Update; my dh left me a voicemail. He was crying and pleading for me to forgive him. He said he loves me and the kids more than anything and he's nothing without us. He said he honestly thought it was me setting him up and he'd never do anything to hurt me. I didn't call him back. He tried turning it around on me this morning and he became angry at ME!
My BFF just forwarded me a text from the woman and dh replied. He didn't tell her to stop texting him, he keeps sending her texts. I'm done. He apparently doesn't care. Fuck him.
Edit; I didn't expect to get so many replies. We have 3 kids and I try and avoiding fighting in front of them. I just had surgery and I have a cast on my leg, our sex life went down hill because I'm in a lot of pain from the surgery but I never turned him away. . I won't be able to drive for another 6 weeks. I asked my friend to come help me pack some stuff and asked if I could stay at her house. My dh has no clue where she lives. Dh has sent me a few texts, he asked me if I'm ok (he doesn't know I know), I did reply and said "well... Did you answer her question? Do you think of her when we have sex?" He said she's been bothering him and that he doesn't know her. He only replied to her texts because he thought it was me or a friend of mine trying to catch him. I took a picture of my kids stuff and mine packed up and sent it to him. He sent me 1 back begging me not to leave and swearing up and down that he really did think it was me screwing around. I'm at my friends house and I shut my phone off. My kids asked me why we are staying at my friends house. My friend has a 2 week old baby that is colicky. I'm helping my friend out right now so she can get some sleep. My kids think we are here so I can help her out.
My friend doesn't live too far from me, it took her 10 mins to get here. I'll decide what to do about our 12 year marriage tonight. At this point I'm flipping back and forth between divorce or marriage counseling.
Thanks for the advice. I'll keep you all updated.
i saw a text on dh phone from a number I've never seen before. It said "do you picture me when you have sex with your wife?" Judging by the other texts they haven't had sex yet. He told her to text him after 9pm, that's when he goes to work. If you saw this text on your dh phone what would you do?
I didn't get a chance to confront him.. He left in a massive hurry. I have all night to contemplate what to do.