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Sad POS post, edit because I was right!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 39 Replies

Ugh! I am getting so frustrated with my fiance's ex! I am not saying this true about all the bio momma's cause I am one myself, but some of them make me so freaking angry and sick to my stomach. WHY do you want to use the children as a weapon to hurt the guy, because he hurt you years ago when yall were teenagers?? How sad is that, for your child to grow up under your influence and actually believe that their REAL father is some kind of dead beat drug addict, when I have been with him for almost two years and he is the most wonderful father to MY kids, and he is responsible and doing everything in his power to right his wrongs! He wants his boys back in his life so badly, and now you are just going to rip him of his rights with your lies like its something that you ENJOY! I just want so badly to butt in and tell this bitch a thing or two, but what good will that do? None, it will prob make it worse. So here I am, rambling to a bunch of other women like it will help at al!!
I am not in the mood to even try to look on any bright side. I hate that she is doing this, and it isn't my battle so wtf am I supposed to do but watch him go down??


Edit, to all the ladies who thought they knew all about a situation they aren't even remotely involved in: I finally had a little talk/argument with the chick. She kept telling me I thought I knew it all, but I had no idea about the truth, so I finally told her, then freakin tell me what it was that was so damn horrible???
She said he cheated? They were in a bad fight, he said some hurtful things and left to a buddy's house to have a little time to himself to think. The next day the guy tells him he wants to go to Floridia and asks my SO to come along, and he made a mistake when he went with his friends instead of coming back home to her. She took off with the kids, and everything else is as I said before. I don't know where the cheating came into play, she didn't say too much about that at all, just that "once a cheater always a cheater". She wrote a poem about it and put it public on her FB so I could read it. It did sound pretty hurtful, but all this is not the way to handle it! She is nothing but a bitter ex!

I would post the poem, but Idk if I am allowed to do that?

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:19 PM

BUMP!

BEXi
by BEXi on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:21 PM

What has your SO done in order to get the rights he deserves? Is there anything court ordered?

                                                         
                                          
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:33 PM


Quoting BEXi:

What has your SO done in order to get the rights he deserves? Is there anything court ordered?

They got pregnant with twins  when he was 17, and not too long after he and her got in a fight about some bs, and he took off with his friends to Florida and got arrested while he was down there, and by the time he got back she was long gone with the kids. Stupid mistake at a young age, but things are different now. He is 22 now, and when he confided in me about it all when we started dating, it was clear he wanted to fix things. So far he has gone to parenting classes, anger management assessment and drug/alcohol assessment which he didn't have to take classes for, we have been talking to a lawyer but we just can't afford one right now, not to mention she lives in another state so our broke asses can only do so much. and she just sprung this court date for three weeks from now before we had a chance to follow through on all these plans we had! CS, was getting caught up too. The hearing is for her new husband to adopt the boys and take SO's rights away in the process, and the lawyer said they have a good case even with everything we have done. I just don't know what to do.

BEXi
by BEXi on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:38 PM

Sounds like they are able to do this successfully because your SO tehcnically abandoned them. How long was he in Florida before he started trying to be a Father to his children again? The whole 5 years?

Im not sure what the laws are where you are from.. but it sounds like he is a little too late.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting BEXi:

What has your SO done in order to get the rights he deserves? Is there anything court ordered?

They got pregnant with twins  when he was 17, and not too long after he and her got in a fight about some bs, and he took off with his friends to Florida and got arrested while he was down there, and by the time he got back she was long gone with the kids. Stupid mistake at a young age, but things are different now. He is 22 now, and when he confided in me about it all when we started dating, it was clear he wanted to fix things. So far he has gone to parenting classes, anger management assessment and drug/alcohol assessment which he didn't have to take classes for, we have been talking to a lawyer but we just can't afford one right now, not to mention she lives in another state so our broke asses can only do so much. and she just sprung this court date for three weeks from now before we had a chance to follow through on all these plans we had! CS, was getting caught up too. The hearing is for her new husband to adopt the boys and take SO's rights away in the process, and the lawyer said they have a good case even with everything we have done. I just don't know what to do.


                                                         
                                          
                                   Money Hungry Mommy Blog

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:49 PM

He was only there for a week. He didn't move there, he just went with some friends and was coming back. He tried to work things out with her right after, he gave her cs and saw the boys on a weekly basis, but they couldn't stop fighting and finally she wouldn't allow him to see them anymore, she is bi bolar and wouldn't just accept an apology. She still won't. He made bad choices, we are aware of that, but he has grown up since then and wants his boys back in his life, the last time he saw them was right before thier second birthday. And he didn't abandon them. He continued paying CS but over time he kept falling behind a little at a time, but in the last two years we have almost got it caught up. No he hasn't filed for any visitation yet because she will fight it, and we can't afford a lawer yet, we were trying to work on CS first. But you are probably right, its too freaking late.

Quoting BEXi:

Sounds like they are able to do this successfully because your SO tehcnically abandoned them. How long was he in Florida before he started trying to be a Father to his children again? The whole 5 years?

Im not sure what the laws are where you are from.. but it sounds like he is a little too late.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting BEXi:

What has your SO done in order to get the rights he deserves? Is there anything court ordered?

They got pregnant with twins  when he was 17, and not too long after he and her got in a fight about some bs, and he took off with his friends to Florida and got arrested while he was down there, and by the time he got back she was long gone with the kids. Stupid mistake at a young age, but things are different now. He is 22 now, and when he confided in me about it all when we started dating, it was clear he wanted to fix things. So far he has gone to parenting classes, anger management assessment and drug/alcohol assessment which he didn't have to take classes for, we have been talking to a lawyer but we just can't afford one right now, not to mention she lives in another state so our broke asses can only do so much. and she just sprung this court date for three weeks from now before we had a chance to follow through on all these plans we had! CS, was getting caught up too. The hearing is for her new husband to adopt the boys and take SO's rights away in the process, and the lawyer said they have a good case even with everything we have done. I just don't know what to do.



stickyfingers
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:54 PM
idk...it sounds like a lot of bad crap happened before you came into the picture. i dont use my kids as pawns...i hate my ex but he is their dad and i do everything i can to encourage their relationship. even if the bastard is a fucking liar and abused my oldest son (who was from a previous relationship) i dont say anything negative about him to the kids. does yours have visitation or and court orders?
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 7:56 PM
Sadly it's not just the moms that do it. :( My ex uses my son as a weapon against me. You just have to do the best you can, keep fighting and hope that either you get custody or when they turn 18 they will be ready to hear the truth.
boldrumble
by on Jan. 14, 2013 at 8:00 PM
Was he a deadbeat drug addict? I have to say...if my ex came back now and said he changed...i wouldnt believe.it and i would try to take his rights away. Sometimes iy isnt because of "her hurting him" but rather her protecting her children.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 14, 2013 at 8:06 PM
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You said he is the most wonderful father to MY kids, and is responsible and doing everyhing in his power to right his wrongs...That to me sends red flags because You are aware he was the opposite with her and their kids. As a Bio mom I can't speak for her but  know I do not want my DD to know her father at this point because he was a horrible father..He now has a new family and is apparently the best father/spouse according to her but your word doesnt erase the past..what YOU have to say does not erase the damage he has done. Does that make sense? You can cry all u want that he has trasnsformed from Mr horrible to Mr wonderful..its not going to make 2 cents differenc if HIS actions dont back it up. In my case the other gf DID try to talk to me and what she was under the impression of knowing wasnt the truth. he was telling her how he loved our DD, wanted to see our DD, missed her, asked to see her,HE NEVER HAS!! Even in court I GAVE HIM visitation because HE STATED HE DIDNT WANT TO SEE HER. He told his new gf he begged to get her..Their are always two sides to every story and the only way you are going to know the truth is if you get them both together in the same room to discuss these issues. And dont go by texts or emais..Coz a smooth liar will delete the truth from his end and only show you what he wants you to see to keep you around and get the sympathy he craves.. Dont pass judgement onto her until you know the problem is solely her and to you because you love him it is her..Take the blinders down and see..thats my advice..

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 14, 2013 at 8:10 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting boldrumble:

Was he a deadbeat drug addict? I have to say...if my ex came back now and said he changed...i wouldnt believe.it and i would try to take his rights away. Sometimes iy isnt because of "her hurting him" but rather her protecting her children.

He was never a dead beat, he did what he could to help her financially and he was always there untill she cut him out. I didn't find all this out by him either , his mother told me a lot of what happened, and so did his cousin who was his exes best friend untill she started doing all this. I know there are two sides to every story, I know he hurt her and it was messed up what he did, and I have never been angry with this girl before because I figured she might of had her reasons and we would do things the legal way. But this is too much, she knows he is not a bad person, and she doesn't even know how much better he is doing now. He was never a drug addict btw, they both smoked pot until she got pregnant and he quit because she had to. And when he was arrested he was drunk, not high.

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