Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

If you and/or your child has ADD/ADHA I need your help.

Posted by   + Show Post

 To start off no I have not been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD but I did take a questionnaire and was told there is a strong possibility that I do suffer from ADHD. I really believe I have this condition. Growing up I had a really hard time in school. I had trouble concentrating in school and almost NEVER stayed on task. I would just space out and look around the room. If I read something I couldn't even tell you what I just read.

I didn't do much homework but when I did I would not turn it in. I knew something was wrong with me but I didn't know what. My teachers would just count me as a lazy student that was smart if I applied myself. How can I apply myself if I can't focus? I still have these issues today and it did affect my job.

Another thing that is causing me more problems now is my memory. I thought I was losing my memory because I was (still am) trying to suppress bad memories that happened to me when I was younger. I found out that people with ADD/ADHD also have memory problems as well as the other problems I have.

My daughter is going through this too. She is 5 but already I see a lot of the problems I have she has too. She even has the speech problems (she is in speech therapy) I had growing up. All I could think was "Oh God not her too". Because I see myself in her I want to get everything I can done for her to help her out. In the mean time I will also be getting help for myself and we will go through this together.

OK now my question, What do I do after we are diagnosed?How can I help her and help myself?What medication should I stay away from? What can I expect from her and myself if we are put on medication? I of course I will ask the doctor the same questions but I want to hear it from someone that goes through this.

I'm almost to tears because I didn't get help at all growing up, except for speech. Just like I knew something was wrong with me I knew something was wrong with her too. I got her tested by the BOE and she wasn't delayed enough for services other than speech. It makes me so mad because NOW they want to test her again because they see she needs help after I've been telling them this all along.

I'm kind of scared because I don't know what to expect. All I want is for her to be successful.

I'm sorry this post is all over the place but I had to get this off my chest and get some help from you all.

Thanks for the advice in advance!!

 

 Marriedin love Mother of two boy n girl and one on the wayexpecting girl

by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:05 PM
Replies (21-30):
momwith2monkeys
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:39 PM

 this, with my son i went to his pediatrician and he referred us to a  therapist who ended up being his behavior therapist for a few years. He is the one who diagnosed my son with adhd and ODD. they will give you a questionnaire, actually 2 of them, one is for you to fill out and the other is for her teacher to fill out and they will go from there.  the Pediatrician is where to start.

 

Quoting AngeLnChainZ:

Start with her pediatrician, get a referral for a therapist who specializes in pediatrics and go from there..

Quoting tastelikeyum:

 Right now she goes to headstart but the BOE is trying to step in to get her more help now. For the most part is it mainly the schools that help out or support groups? I really have no clue.

Quoting Pooobaihr:

As for your daughter, try looking for a place that specialize in working with children with this disorder. 

No Idea what to do for you.

 


 

baquick
by Ruby Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:41 PM
Drink caffeine. If you are able to concentrate better then there ya go. Caffeine has pretty much the opposite effect in people with ADHD than those without it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
tastelikeyum
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:41 PM

 Thank you!! I didn't know that you could treat this without medication. Do doctors not make a referral for this?

Quoting AngeLnChainZ:

All of that needs to be addressed with someone who specializes in ADHD, most of the time pediatricians are not the best options as they most of time just want to throw them on meds and say to hell with it. Every child is different, what works for one child may not work for another (My son has been on multiple meds, with varying dosings along the way  to find one that was just right.) ALso keep in mind, she may not even need medication even if she is diagnosed ADHD- There are diet changes, therapies, and plenty of other things that can be done before you resort to medication (And ultimately it should be the last resort)

 

 Marriedin love Mother of two boy n girl and one on the wayexpecting girl

momwith2monkeys
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:45 PM

  Just because a person has ADHD does not mean that they are not intelligent or have bad behavior or lazy. i  hate it when people say that people who have adhd are not intelligent because from what i have learned with having 2 kids who have adhd is the children with adhd are extremely smart. My son  was getting B even when he was spending 3 out of 5 days at home because of his behavior is school.  and when he is in school everyday he makes straight A's except for in writing and that is only because he has trouble with the motor function in his hands and has always had trouble writing and just learn how to tie his shoes a year ago and he is almost 10.

Quoting LDennany:

I have ADHD and what you described was to the T how I was in high school. People can tell you what medications to stay away from but that won't help you. All people are wired different what works for some people may not work for others. I didn't get a good medication regimen until I was a senior on high school. My grades went from straight F's to straight A's that year.

I, however, have a killer memory and I pay super close attention to detail. I haven't been medicated for my ADHD since I turned 18. It's rumored that some people can grow out of ADHD. I don't believe this to be true. I think I just learned how to grow into it and made it work for me. People may find it strange. I study better when the T.V. I'd on and the kids are running around or in busy areas at my school.

The MOST important thing you can do is educate yourself. Research medications and other "suggested" treatments. Help your child to learn how to manage it and make it work for them. Don't let it be an excuse for behavior or lack of work. Just because a person has ADHD does not mean that they are not intelligent or have bad behavior or lazy. Talk to your child teachers and figure out a plan when it comes to homework and it getting completed and turned in.

I still have my 'issues" but in the grand scheme of things, I function just fine. Be your child's greatest advocate!

 

AngeLnChainZ
by Silver Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:46 PM

Some pediatricians will try to treat in office, but most of the time they aren't really qualified to do much more than dispense medication and ADHD children need therapy time, and far more than just to be thrown on meds and sent on their way. My son was involved in play therapy for 2 years before we medicated and I also followed a fairly strict diet with him. Limit the processed foods, sugars, and avoid any and all dyes (Red Dyes are the worst) . You would be surprised at how many every day items have these things in them. Read all food, drink, and medication labels carefully!

Quoting tastelikeyum:

 Thank you!! I didn't know that you could treat this without medication. Do doctors not make a referral for this?

Quoting AngeLnChainZ:

All of that needs to be addressed with someone who specializes in ADHD, most of the time pediatricians are not the best options as they most of time just want to throw them on meds and say to hell with it. Every child is different, what works for one child may not work for another (My son has been on multiple meds, with varying dosings along the way  to find one that was just right.) ALso keep in mind, she may not even need medication even if she is diagnosed ADHD- There are diet changes, therapies, and plenty of other things that can be done before you resort to medication (And ultimately it should be the last resort)

 


                                                      Fire13Life

   

                                  

    

AngeLnChainZ
by Silver Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:47 PM

Yes! My son is extremely smart and can do anything he wants to do is just getting him to be able to focus to do it!

Quoting momwith2monkeys:

  Just because a person has ADHD does not mean that they are not intelligent or have bad behavior or lazy. i  hate it when people say that people who have adhd are not intelligent because from what i have learned with having 2 kids who have adhd is the children with adhd are extremely smart. My son  was getting B even when he was spending 3 out of 5 days at home because of his behavior is school.  and when he is in school everyday he makes straight A's except for in writing and that is only because he has trouble with the motor function in his hands and has always had trouble writing and just learn how to tie his shoes a year ago and he is almost 10.

Quoting LDennany:

I have ADHD and what you described was to the T how I was in high school. People can tell you what medications to stay away from but that won't help you. All people are wired different what works for some people may not work for others. I didn't get a good medication regimen until I was a senior on high school. My grades went from straight F's to straight A's that year.

I, however, have a killer memory and I pay super close attention to detail. I haven't been medicated for my ADHD since I turned 18. It's rumored that some people can grow out of ADHD. I don't believe this to be true. I think I just learned how to grow into it and made it work for me. People may find it strange. I study better when the T.V. I'd on and the kids are running around or in busy areas at my school.

The MOST important thing you can do is educate yourself. Research medications and other "suggested" treatments. Help your child to learn how to manage it and make it work for them. Don't let it be an excuse for behavior or lack of work. Just because a person has ADHD does not mean that they are not intelligent or have bad behavior or lazy. Talk to your child teachers and figure out a plan when it comes to homework and it getting completed and turned in.

I still have my 'issues" but in the grand scheme of things, I function just fine. Be your child's greatest advocate!

 


                                                      Fire13Life

   

                                  

    

tastelikeyum
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:47 PM

 Thank you so much!! I believe she has ADHD. She is hyper and its hard to get her to focus. When she is seated and having one on one interaction she is easily distracted. Did your kids seem sluggish after taking the meds? I know my brother was on Ritalin and it made him so different that his teacher begged my mom to take him off. His teacher would rather deal with him hyper than not active at all.

Quoting momwith2monkeys:

both of my children have adhd. I believe i had it growing up but never diagnosed with it. After my oldest got diagnosed is when i figured out i had it too. I have learn to control it over the years and can force my to stay on task and focus. The type of meds will depend on your child. The doctor will start her out on a low dosage and work her up to what will help her. She is 5 so i figure she is probably in k. After you get the diagnosed go to the school and start the process of getting her an IEP, that will help her in school. It can take a while to get the IEP. MY daughter ( my oldest) i have never had to get an IEP but my son has and IEP and it took me from K til he was in 2rd grade to finally get it going. They will probably switch her meds too until the find the right one for her. I personally don't like Ritalin, concerta, focilan. My son had terrible side effect with those and cause him to develop tic. I perfer Vyvanse or Adderall. Both of my kids are on Vyvanse and my son also take adderall at 1 pm at school. ALso you can looking into non stimilants. My daughter take Vyvanse and intuniv in the morning. Intuniv is a non stimilant and it help keep her focus in school. You may not see any affect at first but as the meds start getting into her system you will see the affect of them. Just don't let them give her to high of a dosage. Pm anytimes if you have any question. MY daughter is 13 and was diagnosed at age 5 and my son is 9 almost 10 and was diagnosed at age 5. do you think she has adhd or just add?

 

 Marriedin love Mother of two boy n girl and one on the wayexpecting girl

Axlynnx
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:48 PM

Oops hit the anon button before!


Your welcome. I think as long as you stay active, keep learning, reading whatever you like to do to keep your mind going you'll be fine :) I always like to do those memory type games to keep my mind active. Sounds lame but it helps. I'm only 25 but some days I feel like I have the mind of a 90 year old. So since I stopped my medication I tend to take advantage of every learning opportunity I come across. I've noticed I've been reading books so much more since I stopped my medication. Wen I was younger I was never on medication and when it came to school I'd only get good grades in a class if it was one that interested me. If it was something I was not interested in then I mentally checked out and paid next to no attention. So maybe ifyr child is having a similar situation just help them find things that interest them to keep them focused in school. Good luck :)

Quoting tastelikeyum:

 Thank you so much. I do keep a big calendar on my fridge and write everything down. Even if I do something the day before that was not on my calendar I have to write it down, although that event has passed. I really don't want me or my daughter to take meds but I thought that was the only way to treat it, or at least control it.

Quoting Anonymous:

I have it. I was taking medications for it for the past few years but stopped taking it a few months ago. It helped me focus a lt but if I forgot to take it I'd go through withdraw. I hated felling dependent on it so I weaned myself off of it and just function without meds. Plus i learned it affects your health later on inlife if your taking adderall. Sure I forget things and am easily distracted but if I concentrate on focusing I manage just fine. I also tend to keep myself busy and write notes on things I need to remember which helps. It's something you just learn to adjust to. It's not a " disability " unless you allow yourself to live like it is. Take control of it don't let it take control of you.

 


WithHope
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:49 PM
We control my daughters through diet & routine. So far she's well adjusted and successful!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
momwith2monkeys
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:49 PM
there are other ways to treat it sometimes it works and sometimes it don't. Both of my kids have it and i have tired the not medicating and it didn't work. behavior therapy is one thing you can do for your daughter, changing her diet and i haver heard that there are natural stuff you can give her that will help. I have also heard giving your kid coffee work well, with my son it didn't help him but he also has ODD so that might have been the reason why.
Quoting tastelikeyum:

 Thank you so much. I do keep a big calendar on my fridge and write everything down. Even if I do something the day before that was not on my calendar I have to write it down, although that event has passed. I really don't want me or my daughter to take meds but I thought that was the only way to treat it, or at least control it.

Quoting Anonymous:

I have it. I was taking medications for it for the past few years but stopped taking it a few months ago. It helped me focus a lt but if I forgot to take it I'd go through withdraw. I hated felling dependent on it so I weaned myself off of it and just function without meds. Plus i learned it affects your health later on inlife if your taking adderall. Sure I forget things and am easily distracted but if I concentrate on focusing I manage just fine. I also tend to keep myself busy and write notes on things I need to remember which helps. It's something you just learn to adjust to. It's not a " disability " unless you allow yourself to live like it is. Take control of it don't let it take control of you.

 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)