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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Mother of a Transgendered Child

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Hello!

My name is Jennifer, I am 31 years old and the mother of two amazing children. My oldest child is 11 years old and really intelligent. Now, I know parents say that a lot about their children but she really is very smart. She is 11 years old and already taking high school credits and next year she will be taking college credits. She is spunky and has a mind and style all her own. She never follows the crowd and is a trend setter at her school.

My youngest is also just as awesome and unique. My youngest came and sat me down about 2 months ago. Actually, my oldest came to me first and said, "Mom, Erin and I have something that we need to talk to you about." That is when I sat down with my kids and had my youngest tell me, "Mom, I'm a girl." I had no idea what to think at first; you see, Erin had been in fact born Aaron, a boy. Now, I have seen the signs since she was very young but always would tell her that she is a boys and boys don't dress or act that way. When my kids sat me down, however, it hit me. Erin had been confiding in her sister for a while; they would dress up together in private, too afraid to tell me cause Erin did not want to disappoint me. I thought it over for a minute and thought about how I have always told my kids they could be whatever they wanted to be, that I would always love them because I am their mother. I realized I could not be upset, that no matter what, this is still my child; my child I gave birth to and have loved and still love with all my heart and soul.

Ever since Erin has came out to me and people around her, she has been a totally different child; happier and more at peace. Erin used to be an introvert and a troublemaker at home. She would throw tantrums, backtalk, and try to cause self harm, but ever since she has came out to the world, she is very lovable, very well behaved, and has so many friends. I have seen so many people point accusing fingers at me, telling me that somehow this is my fault and that I am crazy for allowing Erin to be herself instead of boy. They did not see the child before the transformation.

I want parents and everyone to think about something before pointing fingers and making accusations. Think about how I said my child was self harming before coming out. It was scary not knowing how to help my child because they felt alone. You can't tell me therapy would have been suffice because I tried therapy and hospitalization, cause I did not know at the time why Erin was self harming. Trust me, nothing worked. But ever since Erin has came out to me and has support now from therapist and me, she has done a total turn around.

As a parent, it is our duty to protect our children and love them forever. It is our duty to nurture them and encourage them. On top of all that, though, it is not our job to tell them what they can or cannot be. We need to help them find their talents and to nurture those talents. Love them unconditionally.

by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:46 AM
Replies (651-660):
DanaAlise
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:10 PM
4 moms liked this
I ask that all cafe moms praise this mother,my mother is also a non judgemental mother and a loving saint. with the support of my mom and father my children, I transitioned later in life. I am MTF as well and I am proud of You and the cafe Moms.I hope for Your child and You a stress free life with all the supportive friends and family that You all deserve,
ms_danielle_j
by Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:10 PM
Couldn't have put it better myself....and the crazy part about it is the moms who criticize and condemn others with their negativity most likely have the most problems in their lives and just want to make u feel just like they do.




Quoting Jessica_Esqueda:

First, since you're new, I want to point out that bitches around here are freaking rude and you can probably expect some unnecessary cruelty or bashing. It's immature at best. 


that being said, I think you are an AMAZING woman and mother for doing what your little girl NEEDS you to do. Most people wouldn't accept that their child has a gender identity disorder, and would try to cure them of it. You are a beautiful person! HUGS. Also, your daughter is beautiful!


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
DieMyDarling
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:11 PM
2 moms liked this
I'd totally be down for meeting her in real life to do so. Really, there are only 3 things that anger me to that level and its people who mess with children, my family, and my money. I hate bullies, I am not a bully, but i can defend myself and never just stand idly by if someone is being treated badly/bullied. If you could see 90% of my posts I think you'd get a better idea of how kind I actually can be and am. But I'm sorry, I cannot stand people who bully (especially!!) children and other women. It's infuriating and I wasn't just addressing her calling me a bad parent, she said I should take the mothers sons balls he's not going to use. Does that not disgust you? Does it not upset you that she would speak about them like that? I know hate doesn't drive out hate, but sometimes people are so dumb they need a good ass whopping to learn how to shut up and keep horrible things like that to themselves. God help us if there comes a day when everyone gets so passive that they won't even stand up for someone being unjustly hated on. It's one thing to be a lover, it's another thing to do nothing.


Quoting mommieJJ03:

You are who you are and we are adults.....but really

knocking someone's teeth out for calling you a bad parent, that is just useless plus it's the internet no one takes threats seriously. Now it will be ok, your right about that have a good day.




Quoting DieMyDarling:

*yawn*





It says plenty about me. It says ill get foul mouthed with someone if they call me a bad parent for supporting a transgendered child and their mother. I'd do more, too. That person couldn't get on my level if her life depended on it. People yell and say bad words in real life, it's going to be okay.






Quoting mommieJJ03:

The fact that you have actually resorted to using such



hateful language doesn't say much about you. Whenever someone is ignorant or spiteful it does nothing to get in their level.








Quoting DieMyDarling:

Hey bitch, I have plenty of spine. In the real world if u said that to my face I'd knock your teeth out. You're the one bashing children online. I'm a fantastic mother so you can take your hate and shove it up your pathetic Internet bullying ass. I'm not a yes man to anyone and if you knew me in real life it'd be obvious at first glance. Now go try to insult someone who cares, and I say try because I don't take a damn thing an ignorant hateful bitch that hates on children and mothers has to say seriously.




Losers like you are a dime a dozen. I'm bored with you...run back to the hell you live in, I'm going to get back to my awesome life filled with positivity and love and happiness. You're disgusting, congrats on being ugly on the inside,










Quoting Anonymous:

 at least my kids live in the real world and not Narnia...I have the balls to guide and parent my kids...maybe you should take the balls her SON  is obviously  never going to use and use them to be a parent, not a yes-man












Quoting DieMyDarling:

I know right?! They don't even have enough pride in their hateful convictions to use their damn screen names. *eye roll* spineless bitches, fuck em. I feel sorry for their children.







Quoting ProudMommy51006:

All of you anons are pieces of work. Let me tell ya








Quoting Anonymous:

Blah, blah, blah.










Quoting ProudMommy51006:

Everything in life isn't always black and white. It's not always as easy as, a penis. There is so much more that goes into gender than a body part. Chromosomes, hormones, etc.












Quoting Anonymous:

If the boy is born with a penis he is a boy PERIOD.
















 






Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
Unicorn1110
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:13 PM
4 moms liked this

 If a 5 yr old boy knows he wants to kiss a 5 yr old girl why can't he know he wants to kiss the boy instead or feels like a girl instead of a boy? I would rather have a happy well adjusted child no matter how they identify than a child who is so miserable they want to commit suicide. Your child's journey will be hard, but with you by his side he is all ready a step ahead of many. Keep it up and good luck.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 91 on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:14 PM
2 moms liked this
U need to go to hell. In a hand basket. Who in the hell do you think you are? it takes a strong person to deal with this as commendably as this mom is. Parenting is unconditional love no matter what! I feel for your children...probably can't wait until they turn 18 to get away from your misinformed ass.


Quoting Anonymous:

Does she or he or it have a penis?? Well if the answer is yes then she has been watching to much of that MTD and the music that's played on it like Lady GaGa and Madonna and Britney kissing each other on the music awards...20 years ago this would have never happened because there would not be all this crap ruining these poor kids mind....now you better get a handle on this A.S.A.P a good old fashioned spanking is what I would recommended you do....do NOT listen to these other woman on her...listen to me...I care about your child and the life of hell they will have to live...you must show her discipline and no better way to do it then how they did it when I was a little girl growing up....take it from grandma here ....these other ladies on this site are to young to give you guidance they have grown up in the days of the devil.....here is what you must do to rid your child from SATAN!!!! Take her in the room and give her a good spanking, get to your church this Sunday and if you don't attend one then make sure to find your nearest Catholic church, take away all the televisions in the house and I am not sure if she has been possessed by the devil so you might want to have a exorcism done.AND PRAY, PRAY PRAY!!!

NickandKodasMom
by Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:14 PM
2 moms liked this
You are a freaking lunatic. Exorcism? Really? Get a freaking life. This child is not "filled with a demon spirit" Jeez.


Quoting Anonymous:

Does she or he or it have a penis?? Well if the answer is yes then she has been watching to much of that MTD and the music that's played on it like Lady GaGa and Madonna and Britney kissing each other on the music awards...20 years ago this would have never happened because there would not be all this crap ruining these poor kids mind....now you better get a handle on this A.S.A.P a good old fashioned spanking is what I would recommended you do....do NOT listen to these other woman on her...listen to me...I care about your child and the life of hell they will have to live...you must show her discipline and no better way to do it then how they did it when I was a little girl growing up....take it from grandma here ....these other ladies on this site are to young to give you guidance they have grown up in the days of the devil.....here is what you must do to rid your child from SATAN!!!! Take her in the room and give her a good spanking, get to your church this Sunday and if you don't attend one then make sure to find your nearest Catholic church, take away all the televisions in the house and I am not sure if she has been possessed by the devil so you might want to have a exorcism done.AND PRAY, PRAY PRAY!!!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Marath03
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:15 PM

you rockYou're freakin awesome!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:15 PM

 

This

Quoting Anonymous:

that child aint a girl. its a boy that has some mental issues....


 

bluebird24
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:15 PM

Good for you! Although I have no way of knowing how I'd react if my son came to me with the same self realization, I'd like to believe I would be as strong and loving as you have been to your daughters. Erin is a very brave little girl. It had to be hard enough to admit to herself who she really is, especially at such a young age, but to admit to you and others without being sure of the reaction is downright heroic. I wish the best for your family!

fanci64
by Silver Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:16 PM

Your a wonderful mom and you have beautiful children. Love and happiness to you all. you rock

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