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why do you think it is so easy now?

Posted by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 12:57 PM
  • 14 Replies

i was having this conversation the other day that it seems so casual and okay to get divorced or be a single parent in our modern day society. I am not saying that it isnt okay, i personally couldnt care less what other people do and it isnt hurting anyone.

But just 50 years ago, getting divorced was HIGHELY frowned upon. you wouldnt just get a divorce if your husband called you a bitch, hell you probably wouldnt even get a divorce if you found out your husband was playing with his secretary! it had to be an EXTREME case to actually get divorced.

Same goes for having a child out of wedlock. 50 years ago people would rush to get married and then spin a tale about how they must have gotten pregnant on their wedding night or how the baby came a little "early", or something along those lines. Or the woman would go "visit" a relative out of town for awhile, have the baby, give it up for adoption, and then come home. 

yet, here we are today, and people get divorced all the time. lots of times not even for major reasons. they are just sick of being married to each other. People actually PLAN to have kid's out of wedlock. (no judging, my first born was born out of wedlock and both of my parents have been married and divorced twice or more). I was just wondering when this all became so casual and something we just shrugged our shoulders at?

do you think it is a good thing we are so open-minded now? or do you think it is a bad thing and we have lost our values?

Proud mom of an ornery 3 year old boy, a very smart 6 year old girl! Married for 4.5 years, together for 7! Fun loving, open-minded, eco-friendly, creative,friendly, different strokes work for different folks, lady! I stay at home, work at home, love it all!


by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 12:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
jillbailey26
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 12:59 PM
1 mom liked this

I think it's because women were taught to put up with anything and everything.  Then there weren't as many opportunities for women, making it harder for them to be on their own.  

Now, we have the same opportunities as men are are raised to not put up with their crap.  Making it easier to break away from or not marry at all.


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19

SalemWitchChild
by Blessed be on Jan. 14, 2013 at 12:59 PM

We haven't lost our values we've just changed them. I personally think its better that a woman can openly have a child out of wedlock and no one blinks an eye.

I'd rather people be divorced and happy than married and miserable.

mommaoftwo
by Silver Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:01 PM

I think we are just evolving as a society. ( In some ways for the good, and some ways for the bad)

We are going from arranged marriages, where adultery was very common, to people splitting if they don't get along.


Mommy of FIVE!!!



Tara~12.16.03  Zachary~5.17.05  Rowan~1.17.09  Willow~8/10/11 Baby~ EDA 1/27/13

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:03 PM

There are a lot of things that have become readily accepted in our current time, that were ostracized many years ago. We will always be evolving to accommodate our ever changing society. I don't think being open minded has to equal losing values. Our values have just changed along with our open mindedness. Too many goods come from having diverse families and diverse values, that even some of the consequences that come from being more accepting don't outweigh the good.

ExpectingAubri
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:04 PM
Mostly bad.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
danie24
by Ruby Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:06 PM

I think it's wonderful that women no longer feel that they have to stay with someone who makes them unhappy or abuses them..

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:08 PM

I think it's sad we have lost our values. It has become too easy for men not to take resposibilty for thier children because of this and to never settle down with the mother to raise thier kids in a stable environment. Then there are the people who divorce and remarry several times and have several kids by diffrent fathers/mothers. What are we teaching our kids here by these examples of having babies casually and divorcing so readily? Our society is becoming a very scary place.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:08 PM

I do agree that our society has just changed...evolved...yeah.    I too agree that if the parents are unhappy together, then they should divorce, grow up and still be good parents to their child.   Also, it seems that many people  don't take marriage seriously enough (with the attitude they can always get divorced).  No, a woman doesn't need a husband, but I do believe children are emotionally healthier if they have a mother and father (or father figure) in their lives.  

aponder
by Bronze Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:10 PM

I think people marry too quickly with the idea that if it don't work they can just get a divorce.  I do think we have lost some of our values, but I also think,  that it is good that women are being taught to get out of abusive relationships, and there is more help now for when a woman chooses to do that.  The reason I say we are losing our values is because of our ideas about sex.  I was watching Loveline a long time ago and the idea was if  you were 21 and were still a virgin you were considered odd, we still though will critisize someone who has sex at 16 and gets pregnant, to me that is confusing.  Your darned if you do and darned if you don't. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 1:13 PM
Im 24 and dont believe in divorce. I saw it too much growing up. Im with an amazing and faithful man who doesnt believe in divorce. In fact we were just talking about this lol. In some cases nowadays there is abuse=(
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