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Do you understand what CPS/DCFS and so on are really for??

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I see a lot of people lately freaking out saying they're gonna contact CPS...

Umm..is the child being abused? Neglected? Raped? Around drugs that could cause him/her harm?

I got CPS called on me when my girls were running around my own home in just undies and a tshirt. Also when my child had a bruise from falling off her time out chair, and one other time for my child sneaking outside. I do not believe these to be reasons to call, but what do you think is.....?
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:05 AM
Replies (201-206):
Kimsundaram
by Silver Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 12:12 PM
I think children's aid should make it known they won't follow up on calls anon. Cuz those are the crazies that take away from the people who need help. If you won't give your name to them for the sake of kids who could be in danger that's messed up. Calling in take with an anon tip is worse cuz that's just causing trouble. The vengeful ex the can't mind their own business holier then thou neighbor. Ithaca system needs an over haul just as much as many of the social programs do
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:07 PM

In many states (Florida being an exception), a CPS worker has to prove to a judge that the child needs to be removed from the custody of his/her parent.  Also, part of the reason that it takes so darn long for a parent to get his/her child back is because the judge has to authorize that custody change as well.

When the CPS worker says they can't do anything, it usually means that there isn't enough evidence to convince a judge to order the removal of the child.

AND.... due to confidentiality laws, they probably can't even have that conversation with you, so you probably don't know what they can and can't prove.  They can only interview you for whatever information you can give him/her.  They really can't give you ANY information.


Quoting Anonymous:

I think CPS is a big JOKE.  As a nurse, I have seen first hand how they have let babies go home to unsafe, dangerous situations w/their drug addicted parents and do NOTHING about it.  They just send them home.  When asked about it, they're response is that they "can't do anything" and if the child is "actually abused" later then they can step in.  So doing drugs while pregnant is not considered abuse or neglect and we have to "wait and see".

Makes me sick.  These kids don't stand a chance. The system is seriously flawed and the government does not care.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 25, 2013 at 1:13 PM
I'm not trolling.

I've liked multiple comments, but don't see the need to reply to anyone else because I haven't read that anyone else was accusing me in all seriousness of being an unfit parent. Not that you said it that way, but that's what you implied.

Now, for your record, CPS was not wrong in any of their doings. I asked in my post if the moms on here truly understand what CPS is for.

When my child escaped into my hated back yard, only 1 person could see her, and that was my back neighbor. She had heard me multiple times complaining about her dogs constantly barking, and I'm sure she thinks we called on her because we had said we would. She had 6 dogs, and 3 cats in a small fenced yard that would bark at all hours of the day and night. She disliked us very much, but CPS didn't tell us who called, so It's not like I was going to run off and accuse her.

When CPS came for my daughters bruises, it was because a day care teacher had called them. I didn't say she was in the wrong, but I was irritated because this preschool teacher actually goes to church with my mil and I felt like she should know it wasn't because i was ever harming my child. I knew it was the preschool teacher cause she called and told us it was her.

With the kids running around half naked, it was fall, and they had actually just come inside from playing outside and had taken off their muddy pants. A guy from my church showed up unannounced and sat to visit with us. My girls were 3 & 2. I know it was him who called not because CPS told me, but because he was the only person to have seen my girls like that. Because they don't run around like that most of the time.

I have nothing to hide. My houae was not nor has it ever been immaculate. But apparently CPS didn't see that as a problem because their weren't animal feces any where, or moody gross diapers, or food where it didn't belong.

Again, I am not a perfect mom, but if you are someone who would call in these exact circumstances, I would think you're an abuser of the system.

They never once even suggested I would lose my kids. But it was still quite an awful feeling knowing that at any time someone could call out of pure spite and I would be under the scrutiny of the state.



Quoting jessi2girls:

I didn't say that all the cases ever called in to CPS were legit, you happened to have a spiteful neighbor.. I said that the OP is not revealing things about what happened to her..

Look at what happened with you.. you aren't angry with CPS, you realized it was a spiteful neighbor and now volunteer..

However this op.. is hiding quite a bit in this post as it is.. which makes me suspicious.. (most of the other posters, you'll find, elaborated as to why it was a unjustified call if they had the experience of CPS being called on them.. angry neighbor, spiteful family member or ex..or they went on to elaborate why they called CPS and why it was justified..)  most people who are innocent have nothing to hide.. and most of those people aren't angry AT CPS.  They may be a bit angry at the people that called just because they were angry.. but that's about it.. One poster even admitted she understood why CPS shows up more frequently in her neighboorhood and while she knew the time they were called on her was from a spiteful neighbor, she understands that in the neighboorhood she lives it, it wasn't that far stretched to make such assumptions.. because most of the time in that neighboorhood they were right.

I find it even more suspicious that the ONLY reply she's made in this ENTIRE post, is to mine.. (and no, I wasn't the only one who drew this conclusion).  So honestly I don't even know if I believe  her stories at all or if she's just looking to rant and troll.

 

Quoting Lovemyfamilyof8:

 LOL, that is so untrue, I had one woman call 7 times in one monht, I volunteered a drug test and passed ( I don;t even smoke weed) She said we had cat shit everywhere ( we didn;t have a cat). She said we had a closet full of dirty lundry ( CPS came and that closet was tuft boxes for DH army deployment gear). She said we locked our kids in the basement ( We don;t have a basement) . She called at 9 AM on a Wednesday and they showed up at 10 AM with my husband and his commande , the report said I was drunk, the kids wre outside naked and starving. They came and I had a Catholic church group there, no alcohol in the house, I was sober, 3 kids were at school, and the other3 were dressed eating Brunch with the church kids. Now tell me how I was in the wrong? She called because she hated my dog and said she would do anything to get us to move. She went to jail for 6 weeks and paid the county a fine of 6,000.00 for false reporting. Things happen! I currently volunteer at CPS and help families get their homes in order. It was all frap. Some people and some areas simply call a lot for BS


Quoting jessi2girls:




Quoting Anonymous:

In all seriousness, it happened 3 times. All 3 times the cases were closed with no issues. In fact, the 3rd time, the CPS worker apologized for having to come again. I was irritated, and told him I was, and he left. The case was closed the same day.

Now in all seriousness, are YOU a parenting failure? Or do you just try to make others feel that way?



Quoting jessi2girls:


In all seriousness, since you've had them called 3 seperate times, I'd honestly be extremely concerned for what you are not mentioning about how you raise your children, and in all likelihood, the people (person) calling knows a bit more than you are revealing. 



Having cps called on three seperate occations raises red flags.  So, as I said, there is likely more going on than you are revealing.. just because cps closed the case, or you put on a good show, doesn't mean someone else isn't aware of what's really going on. 


BTW I see you failed to address my other comments. 


 



jessi2girls
by Ruby Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 4:07 PM


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm not trolling.

I've liked multiple comments, but don't see the need to reply to anyone else because I haven't read that anyone else was accusing me in all seriousness of being an unfit parent. Not that you said it that way, but that's what you implied.No, it wasn't what I implied, I implied that there was more to the story than you were giving out, and without further information, it did sound suspicious.  That does not equate to unfit.. just very simply.. questionable.


Now, for your record, CPS was not wrong in any of their doings. I asked in my post if the moms on here truly understand what CPS is for.

When my child escaped into my hated back yard, only 1 person could see her, and that was my back neighbor. She had heard me multiple times complaining about her dogs constantly barking, and I'm sure she thinks we called on her because we had said we would. She had 6 dogs, and 3 cats in a small fenced yard that would bark at all hours of the day and night. She disliked us very much, but CPS didn't tell us who called, so It's not like I was going to run off and accuse her.

When CPS came for my daughters bruises, it was because a day care teacher had called them. I didn't say she was in the wrong, but I was irritated because this preschool teacher actually goes to church with my mil and I felt like she should know it wasn't because i was ever harming my child. I knew it was the preschool teacher cause she called and told us it was her.

With the kids running around half naked, it was fall, and they had actually just come inside from playing outside and had taken off their muddy pants. A guy from my church showed up unannounced and sat to visit with us. My girls were 3 & 2. I know it was him who called not because CPS told me, but because he was the only person to have seen my girls like that. Because they don't run around like that most of the time.

I have nothing to hide. My houae was not nor has it ever been immaculate. But apparently CPS didn't see that as a problem because their weren't animal feces any where, or moody gross diapers, or food where it didn't belong.

Again, I am not a perfect mom, but if you are someone who would call in these exact circumstances, I would think you're an abuser of the system.The preschool teacher is a manditory reporter.  It's her JOB to call, and if she doesnt' she can get into a lot of trouble.  As for your child getting out of the house and into the back yard.. it may have been simply spit, but it CAN be seen as neglect.. and parents HAVE been charged with such..is it always the right call? No.. but an unsupervised child, is technically neglect.  And yes, prior to getting a fully detailed response, it was questionable. Very rarely does CPS come out from THREE DIFFERENT CALLERS, and there not be a more valid reason for it. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but clearly you can see why it makes one wonder.


They never once even suggested I would lose my kids. But it was still quite an awful feeling knowing that at any time someone could call out of pure spite and I would be under the scrutiny of the state.I'm sure it is scary.. but honestly, the examples you gave, TWO of them could be seen as reasons to call and report, yes you had reason excuses for your child's bruises.. hopefully you've taken care of the door and have it latched better so your children can't sneak out any more..  (they also have $15-$20 mini alarms you can place on the doors, that just beep or have a bell chime when the door opens to alert you).
Quoting jessi2girls:

I didn't say that all the cases ever called in to CPS were legit, you happened to have a spiteful neighbor.. I said that the OP is not revealing things about what happened to her..

Look at what happened with you.. you aren't angry with CPS, you realized it was a spiteful neighbor and now volunteer..

However this op.. is hiding quite a bit in this post as it is.. which makes me suspicious.. (most of the other posters, you'll find, elaborated as to why it was a unjustified call if they had the experience of CPS being called on them.. angry neighbor, spiteful family member or ex..or they went on to elaborate why they called CPS and why it was justified..)  most people who are innocent have nothing to hide.. and most of those people aren't angry AT CPS.  They may be a bit angry at the people that called just because they were angry.. but that's about it.. One poster even admitted she understood why CPS shows up more frequently in her neighboorhood and while she knew the time they were called on her was from a spiteful neighbor, she understands that in the neighboorhood she lives it, it wasn't that far stretched to make such assumptions.. because most of the time in that neighboorhood they were right.

I find it even more suspicious that the ONLY reply she's made in this ENTIRE post, is to mine.. (and no, I wasn't the only one who drew this conclusion).  So honestly I don't even know if I believe  her stories at all or if she's just looking to rant and troll.

 

Quoting Lovemyfamilyof8:

 LOL, that is so untrue, I had one woman call 7 times in one monht, I volunteered a drug test and passed ( I don;t even smoke weed) She said we had cat shit everywhere ( we didn;t have a cat). She said we had a closet full of dirty lundry ( CPS came and that closet was tuft boxes for DH army deployment gear). She said we locked our kids in the basement ( We don;t have a basement) . She called at 9 AM on a Wednesday and they showed up at 10 AM with my husband and his commande , the report said I was drunk, the kids wre outside naked and starving. They came and I had a Catholic church group there, no alcohol in the house, I was sober, 3 kids were at school, and the other3 were dressed eating Brunch with the church kids. Now tell me how I was in the wrong? She called because she hated my dog and said she would do anything to get us to move. She went to jail for 6 weeks and paid the county a fine of 6,000.00 for false reporting. Things happen! I currently volunteer at CPS and help families get their homes in order. It was all frap. Some people and some areas simply call a lot for BS


Quoting jessi2girls:




Quoting Anonymous:

In all seriousness, it happened 3 times. All 3 times the cases were closed with no issues. In fact, the 3rd time, the CPS worker apologized for having to come again. I was irritated, and told him I was, and he left. The case was closed the same day.

Now in all seriousness, are YOU a parenting failure? Or do you just try to make others feel that way?



Quoting jessi2girls:


In all seriousness, since you've had them called 3 seperate times, I'd honestly be extremely concerned for what you are not mentioning about how you raise your children, and in all likelihood, the people (person) calling knows a bit more than you are revealing. 



Having cps called on three seperate occations raises red flags.  So, as I said, there is likely more going on than you are revealing.. just because cps closed the case, or you put on a good show, doesn't mean someone else isn't aware of what's really going on. 


BTW I see you failed to address my other comments. 


 




Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 25, 2013 at 4:45 PM
1 mom liked this
Thank you for your obvious concern. My children are now older and much wiser to not leave the home without telling me or DH. But we did have to put chains on our doors before we moved where we are now.

I was aware that the preschool teacher was a mandated reporter. However, she had kids in her preschool biting other kids. Not an excuse, but my child was coming home with bruises.

I also understand that you couldn't have known any of the previous things without me telling you.


Quoting jessi2girls:


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm not trolling.



I've liked multiple comments, but don't see the need to reply to anyone else because I haven't read that anyone else was accusing me in all seriousness of being an unfit parent. Not that you said it that way, but that's what you implied.No, it wasn't what I implied, I implied that there was more to the story than you were giving out, and without further information, it did sound suspicious.  That does not equate to unfit.. just very simply.. questionable.




Now, for your record, CPS was not wrong in any of their doings. I asked in my post if the moms on here truly understand what CPS is for.



When my child escaped into my hated back yard, only 1 person could see her, and that was my back neighbor. She had heard me multiple times complaining about her dogs constantly barking, and I'm sure she thinks we called on her because we had said we would. She had 6 dogs, and 3 cats in a small fenced yard that would bark at all hours of the day and night. She disliked us very much, but CPS didn't tell us who called, so It's not like I was going to run off and accuse her.



When CPS came for my daughters bruises, it was because a day care teacher had called them. I didn't say she was in the wrong, but I was irritated because this preschool teacher actually goes to church with my mil and I felt like she should know it wasn't because i was ever harming my child. I knew it was the preschool teacher cause she called and told us it was her.



With the kids running around half naked, it was fall, and they had actually just come inside from playing outside and had taken off their muddy pants. A guy from my church showed up unannounced and sat to visit with us. My girls were 3 & 2. I know it was him who called not because CPS told me, but because he was the only person to have seen my girls like that. Because they don't run around like that most of the time.



I have nothing to hide. My houae was not nor has it ever been immaculate. But apparently CPS didn't see that as a problem because their weren't animal feces any where, or moody gross diapers, or food where it didn't belong.



Again, I am not a perfect mom, but if you are someone who would call in these exact circumstances, I would think you're an abuser of the system.The preschool teacher is a manditory reporter.  It's her JOB to call, and if she doesnt' she can get into a lot of trouble.  As for your child getting out of the house and into the back yard.. it may have been simply spit, but it CAN be seen as neglect.. and parents HAVE been charged with such..is it always the right call? No.. but an unsupervised child, is technically neglect.  And yes, prior to getting a fully detailed response, it was questionable. Very rarely does CPS come out from THREE DIFFERENT CALLERS, and there not be a more valid reason for it. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but clearly you can see why it makes one wonder.




They never once even suggested I would lose my kids. But it was still quite an awful feeling knowing that at any time someone could call out of pure spite and I would be under the scrutiny of the state.I'm sure it is scary.. but honestly, the examples you gave, TWO of them could be seen as reasons to call and report, yes you had reason excuses for your child's bruises.. hopefully you've taken care of the door and have it latched better so your children can't sneak out any more..  (they also have $15-$20 mini alarms you can place on the doors, that just beep or have a bell chime when the door opens to alert you).
Quoting jessi2girls:

I didn't say that all the cases ever called in to CPS were legit, you happened to have a spiteful neighbor.. I said that the OP is not revealing things about what happened to her..

Look at what happened with you.. you aren't angry with CPS, you realized it was a spiteful neighbor and now volunteer..

However this op.. is hiding quite a bit in this post as it is.. which makes me suspicious.. (most of the other posters, you'll find, elaborated as to why it was a unjustified call if they had the experience of CPS being called on them.. angry neighbor, spiteful family member or ex..or they went on to elaborate why they called CPS and why it was justified..)  most people who are innocent have nothing to hide.. and most of those people aren't angry AT CPS.  They may be a bit angry at the people that called just because they were angry.. but that's about it.. One poster even admitted she understood why CPS shows up more frequently in her neighboorhood and while she knew the time they were called on her was from a spiteful neighbor, she understands that in the neighboorhood she lives it, it wasn't that far stretched to make such assumptions.. because most of the time in that neighboorhood they were right.

I find it even more suspicious that the ONLY reply she's made in this ENTIRE post, is to mine.. (and no, I wasn't the only one who drew this conclusion).  So honestly I don't even know if I believe  her stories at all or if she's just looking to rant and troll.

 

Quoting Lovemyfamilyof8:

 LOL, that is so untrue, I had one woman call 7 times in one monht, I volunteered a drug test and passed ( I don;t even smoke weed) She said we had cat shit everywhere ( we didn;t have a cat). She said we had a closet full of dirty lundry ( CPS came and that closet was tuft boxes for DH army deployment gear). She said we locked our kids in the basement ( We don;t have a basement) . She called at 9 AM on a Wednesday and they showed up at 10 AM with my husband and his commande , the report said I was drunk, the kids wre outside naked and starving. They came and I had a Catholic church group there, no alcohol in the house, I was sober, 3 kids were at school, and the other3 were dressed eating Brunch with the church kids. Now tell me how I was in the wrong? She called because she hated my dog and said she would do anything to get us to move. She went to jail for 6 weeks and paid the county a fine of 6,000.00 for false reporting. Things happen! I currently volunteer at CPS and help families get their homes in order. It was all frap. Some people and some areas simply call a lot for BS



Quoting jessi2girls:






Quoting Anonymous:

In all seriousness, it happened 3 times. All 3 times the cases were closed with no issues. In fact, the 3rd time, the CPS worker apologized for having to come again. I was irritated, and told him I was, and he left. The case was closed the same day.

Now in all seriousness, are YOU a parenting failure? Or do you just try to make others feel that way?




Quoting jessi2girls:



In all seriousness, since you've had them called 3 seperate times, I'd honestly be extremely concerned for what you are not mentioning about how you raise your children, and in all likelihood, the people (person) calling knows a bit more than you are revealing. 




Having cps called on three seperate occations raises red flags.  So, as I said, there is likely more going on than you are revealing.. just because cps closed the case, or you put on a good show, doesn't mean someone else isn't aware of what's really going on. 



BTW I see you failed to address my other comments. 



 






Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 26, 2013 at 11:42 AM

 Actually, they can and do give info to me, the primary nurse. My point is, why is it that when we know and can prove that the mother or parents are drug addicts (ie + tox scene on admission,or infant withdrawing) that the child goes home w/these people?  What is there to prove?  How much evidence do you need?  Why is the system not protecting the children? 

I'm guessing that you are a Social Worker and if you are I commend you and all other social workers.  I know the job you do is most times unrecognized and unappreciated.  I also know that you don't make the rules and in most places completely understaffed.  I system itself is flawed. Not the workers. 

I personally am very fustrated by it.  It makes me sick. We have considered becoming a foster family.  They make is so difficult, drawn out, and ridiculous that they are actually discouraging.  And then they cry that they don't have enough foster homes.


Quoting Anonymous:

In many states (Florida being an exception), a CPS worker has to prove to a judge that the child needs to be removed from the custody of his/her parent.  Also, part of the reason that it takes so darn long for a parent to get his/her child back is because the judge has to authorize that custody change as well.

When the CPS worker says they can't do anything, it usually means that there isn't enough evidence to convince a judge to order the removal of the child.

AND.... due to confidentiality laws, they probably can't even have that conversation with you, so you probably don't know what they can and can't prove.  They can only interview you for whatever information you can give him/her.  They really can't give you ANY information.

 

Quoting Anonymous:

I think CPS is a big JOKE.  As a nurse, I have seen first hand how they have let babies go home to unsafe, dangerous situations w/their drug addicted parents and do NOTHING about it.  They just send them home.  When asked about it, they're response is that they "can't do anything" and if the child is "actually abused" later then they can step in.  So doing drugs while pregnant is not considered abuse or neglect and we have to "wait and see".

Makes me sick.  These kids don't stand a chance. The system is seriously flawed and the government does not care.

 

 


 

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