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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

He left me

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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Well basic run down, husband left me and the kids.  He took all the money when he left.  I was supposed to go from being part time to full time, but they are only giving my 35hrs a week. 

So I am running out of options.  I finally decided that I am not getting back on my feet as soon as I hope so I sought out to get help.  I filed for food stamps online.  I decided to go with a phone interview instead of taking all three kids in out in the cold.. plus I needed to conserve gas.  Lately we had been living off of roman soup, rice beans and bread.  But for this extended stay motel they expect me to pay in advance.  So I don't know how I am going to by food.  so I was really counting on the help.

I was sent a letter stating that I will be receiving a call from a case worker on the 15th between 9:45-10:45a.  I mad sure my eyes were on that phone the whole time. At 10:50 I did not receive a call, so I called them.  They sent me directly to the case worker.  And it seemed like everything went fine.  She said I needed to come up there and bring my ID.  I asked if I needed to bring anything else, like SS cards and birth certificates for myself and the kids, she said no just my ID.  So I loaded the kids up, and sat at the office for over 3 hrs.  It was horrible, the kids were getting restless, they were hungry, I was hungry.  But I didn't have anyone to watch them.  So we finally get called back.  The case worker goes over everything with me.. takes my ID.  Then gave me the cars and told me how much I would be getting.  She said I can expect the money in 24 hrs.  I was so excited.  I thought about how great it was to go to the store and actually get to buy some groceries.  You don't now what a great feeling that is, when you are hungry.  I thought about how I was going to treat my kids and make them a nice pot roast and potatoes for dinner.  Its been a while sense we had a nice meal.

So the next day I got to check the card, still nothing.  I thought maybe it needs a few more hrs.  So I called later on.  Still nothing.  I called the office, it was closed.  I searched everywhere for some other place to call.  I found this 800 number.. did you know there is a 24 hr service line?    I called that and told the lady what had happen.  She said there wasn't anythign she can do for me, but she can check the status of the account.  She came back on and said that I did not have an account.  She said to call the office tomorrow.  I was upset, but I went to bed and called early the next morning.

I spoke with a guy up there who said that I had not turned all my documentation in.  I explained to him what happened.  He said I needed to come back up there with my Id my SSC and I needed to take a form to be signed by a non relative or a landlord.  I told him that I did not have a landlord. He said the motel manager would be fine.  So I go and do that, and come back with everything he told me to bring+ the signed paper.  The case worker said I should get some money ont he card by mid day the next day.  So mid day comes, and still nothing.  so I call up there again to see what was going on.  The guy says that my case has been denied!  I asked why, and he said because I failed to bring all the documents in.  I told him I was just up there yesterday and they said that everything was fine now and that I was going to see a balance on the card today!  He said that my case had already been denied before I brought the documents in.  He said I had to go back up there and file again.  I asked him how long that was going to take, and he said up to 30 days!  Why 30 days!  He couldn't answer that.

I am so pissed off and hurt.  I have no money right now.  I have not eaten anything but a couple slices of bread in 2 days because I have no idea where I am going to get the money for food.  My kids are eating, But we are getting bare here and I want to try and make it last.  I tried going to the food pantry.  I am not trying to sound ungrateful, but all we got there was a loaf of bread, 3 bunt cakes, angel food cake and a jar of peanut butter.  Thats not going to cut it.  we can't go back for another week.  I tried to get cash assistance, but they want me to file for CS.  I have no idea where my husband is.  I was told that if I wanted to file for CS, I had to file for divorce or legally file separation. I baely have the money to keep a roof over our heads, how do they expect me to afford an attorney?    I am so pissed of.  Its hard to keep my head up for my kids, I just want to crawl in bed and never get out.  so I just needed to vent.  I thought maybe it would help to get rid of this sinking feeling in my stomach.  I never felt so helpless in my life.  I never thought I would be here.  It just never occurred to me that this can be anyone.  Not knowing how you are going to feed your kids.  Not eating so that your kids can have soemthing to eat. 

And before anyone asks, the motel has free wifi, so no I can't afford internet.  I did try and pawn my laptop, but its so old they wouldn't take it, it also has a cracked screen.  Can't blame me for trying =/   When I do get on my feet, I am going to take that SOB for all he got for putting us through this.  That man is going to be lucky I leave him with a pot to piss in.  I know some of you are going to say thats not right.  Mess with me thats fine.  Im a big girl I can take it.  But he messed with my kids.  I have to hear them cry that they want to see their daddy.  And ask me why we can't see him or live in our old house anymore.  That SOB might not owe me, but he owes them and Im going to make sure he makes up for what he is putting them through.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 19, 2013 at 2:54 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:02 AM

Srory just a vent

mommy404204
by Bronze Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:03 AM

I am so sorry hun. Wish I had advice or something maybe try a womans shelter if there is one in your area? sometimes they have people that will help you get apartments. And Idk what is up with your welfare office they all sound like A holes. They should be able to do something to help you file for CS they usually only need ur husbands SS number and name to get that started. Kepp calling around maybe a catholic church or something might be able to help you. If I was you I would just keep looking every possible minute you can. Good luck.

bre_in_pink2878
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:18 AM

:-( I am so sorry you are going through this.  I know it may not be much or sound like much but I will pray for you.  Keep your chin up while it doesn't seem so things do get better.  Many many prayers your way!

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:19 AM

Thank you.  I am going to call around tomorrow.  I am also going to try to refile for emergency FS again and see what happens.  I am thinking, if I can, of going to another office.  It might be further but we will see.  I didn't know the part about the CS.  She never said that.  She just said that I needed to file for CS, then bring them a statement for the AG office.  I am also going to look for another job, since this one cant give me enough hrs.  In order to make it, I need that 40 hrs and then some.  i will do what I have to to feed my kids.  I ain't too proud to beg lol.. at least not for them


Quoting mommy404204:

I am so sorry hun. Wish I had advice or something maybe try a womans shelter if there is one in your area? sometimes they have people that will help you get apartments. And Idk what is up with your welfare office they all sound like A holes. They should be able to do something to help you file for CS they usually only need ur husbands SS number and name to get that started. Kepp calling around maybe a catholic church or something might be able to help you. If I was you I would just keep looking every possible minute you can. Good luck.



MsEmma88
by Gold Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:21 AM
I'm so sorry mama. I don't know what state your in but here you can apply for emergency pa until they can get their ducks in a row. You just have to prove you need it (which obviously you do) stay strong mama ill keep you in my prayers
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frzmamaof4
by Silver Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:25 AM
So sorry that your going though this because your SO is a piece of shit! I hope you take him to the cleaners when your through with his ass in court! *hugs*
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DEJavu17
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:27 AM
As far as filing for legal separation, to cover the fees you can file a from at the court, here in PA its called in forma pauperus. Basically its a form that goes in front of a judge showing that you have no means to cover the legal fees. Then go to the prothonotary and find out what forms you need to file for legal separation. You should receive the in format pauperus ruling within 2 weeks. In the mean time file an appeal at your assistance office. Good luck, hope you are able to get on your feet soon.
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BelleVernonGirl
by Gold Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:27 AM

Go to legal aide...they will get you a lawyer...But yes you should be able to open a child support case through them...the workers at the PA office are always assholes and have no clue what they are doing...it's sad really...and no one cares b/c your poor so who cares if your mistreated...I'm sorry momma...Good Luck!!!!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:33 AM

What state are you in?  I will be glad to try and help you look for some resources.  

cjsix
by Platinum Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 3:33 AM

huggingHugs Momma...I am sorry you are going through this. Call the local Catholic parishes and ask to get a hold of the St Vincent De Paul group there. The ones here are wonderful at helping with things like this. They will help with food from the food locker and sometimes with a gift certificate that can be used only at the local grocer for things like fresh meat,fresh fruit and veggies,tp,etc...just not alcohol or tobabco. Some groups also help will utilities and things like that. What they are able to help with depends upon the donations theynhave been given.I do hope you find help soon. 

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