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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

A Lesson for a 15 year old. *EDIT!*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
Back story: my husband and my 2 young kids live with my MIL and DHs 2 teenage siblings. Yes I know this is a problem in itself and we are working on moving out. Anyway, so my MIL and me alternate weeks when we cook. This week is mine. We are low on money so I'm doing easy simple dinners. I said something like so I'm doing rutabaga egg nests and bacon tomorrow. Basically the rutabaga is hash browns. The 15 yr old girl said "ew that's nasty I'm not eating that." I was like do you even know what a rutabaga is?! You like potatoes don't you? Tastes just like it but more nutrients. She made another comment under her breath and I said "ya know what?! Why don't you make dinner for once?" She again bak talked me and said "ha I'm not making dinner that's stupid." Ohhhhhj giiiirl. Lol I was furious. Of course her mother did NOTHING. As usual. I always am getting lip from her.



So last night I was thinking about it. I was like what would I do if my kids acted that way when they are older. Got it! Give them $15-20 no more than $20. She has to plan out a dinner for one night. Take her to the store but she has no help with finding the ingredients. Catch is it has to accommodate the other sibling who is dairy and gluten intolerant. Then after she gets the stuff pay for it with the money. Come home and prepare it by 6pm. Set the table. Put the food on plates to serve. Then after dinner clean up the kitchen exactly how it should be done.



That's how me and my MIL do it. 6pm dinner and whoever cooks cleans.



Is this harsh? I think it would open her eyes and appreciate how much we actually do to plan an prepare the meals.



Should I propose this to her mother?

***EDIT*** guess I have l CLARIFY. I am NOT trying to parent her!! It was gonna be a suggestion to her mom. And I'm not telling her how to parent!! It was just an "eye opener" kinda thing.

I'm not gonna say anything to her about it, BUT I'm not gonna let some 15 year old best disrespect me. Also! It had nothing to do with the actual food I was making. It was her attitude towards the whole thing. This is NOT the first time she has mouthed off to me. Her mom has yelled at her before about it. And that was without me saying anything. It's just I was always brought up to respects elders especially when they cook dinner for you. My daughter granted she is 4 says ew I don't like this.. I immediately jump on her about it and say no that's not nice you don't say that.

Maybe what I said to her was smarting off but I don't give a damn. This girl has no respect for anyone in this house not just me and I'm not gonna let it slide!!
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:10 PM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:25 PM
I wouldn't go about it as a way of telling her what to do. More like a suggestion and "I'd do it to my kids" kinda thing. Idk..


Quoting chattycassie:

 I would not cross the line of telling ANY mom especially your MIL how to raise kids. 


mom2priceboys
by Gold Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:25 PM

at 15 and 18 thoses kids should be having their nights of cooking also and they need to shop from the provided pantry. So why do the other adults not have a cooking night as well?? Men cook at my house lol

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:27 PM
1 mom liked this

Yes you are supposed to let it go she's not your child and it's not your house,  you should be worrying about getting a place of your own not parenting other people's children!  I'm not saying she's in the right but it's not your place to teach her lessons!

Quoting Anonymous:

I know $20 isn't hard to do. That's not the point. The point is to show her how much work is put into feeding a household of 7. So that maybe she would appreciate it more.

And she does this often! About a lot of things. I am supposed to just let it go?


Quoting Anonymous:

It's not your child,  it's not your home,  just let it go!  And $20 for one dinner isn't that hard to do!



wildlilacs
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:29 PM
You can suggest it. But, it might be considered intruding as mil has her own way of doing things.
If lil sis dont want to eat, she can go hungry or fix herself something.
When your kids get older, your idea sounds great.
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TheQueenOfChaos
by Gold Member on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:30 PM
1 mom liked this

My mom did this to teach me life lessons, not as a punishment. I think if you make it a form of punishment it will hinder her enjoyment of cooking later in life.

Once a week my mom gave me free reign of the kitchen. I could follow a recipe or just make my own. I really learned to fall in love with food that way. I spent every week looking forward to my cooking night.

Now I love doing it. I cook new things all the time, even things I don't think I would like. And I usually find out, that if I make it the right way, I LOVE it.

For me this would be more of a fun and bonding experience than one for punishment.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:30 PM
I guess if I shouldn't be parenting then I shouldn't be making them dinner for them either. And it's not like I'm spending all my waking energy trying to "parent" her. But in the meantime, she is downright disrespectful to me. I don't let people walk all over me.


Quoting Anonymous:

Yes you are supposed to let it go she's not your child and it's not your house,  you should be worrying about getting a place of your own not parenting other people's children!  I'm not saying she's in the right but it's not your place to teach her lessons!


Quoting Anonymous:

I know $20 isn't hard to do. That's not the point. The point is to show her how much work is put into feeding a household of 7. So that maybe she would appreciate it more.



And she does this often! About a lot of things. I am supposed to just let it go?





Quoting Anonymous:

It's not your child,  it's not your home,  just let it go!  And $20 for one dinner isn't that hard to do!





tkp003
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:30 PM

My dad did that to me (my mom cannot cook very well) anyway he told me to make meal plans for the week and had me cook everyday for a week lets say i didn't bitch anymore about the food i just kept quite and picked out what i didn't want to eat. 

RobsPrincess24
by ThePrincess on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:31 PM

Yes, I would talk to her mother about it. My SD told me before she didn't like something I was making. I told her that she should be the one to work full time, clean the house, get DH off to work, feed the dog, do the laundry, take her places, plan out the dinner menu, do the shopping, and then make dinner. She shut up real quick. LOL. I wasn't complaining about doing all those things, I really don't mind it, but when she said she didn't like what I was making it irritated me. Haha.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:31 PM
Good idea!! How do I do that? Lol


Quoting Anonymous:

It's a nice thought, but I doubt it would work because she isn't your kid, it would be impossible to force. It also sounds like she has little respect for other people, something that is next to impossible to fix at this age. She should have been taught years ago.


I'd try a very subtle, almost passive aggressive approach to get her to figure it out without anyone else noticing your doing it. It will drive her nuts and hopeful she'll learn something.  


mommie2twogirls
by on Jan. 8, 2013 at 5:33 PM

sounds good to me

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