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does anyone else...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 19 Replies
Does anyone else feel like they wish they could go back to when they first started dating their SO before falling In love. Me and my SO relationship is just not working well and always arguing about everything and I wish I could go back 2 years and not ever be with him because I don't feel like he loves me. Always putting me down and telling me he is or was talking to other girls while being with me especially at the beginning of pur relationship. Anyone else wish they could have seen the future and decide to be with the person or not. I love my daughter and I have one on the way but I just wish I had chosen a different life for my daughter because all the hate between us is being seen by my daughter and its not healthy. My SO also said during one fight when he left the only reason he was here still was because of our daughter. Sometimes I wish he would just get into trouble and go to jail or die and I have never wished so much bad things on one person ans I feel guilty but I can't change how I feel.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:41 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:42 PM
Sadly, yes. I was looking so hard for someone that would love me that I forced myself to love the first person I thought loved me. 7 years & 2 kiddos later, I'm miserable. But I've been a sahm for so long, that it would require me working 3 jobs to support us & my kids are still relativly young. I feel trapped & regret my decision almost daily.
Stacey2506
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:43 PM

Well you are not married to this guy. You can leave him at any point.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:47 PM
I would leave. He obviously wont so do the right thing by your kids and leave
Brandyns87
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:47 PM

I wish my children's father and I had moved more slowly. We rushed into things. We were living together when we hardly knew one another. I think we would still be together if we hadn't moved so fast. Do you worry that your daughter will date men who treat her badly, since that's what she sees?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:50 PM
This is the prime example of someone not waiting to make a very grown up decision (having a child) with someone they hardly know. Considering you already have 1 and you have only been with him for 2 years, I would venture to say you got prego pretty early into the relationship.
I would get out before you get pregnant with a 3rd.
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sampson200
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:51 PM

No, we DO wish we had met each other earlier, though.

We both had some bad boyfriends/girlfriends that scarred us a bit/a lot in our 20s.

We met when we were 28 and 29.

I CAN tell you, OP, that at times we struggled, a lot, a WHOLE lot, in trying to figure out and understand each other and you have to learn to talk to a spouse; not everyone gels easily and never fight or get angry. That is really rare.

And people do say things they don't mean during fights; it's when you learn to communicate better that you learn to fight.

You both sound like a young couple that doesn't trust each other.

It can take a long time, or never, for that to smooth itself out.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:53 PM
I'm a sahm also. She's almost nine months and I've seen a friend to actually talk to twice in a little over a year. One was my baby shower and the other his birthday. I'm okay with that but then he goes out to play poker as far as he tells me and tells me to just go and have fun with a friend yet I have yo walk a mile to the bus take a few and see a friend for maybe an hour and take the bus home and walk back home with all her stuff needed and a stroller. I breastfeed and my daughter will cry til she pukes if she is not with me at the moment because she is teething. I don't see the point in all that for just an hour of possibly seeing a friend. I am close to actually hating him but I love him. Doesn't make sense but it's the only way to describe it

Quoting Anonymous:

Sadly, yes. I was looking so hard for someone that would love me that I forced myself to love the first person I thought loved me. 7 years & 2 kiddos later, I'm miserable. But I've been a sahm for so long, that it would require me working 3 jobs to support us & my kids are still relativly young. I feel trapped & regret my decision almost daily.
Sassy762
by CAFE SASSY HBIC on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:53 PM

Look into Marriage Counseling...asap

But to answer the question.....NO. We are divorced BUT if I hadn't been with him in the first palce I wouldn't have the children I have now. 

louzannalady
by Gold Member on Jan. 14, 2013 at 4:54 PM

There is help available. http://www.thehotline.org/ or you can call 1-800-799-7233, if you do not have a way of accessing that site without him knowing you did. 

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