Am I in the wrong here or is he overreacting??

[Anonymous]

Ok so DF and I got stationed to a new place. He has a few friends here. I have none.

About a month ago DF got a DUI and it got spread throughout the spouses through his "best friends" wife. She gossiped. Yadda yadda yadda.

Now I'm here. I want to go and get my hair cut. I am on the bases spouses fb page. I wanted to ask if anyone had a certain person they went to. I wanted reccomendations . I don't want to go to someone and get my hair effed up.

Well that fired him up. He yelled at me and said I shouldn't be asking them for anything. They spread lies about him and whatever.

This is how I see it. HIS friends' wife talked crap about him. She spread shit. He has to deal with it. NOW I can't make friendly with the other military wives CAUSE HE SAID SO. This is no fair. I wanted to ask a simple question. I just want a decent hairdresser.

I feel this is just ridiculous but he went to bed and slammed shit along the way. I moved across the country to be with him. WTF????

[Anonymous - Original Poster]

LOL thanks chicka!

Quoting mattiehatter:

Perhaps he shouldn't have gotten himself a dui. Ask them anyway and hope you find a good hair dresser.

[Melissa_4]

My fear is this is just the beginning.  What are you supposed to do if he gets deployed, sit in the house and stare at the walls?  He screwed up and got a DUI.  That's not something his friend's wife made up.  Perhaps he should talk to his friend's wife, and stop being an ass.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, you don't want to go through a deployment/tdy completely alone. Having other military wives around is a great thing and soo helpful. No one really knows what we go through and most of them are amazing people who will become like your family and be ready to help you with anything. Don't let him deny you that opportunity. Yes, some wives are "bad apples" but in over 5 years in the military I've found the majority are simply amazing!

Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you. I have no interest in being friends with her even though her husband and mine are best friends. I can't trust her. I can't imagine NOT having friends while we are stationed here because of her drama. Like I said, I know he made a mistake but he is paying for it. If he leaves I want to be able to have a support sysytem of wives or whatever it may so be.

Quoting Anonymous:

This. Is not like she spread lies. He messed up and needs to take responsibility. He also needs to grow up a bit. Seriously? Not letting you have friends because he is butt hurt/embarrassed about messing up?
Military wives and soldies gossip. They all do it. Heck, I know about the intimate life of some of dhs friends (although i dont go around telling everyone about it) . Its just the way it is.
Tell him to suck it up. Its not fair to you. I could understand a little if he didn't want you being friends with that particul wife, but ANY other wife? Thats just ridiculous!

Quoting Hierophant85:

He fucked up, not you. You shouldn't be punished because people gossiped about something that happened to be true.

[Anonymous]

But that is the issue. He got a DUI (which is wildly shameful, and he should feel disgraced), he is embarrassed and mad that word got out and now he wants to take his toys and go home, and bring you too.

If the DUI didn't happen, he wouldn't care.

If it were me, I would post as I pleased. He made his bed, I'll be damned if I get a bad haircut too.

My disclaimer: There is a chance I don't do fall into the nice wife who obeys her husband grouping. Sooooo......we may have different philosophies. I also have a VERY negative view of those who put themselves in a position to receive a DUI. I would not be considerate of his feelings at this point with regard to a message board, but a DUI would seriously impact my relationship with my husband sooo.......

Quoting Anonymous:

The DUI isn't what is bothering me. It's just his whole mentality of "Well I'f I can't do it then you can't"  or making me feel guilty.

Quoting Ninjascreenname:

He's being an ass. Its not your fault he got a DUI.

[Kmary]

First off, he seems to be mistaking accurate gossip for lies.  Did he or did he not get a DUI?  If he did, then no one has been lying about him.  A little gossip maybe, but not lying.  He's ashamed of his actions and taking it out on you.  Ignore that BS and get yourself a damn haircut recommendation.

[Anonymous]

You married a child; deal with it.

[.MommyEast.]

Stop letting him walk all over you. its his fault he got a duI

[prdmama1154]

He shouldn't have gotten a DUI. Ask whoever you want about a good hair dresser and tell him to stop acting like an idiot.

[3lilmonsters88]

Oh stfu. You know good and well he's overreacting. By posting this you're just inviting people to bash your df.

Quoting Anonymous:

Um what? Unless you have something constructive to contribute then move on.

Quoting 3lilmonsters88:

Um....