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Am I in the wrong here or is he overreacting??

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Ok so DF and I got stationed to a new place. He has a few friends here. I have none.


About a month ago DF got a DUI and it got spread throughout the spouses through his "best friends" wife. She gossiped. Yadda yadda yadda.


Now I'm here. I want to go and get my hair cut. I am on the bases spouses fb page. I wanted to ask if anyone had a certain person they went to. I wanted reccomendations . I don't want to go to someone and get my hair effed up.


Well that fired him up. He yelled at me and said I shouldn't be asking them for anything. They spread lies about him and whatever.


This is how I see it. HIS friends' wife talked crap about him. She spread shit. He has to deal with it. NOW I can't make friendly with the other military wives CAUSE HE SAID SO. This is no fair. I wanted to ask a simple question. I just want a decent hairdresser.


I feel this is just ridiculous but he went to bed and slammed shit along the way. I moved across the country to be with him. WTF????

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 25, 2013 at 6:33 AM
Replies (21-30):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 25, 2013 at 6:56 AM
He overreacted for sure. Reach out to all the wives you want. Having friends is important. He probably is embarrassed and feels like everyone is talking bad about him. That's understandable, but he needs to understand you, too.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 25, 2013 at 6:56 AM

That is his defense of us not getting caught up in drama. I know him and he wouldn't try to control me but sometimes like tonight when we are most vulnerable he just seems like it's his way or no way.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quote:

 NOW I can't make friendly with the other military wives CAUSE HE SAID SO. 

red flags in this statement here..if he makes you feel like that, he is abusing you


Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Jan. 25, 2013 at 6:57 AM
This. Is not like she spread lies. He messed up and needs to take responsibility. He also needs to grow up a bit. Seriously? Not letting you have friends because he is butt hurt/embarrassed about messing up?
Military wives and soldies gossip. They all do it. Heck, I know about the intimate life of some of dhs friends (although i dont go around telling everyone about it) . Its just the way it is.
Tell him to suck it up. Its not fair to you. I could understand a little if he didn't want you being friends with that particular wife, but ANY other wife? Thats just ridiculous!

Quoting Hierophant85:

He fucked up, not you. You shouldn't be punished because people gossiped about something that happened to be true.
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DazeDelights
by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 6:58 AM
Let him be mad. You have done nothing wrong. He has no right to stop you from being friendly or making friends.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:00 AM

that's a really poor and immature defense on his part....tell him to grow up, and  you ARE going to make your own choices about what friends to have, and if he doens't like it--OH WELL!!


Quoting Anonymous:

That is his defense of us not getting caught up in drama. I know him and he wouldn't try to control me but sometimes like tonight when we are most vulnerable he just seems like it's his way or no way.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quote:

 NOW I can't make friendly with the other military wives CAUSE HE SAID SO. 

red flags in this statement here..if he makes you feel like that, he is abusing you




Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:00 AM

Thank you. I have no interest in being friends with her even though her husband and mine are best friends. I can't trust her. I can't imagine NOT having friends while we are stationed here because of her drama. Like I said, I know he made a mistake but he is paying for it. If he leaves I want to be able to have a support sysytem of wives or whatever it may so be.

Quoting Anonymous:

This. Is not like she spread lies. He messed up and needs to take responsibility. He also needs to grow up a bit. Seriously? Not letting you have friends because he is butt hurt/embarrassed about messing up?
Military wives and soldies gossip. They all do it. Heck, I know about the intimate life of some of dhs friends (although i dont go around telling everyone about it) . Its just the way it is.
Tell him to suck it up. Its not fair to you. I could understand a little if he didn't want you being friends with that particul wife, but ANY other wife? Thats just ridiculous!

Quoting Hierophant85:

He fucked up, not you. You shouldn't be punished because people gossiped about something that happened to be true.


sam12796
by Platinum Member on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:01 AM

 He is way out of line. He should be mad at the friend's wife and call her out. Not all the wives participated in the gossip as far as he knows. He needs to get better friends and grow up.

mattiehatter
by Mary on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:02 AM
Perhaps he shouldn't have gotten himself a dui. Ask them anyway and hope you find a good hair dresser.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:04 AM

I brought that up tonight but of course he defended her because she is his bff's wife. I feel like I can't compete with that. SHE betrayed his trust but yet can walk back into his life whenever she feels so because of her maritial status. I'm sick of it!

Quoting sam12796:

 He is way out of line. He should be mad at the friend's wife and call her out. Not all the wives participated in the gossip as far as he knows. He needs to get better friends and grow up.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Jan. 25, 2013 at 7:04 AM
He is acting like a bitch
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