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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

SAHM gets lack of help from Husband

My husband works as a Bartender and I am a stay at home mom, I have a 6 year old daughter and me and my hubby have a 3 year old son. My husband works from 4 to 11 5 nights a week and sometimes even longer shifts (open to close on some weekends). I swear he thinks staying at home with the kids is a piece of cake. I get so frustrated at him because on his days off he is tired and hardly helps. Most of the time on his work days our son is still up, and he does help with getting him into bed. but on his days off its like pulling teeth to get a little help at all. I do dishes every day, laundry everyday.. and our son.. he crys and crys for his dad. Just a few days ago I got a stomach bug, the husband worked a double the next day and I had both the kids all day, the following morning (a day he was off) I begged him to get up with the children and he never did. I being weak and sick did it all. And when I try to talk to him about it, I get the cold shoulder. I get so upset, I don't know how to talk about it without getting emotional and just plain mad. Today he told me that he watched our son while I took my daughters books and exchanged them at the libary, so he don't understand what I'm talking about when I say I never get a break. He also reminded me that the day after new years he watched both kids for an hour while I took our christmas tree to my moms for storage. Now don't get me wrong, I love him so much and sometimes we get out of the house and have a great time.. he loves the kids. He works hard so we can afford for me to stay home with the kids.. I just wish I could make him understand that my 24/7 job is hard. I don't get days off.. I feel like his days off work, he should try to help me more. Please help!
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by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 8:55 PM
Replies (11-20):
MommyBoha
by Ruby Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:13 PM
2 moms liked this
when he is home, leave. Let him do the housework, kids and all that. My DH works his ass off and helps out at home. 4 people live in the house and 4 people will help clean it. Im not a maid, Im a wife and a mom.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:13 PM

He is probably exhausted.

Honestly you need to learn to relax.  Laundry can wait.  Hubby has off on the weekends, that is family time.  No laub=ndry or cleaning aside from after meals.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:14 PM
My dh works 6 or 7 days a week 14 or 15 hours a day. I do everything and take care of 4 kids. I have no friends or family here. it is what it is.
winkyloafer
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:15 PM
1 mom liked this
I never really ask him to do anything because I stay at home. When I go back to work is a different story.
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RLT2
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:30 PM

 


Quoting MHarrington8705:

Yea, the post above about doing my job. Ha.. you can tell that person has never been the one doing 5 million things at once. I only mentioned laundry and dishes to try to stay short in the post.. a sthm never rests..


Quoting RLT2:

You won't get any sympathy. People are going to tell you that you owe him blah blah blah, because he works etc. Apparently we should live like indentured fucking servants and be happy about it.


yup, you'll see. Many of the moms don't feel that way of course.

 

la-cosa-nostra
by Gold Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:31 PM
Do you help pay the bills?

Ok then.....
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MHarrington8705
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:36 PM
Actually I do.. I have a photography business that work part time.


Quoting la-cosa-nostra:

Do you help pay the bills?



Ok then.....

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lilmom71
by Bronze Member on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:37 PM
2 moms liked this

Well, it probably is a piece of cake to him because all he has to do is watch them and not clean,cook or anything else.  I am sure when your little one goes to school he will complain even more because the majority of them do unless everything they expect of you is done. Even if you did work you probably would still have to come home and do everything.  Seriuosly I feel for you and have also been there.  An hour here or there isn't squat.  

Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:38 PM

Do you go to his job and help him out when he's tired, or sick, or feels over whelmed?

Acid
by on Jan. 22, 2013 at 9:38 PM

TELL HIM YOU NEED HELP!!  He's not a mind reader.  He can't tell that these things are bothering you.

It's not typical male behaviour, it's not 'all men' it's yours...and a few others on here.

Sit him down and tell him how you feel.

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