SAHM gets lack of help from Husband

[MHarrington8705]

My husband works as a Bartender and I am a stay at home mom, I have a 6 year old daughter and me and my hubby have a 3 year old son. My husband works from 4 to 11 5 nights a week and sometimes even longer shifts (open to close on some weekends). I swear he thinks staying at home with the kids is a piece of cake. I get so frustrated at him because on his days off he is tired and hardly helps. Most of the time on his work days our son is still up, and he does help with getting him into bed. but on his days off its like pulling teeth to get a little help at all. I do dishes every day, laundry everyday.. and our son.. he crys and crys for his dad. Just a few days ago I got a stomach bug, the husband worked a double the next day and I had both the kids all day, the following morning (a day he was off) I begged him to get up with the children and he never did. I being weak and sick did it all. And when I try to talk to him about it, I get the cold shoulder. I get so upset, I don't know how to talk about it without getting emotional and just plain mad. Today he told me that he watched our son while I took my daughters books and exchanged them at the libary, so he don't understand what I'm talking about when I say I never get a break. He also reminded me that the day after new years he watched both kids for an hour while I took our christmas tree to my moms for storage. Now don't get me wrong, I love him so much and sometimes we get out of the house and have a great time.. he loves the kids. He works hard so we can afford for me to stay home with the kids.. I just wish I could make him understand that my 24/7 job is hard. I don't get days off.. I feel like his days off work, he should try to help me more. Please help!

[sweetieiv]

I like to think of my husband and myself as equals. No training needed here. And deffinately not like dog training.

Quoting kirita323:

Most women I know tend to enjoy my likening of training a husband to training a dog.... Women are the superior species. It's not that men are dumb, it's just they respond differently to things. Think of it more as conditioning.

Quoting sweetieiv:

I agree with some of what you're saying. I agree that me time is very important and that she should have some time for herself outside of the home to relax and be herself. I just can't believe someone said they need to TRAIN their husband. Seriously? And the whole chore chart. Omg that is just hillarious.

Quoting kirita323:

You need to get training your husband. As in, lots of positive encouragement, all excited when he lifts a finger. Guys need direction too, ask him to do something, make a list, even do a chore chart like supernanny. It's very frustrating having to do everything. Being a SAHM does not mean cleaning up after a grown man. You clean up after kids all day. Did his dad do much? A lot of guys take after their fathers. And you need to schedule time away. When you're feeling better, tell him you're going out for an hour or two. And go. Me time is very important.

[Anonymous]

And how often do you help him with his job?

[Anonymous]

Want one? 

Quoting Anonymous:

I'm pregnant and run a daycare out of our home and I think its a piece of cake...sorry I'm no help

[Anonymous]

Oh I bake too! So no thanks

Quoting Anonymous:

Want one? 

Quoting Anonymous:

I'm pregnant and run a daycare out of our home and I think its a piece of cake...sorry I'm no help