why is he engaged before me!?

[Anonymous]

I don't even know the right words to describe what im feeling.. I have been with my so on and off for 7 years.. we are back together for 2 years now. Since getting back together I explained how marriage was important to me and he agreed. Well 2 years later we are still not enagaged and his brother who has been with his new gf for a few months just tells us he is engaged last night.. im happy for them but at the same time I am mad, frustrated, hurt.. we have 2 children together youngest being 8 months and I just dont know what to do anymore or how to feel..

Thanks for allowing me to vent..

[wilesmomma]

If marriage really means that much to you, give him an ultimatum.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you just propose to him?

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

It is important to me but at the same time I cannot picture being with or marrying anyone else.. and now I don't want to engaged in the shadow of my bil.. I feel I have been around for years and gave to children to him and I didnt get proposed to. It just hurts

[quote name="wilesmomma" id="0"]If marriage really means that much to you, give him an ultimatum.[/quote

[aprilsalcro]

Sounds like he doesn't want to get married

[LizzieAnnesMom]

i think if you have to give a guy an ultimatum like that, its probably not a marriage you want to be in.

Quoting wilesmomma:

If marriage really means that much to you, give him an ultimatum.

[Anonymous]

You can't compare your relationship to someone else's

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

I would prefer it came from him..

Quoting Anonymous:

Why don't you just propose to him?

[Roxygurl]

Well I think he's telling you he doesn't want to marry you. You have to decide if you're going to stay with a man who has made it clear he doesn't want to get married or if you are going to move on and find a guy that wants what you want.

[Anonymous]

If marriage was truly important to you, you wouldnt have had two kids without being married. He has a free pass. He gets to play house, without putting a ring on it, and you have shown you are okay with being a baby momma not a wife. Why would he change anything?

[ratchetlee]

It took 4.5 years for my husband to propose to me....granted we didn't have any children until after we were married... but it still took a long time.  

You have to decide if he's worth the wait or not.  If he's not, then move on... if he is, just wait it out!  

I know that's easier said than done.... trust me, I've felt what you've felt, for many years.  We started dating in 95 and we were finally married in 2001!  

I don't really have much more advice than that.  Life goes quickly..... once it's your turn, you'll realize it was worth waiting until HE was ready!

Good luck!