month  that you can spend on whatever you please. And maybe research some vacationing spots/costs and talk to him about something you would really enjoy doing. Is the increase in pay fairly recent? Maybe he's just trying to continue to live below your means instead of jumping off the gun and blowing it all :o) Hope you get to take advantage of some of that extra income soon.

[Anonymous]

I am a SAHM but if I had to beg for money I would find a job.

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting Anonymous:

Quoting Anonymous:

Maybe this girl that you speak of should get a job!

Lol, this girl has a job.  A good one, at that.  3 of that 9 comes from my take home pay.  

My own checking acoount was my solution to that problem. Problem solved I don't have to ask him Jack crap that way.

I don't have to ask....but sometimes I want him to WANT to spoil me some.  Shit, now I sound like Jennifer Anniston in the Breakup - I want you to want to do the dishes, lol.

[moneysaver6]

Ask him about a specific amount monthly for spending money; say $50 or $100/month that's just yours to spend.

Also, talk about saving for your next vacation. That's a constant in our budget because we live on the other side of the country from family.