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For the best, but I'm really scared. Sorry it's long but.. A lot to say.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 9 Replies
I've always been dependent on my husband, and before that my mom.. I went straight from home to him.. No education, no job, no car or license.. I've been a stay at home mom for almost 5 years now.. When I was young I didn't give much thought to my future.. I was depressed and confused about life and who I was.. Then I met my husband and we were together ever since.. He's been the sole provider for everything.. He's controlling, abusive and unfaithful.. he's kept me from doing anything with my life.. But I almost didn't really care because I became a mom and I just focused on doing that.. I tried for years to change him. Obviously that doesn't work.. I was just one of those unrealistic women that want their family so bad they are blind to the truth about serious issues.. I am happy to say I'm now leaving him.. But I have nothing.. My kids have nothing to revive from me but.. Love. I don't know how this is going to work.. I don't know what I'm going to do.. All I know is I'm doing it.. If finally hit the cold rock bottom. And I'm scared to death of failing.. He's finally agreed to let me leave him.. But I already know he'll most likely be in my ear a lot.. Which won't make it any easier.. But I know I can do it this time.. I just am so afraid of the world.. I hate to admit it. When I was young I had no cares.. But now two children with nothing to give them.. A lot of social anxiety and serious emotional issues.. I'm afraid of being out in the world.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 24, 2013 at 12:44 PM
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Replies (1-9):
owl0210
by Emerald Member on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:38 PM

 Good luck mama!!!

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:40 PM

You can do it mama!!

Amy_M
by Silver Member on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:41 PM

Good luck!  The "real" world is a scary place if you let it be.  Whatever you do DON'T allow him to maniplulate you in any way.  Go to a lawyer talk with family, know your rights.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:42 PM
1 mom liked this

 Focus on YOU and your children. Get resources for your basic needs....Home,food,utilities.  PA is there, USE IT.  There are womens advocacy groups that can help.....Next get a counselor...a therapist to help you thru this emotionally and mentally.  This will also help you decide on your future. Do you want to go to college, get a job?  therapists and job counselors are the best place to go.

Good luck mama...!!!! It'll all work out..Just focus on the future, and not the past.

mariesmama
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:43 PM

i'm 33 and just about in the same boat i'm not leaving hubby, but if he cannot keep jobs, that leaves me to find one in a town where the seekers outnumber the jobs we need rent money, so i've gotta keep looking and i've been mommy for 3 yrs i somehow mess up interveiws my problem is i either need cash register training or a drivers license

AdryF
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:45 PM
Good luck and ((hugs)).
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:45 PM
I left over 10 years ago now. It will be hard, but not as hard as staying. Keep in mind that real rewards come later and you are not weak! (His might be the biggest challenge after living in a situation that brings you down. After 10 years I still have to remind myself the the ex was full of lies, I am smart and capable of achieving my goals and dreams! Never give up, you are worth it!
twinmommy27
by Ruby Member on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:48 PM
You can do it, stay strong and focus on yours and your children's future.

Hugs!!
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glycerinej
by on Jan. 24, 2013 at 2:54 PM
You CAN do this... yes it will be hard, but no matter how hard it is its better than being in an abusive relationship. Go apply for assistance, do NOT be ashamed its there for people who need it. Start looking for jobs!! The MOST IMPORTANT thing you need to do is file for custody and child support.
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