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Just an fyi, you bitches can't have it both fucking ways!





You can't say a sm has to love her stepchildren, treat them as their own and care for them, then say they have no right to opinions or input. Bottom line is your kids lives often affect the stepmothers life as well. Stepmoms have a right to "call the shots" in what affects their lives. They have a right to say what goes on in their homes. Don't like it? Too damn bad.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 17, 2013 at 11:54 AM
Replies (81-90):
SnapIt
by Ruby Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 12:58 PM

I am the BM and my ex has moved on and the other day I got a letter from his SO thanking me for being the way I am. Letting her spend time with the kids. yadda yadda

I wrote back it was no problem and how much fun the kids had with her yadda yadda.

its for the kids we all need to get along for and sometimes all parties need to bite their tongues. life is not perfect and we will come to a bump im sure, but we all need to act maturely and understand that sometimes the decisions we make as mothers isnt always right either.

Quoting puertoricangeek:

If only every BM and SM were like you two the world would be a nicer place. My BM and SM didn't get along until I was out of the picture, got married, and moved away. Now thwy are best friends.

Quoting reaandiziesmama:

I love my sons step mom. He lives with them and she is wonderful about keeping me up to date about everything. She loves him as her own but has never tried to take my place. I am super grateful he has her.



PaperClip811
by Silver Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:01 PM
1 mom liked this

 I agree with you, actually. Im a BM. I almost exclusively deal with the SM and have for about 2.5 years. Anytime we disagree people are so quick to tell me "stop talking to her" or "it's none of her business" but, even though we butt heads about stuff, she actually COMMUNICATES, (unlike his father) and wants to do right by DS.

I'm probably way more of a pushover that I should be, with her... but I am glad he has a SM that loves him, I deal with the bullshit so he can be happy.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 22 on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:03 PM

 i'm not trying to be rude, it's just a question, if you have no desire to be their mother or wanted more kids why would anyone marry a man who did?

Quoting Anonymous:

I have zero desire to be their mother. I have my own children tyvm. If I wanted to be mommy to more, I would have more. But I don't.

So if I'm nothing I suppose its safe to say you'd prefer your kids be excluded, not cared for, ignored, and not dealt with. Right?

Quoting mary841108:

you are nothing to those children than the other woman that married their dad that is it. your say and opinions are very limited. You do not have custody of those children, you didnt give birth to them. if you want to play mommy and make decisions then have your own kids and leave your husbands children alone. thank god my husband and I are still married because there would be some major issues. get over yourself you are not those childrens mother


Quoting Anonymous:

And you'd be in jail. Must suck to be so self defeating b


Quoting mary841108:


 well thankfully my kids dont have a step mother because if she acted like you bitch would be getting knocked the fuck out.


 

 

puertoricangeek
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:03 PM
1 mom liked this

Exactly, be civil and cordial around the kids, say nothing to the "man" and talk shit around your freinds. Do not mention anything to your kids. That is the way I feel. The children deserve everyone to love and care about them without feeling like they have to pick sides of keep secrets.

Quoting SnapIt:

I am the BM and my ex has moved on and the other day I got a letter from his SO thanking me for being the way I am. Letting her spend time with the kids. yadda yadda

I wrote back it was no problem and how much fun the kids had with her yadda yadda.

its for the kids we all need to get along for and sometimes all parties need to bite their tongues. life is not perfect and we will come to a bump im sure, but we all need to act maturely and understand that sometimes the decisions we make as mothers isnt always right either.

Quoting puertoricangeek:

If only every BM and SM were like you two the world would be a nicer place. My BM and SM didn't get along until I was out of the picture, got married, and moved away. Now thwy are best friends.

Quoting reaandiziesmama:

I love my sons step mom. He lives with them and she is wonderful about keeping me up to date about everything. She loves him as her own but has never tried to take my place. I am super grateful he has her.




Plus Sized and Pregnant
www.cafemom.com/groups/118326
Anonymous
by Anonymous 23 on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:04 PM
I agree to a point. My DSS' mother has nothing to do with him & he calls me "mom". So I basically set the rules & standards for him & my DH has no problem with that.
WifeyC
by Platinum Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:05 PM


Marrying a man with children doesn't make you a mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

 i'm not trying to be rude, it's just a question, if you have no desire to be their mother or wanted more kids why would anyone marry a man who did?

Quoting Anonymous:

I have zero desire to be their mother. I have my own children tyvm. If I wanted to be mommy to more, I would have more. But I don't.

So if I'm nothing I suppose its safe to say you'd prefer your kids be excluded, not cared for, ignored, and not dealt with. Right?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 24 on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:05 PM


Quoting brebugmom91:

I agree.

I'm not a stepmom, nor do my kids don't have a stepmom, but its common sense. BM can not dictate other peoples lives.

If only the world thought like you.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 24 on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:06 PM


Quoting WifeyC:


Marrying a man with children doesn't make you a mother.

Quoting Anonymous:

 i'm not trying to be rude, it's just a question, if you have no desire to be their mother or wanted more kids why would anyone marry a man who did?

Quoting Anonymous:

I have zero desire to be their mother. I have my own children tyvm. If I wanted to be mommy to more, I would have more. But I don't.

So if I'm nothing I suppose its safe to say you'd prefer your kids be excluded, not cared for, ignored, and not dealt with. Right?

Wow, just wow.

puertoricangeek
by on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:06 PM

I agree with you on this. Everyone has to be adults and look at all possible outcomes. If you devorce the guy there is a possibility that he will get married and visa-versa. If you are marrying a man that already has kids expect for there to be "baby mama drama" but be adults about it.

Quoting Anonymous:

 i'm not trying to be rude, it's just a question, if you have no desire to be their mother or wanted more kids why would anyone marry a man who did?

Quoting Anonymous:

I have zero desire to be their mother. I have my own children tyvm. If I wanted to be mommy to more, I would have more. But I don't.

So if I'm nothing I suppose its safe to say you'd prefer your kids be excluded, not cared for, ignored, and not dealt with. Right?

Quoting mary841108:

you are nothing to those children than the other woman that married their dad that is it. your say and opinions are very limited. You do not have custody of those children, you didnt give birth to them. if you want to play mommy and make decisions then have your own kids and leave your husbands children alone. thank god my husband and I are still married because there would be some major issues. get over yourself you are not those childrens mother


Quoting Anonymous:

And you'd be in jail. Must suck to be so self defeating b


Quoting mary841108:


 well thankfully my kids dont have a step mother because if she acted like you bitch would be getting knocked the fuck out.


 

 


Plus Sized and Pregnant
www.cafemom.com/groups/118326
GLO682
by Silver Member on Jan. 17, 2013 at 1:07 PM

 I agree to a certain extent. i think as long as the step mom doesn't overstep her boundaries.

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