• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Probably going to get bashed....but I don't agree with spousal support in most situations

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I am all for child support because I feel a man has equal responsibility in raising a kid.  But I think spousal support is stupid in most situations.  I think there should be very few exceptions where someone gets it.

1. Disabled spouse with no way of working

2. SAHM. For a few months until she gets a job..  If she doesn't get a job within the allotted time....oh well. 

I don't think a woman with no kids should get it unless like I said she is disabled .....or her husband was the main bread winner and she kept house.  And again. 90 days to get a job. 

I think if a woman is living with someone then she shouldn't get it.  I have a neighbor who has lived with the same man for 10 years and won't marry him because her spousal support or Alimoney would stop.  Ridiculous. She had no kids with her ex but has two with the new guy,  

there may be other instances where it would be okay. But not many. 

Also...no my DH doesn't pay support to anyone. 

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:02 AM
Replies (31-40):
by Gold Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:54 AM
I don't know anyone who gets it. Having said that, it's not for you (or anyone) to agree with or not, but clearly you've put a lot of thought into it.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Anonymous 9 on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:55 AM
Totally agree with you!
by Anonymous 10 on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:59 AM

I disagree, by mutual decision I am now about 14 years behind my husband career wise. He will tell you he wouldn't be where he is today without me. I would work but I would need suplemental income, to maintain lifestyle.

by Anonymous 11 on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:59 AM
Eh. I got spousal support until my dd turned 18. That was our agreement.
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 9:59 AM
I agree with you. I'm all for being a SAHM but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't think about getting skills in case that doesn't work out. I think it is just plain stupid to put yourself in that situation. What of your spouse dies and you dont have any money coming in? You would really set yourself up for that?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by Anonymous 12 on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:00 AM

Agree, totally other than in specific situations like what you describe above.

OTOH, my neighbor has been divorced for about 15 years. She married at 25 and divorced at 50. She worked for 2 years prior to getting married and never worked after that. At the time she divorced her children were in their late 20's-early 30's. She got a CRAZY settlement - she got the house, generous spousal support, health insurance on her husband's dime until she qualified for medicare, part of her  husband's inheritance from his mother. Ridiculous. IMO. There's absolultely NO reason this woman could not have lived quite well if she and her husband split the house and she, I don't know, GOT A JOB.

Now, 15 years later, her husband is challenging the settlement because he's now retired himself and it's getting hard for him to meet his obligations. My neighbor has dropped $30K in legal fees already fighting this and it's still not over. She still hasn't worked a day since she was 22 years old. Un -f'in - believeable IMO.

What a mess.

by Ruby Member on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:01 AM
My friend's grandma divorced her husband close to 60 years ago and he still pays her alimony. Noe that is excessive.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:01 AM

I agree. Spousal support is generally stupid.

by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:03 AM
If you have left the workforce for a number of years it takes more than 90 days to regain the career you once had. Children of single moms already have much higher rates of poverty.
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
by on Jan. 19, 2013 at 10:04 AM
1 mom liked this
3 grand for 3 kids isn't a lot. I get 1200 for one kid

Quoting Anonymous:

I know a woman who cheated I her husband and they divorced. She has three kids with him. She recieved 3,000 a month in alimony and childsupport. She is always posting pictures of vacation trips, and shopping sprees. I dont understand she cheated on her husband and now recieved this money while living with another man for two years now. She wears an engagement ring but won't marry aswell.

Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)