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Mother of a Transgendered Child

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Hello!

My name is Jennifer, I am 31 years old and the mother of two amazing children. My oldest child is 11 years old and really intelligent. Now, I know parents say that a lot about their children but she really is very smart. She is 11 years old and already taking high school credits and next year she will be taking college credits. She is spunky and has a mind and style all her own. She never follows the crowd and is a trend setter at her school.

My youngest is also just as awesome and unique. My youngest came and sat me down about 2 months ago. Actually, my oldest came to me first and said, "Mom, Erin and I have something that we need to talk to you about." That is when I sat down with my kids and had my youngest tell me, "Mom, I'm a girl." I had no idea what to think at first; you see, Erin had been in fact born Aaron, a boy. Now, I have seen the signs since she was very young but always would tell her that she is a boys and boys don't dress or act that way. When my kids sat me down, however, it hit me. Erin had been confiding in her sister for a while; they would dress up together in private, too afraid to tell me cause Erin did not want to disappoint me. I thought it over for a minute and thought about how I have always told my kids they could be whatever they wanted to be, that I would always love them because I am their mother. I realized I could not be upset, that no matter what, this is still my child; my child I gave birth to and have loved and still love with all my heart and soul.

Ever since Erin has came out to me and people around her, she has been a totally different child; happier and more at peace. Erin used to be an introvert and a troublemaker at home. She would throw tantrums, backtalk, and try to cause self harm, but ever since she has came out to the world, she is very lovable, very well behaved, and has so many friends. I have seen so many people point accusing fingers at me, telling me that somehow this is my fault and that I am crazy for allowing Erin to be herself instead of boy. They did not see the child before the transformation.

I want parents and everyone to think about something before pointing fingers and making accusations. Think about how I said my child was self harming before coming out. It was scary not knowing how to help my child because they felt alone. You can't tell me therapy would have been suffice because I tried therapy and hospitalization, cause I did not know at the time why Erin was self harming. Trust me, nothing worked. But ever since Erin has came out to me and has support now from therapist and me, she has done a total turn around.

As a parent, it is our duty to protect our children and love them forever. It is our duty to nurture them and encourage them. On top of all that, though, it is not our job to tell them what they can or cannot be. We need to help them find their talents and to nurture those talents. Love them unconditionally.

by on Jan. 25, 2013 at 10:46 AM
Replies (641-650):
mel4him
by Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:01 PM
2 moms liked this


As a Christian mom myself, I have to disagree with you. I do agree that God makes no mistakes. And since He does not, it is clear that this child was born a boy. The mistake here is in the action of the mother in regard to her son. This mom allowed satan to attack her child and she agreed with it. God didn't make the mistake. This mom did when she allowed her son to act on desires and feelings that are not from God, but from satan. Saying that this child was born male by God, yet his brain is that of a girl contradicts foundational Christian doctrine and the Judeo-Christian sexual ethic.

Quoting 2ofthesame:

I wanna say you are a good mom. Someday the day will come when a child like this will not feel afraid to be who they are no matter the gender parts they are born with. Just like Lady Gaga says, Born This Way.. That is how God created a person, it's the way the chemical in their brains fire.. And to call them wrong or you wrong for accepting that is like saying God makes mistake.. And he doesn't make them, humans do. Thank god that child was given to you and not these other closed minded bigots who feel they know better then the God who created them.


John 3:16
For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son,
that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

itsaparent
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:03 PM
1 mom liked this

Thank you for posting.  You are an awesome mother and parent to unconditionally love your children and trust their instincts.  There are so many parents who are more concerned about what others think than what is best for their children.

You should be the Mother of the Year !bow down

mel4him
by Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:04 PM
1 mom liked this

Bigotry is what you posted in your comment. In my comment, I speak God's truth in love. Sometimes that is hard to comprehend for those who do not know God. Nevertheless, it is still God's truth.

Quoting 2ofthesame:

Satan attacks using bigots like you to spread hatred. Keep up the good work losers.. You still have a hard road ahead of you, your breed is a dying kind, just not dying off fast enough enough to make this world better off.


Quoting godsgirl26:

Sad i know :(



Quoting mel4him:

He is your child. However, satan is a liar and has attacked both you and your child and you let him.



John 3:16
For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son,
that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

NickandKodasMom
by Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:04 PM
You are an amazing mother. Be proud of your daughters and the fact that you have raised them in such a way that they were comfortable enough to sit you down and tell you. All these Anon idiots need to grow up and get a life. Their poor children will never know the feeling of such a loving parent as you.
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Anthonys_mommy1
by Bronze Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:04 PM

Awesome job mama. I wish more people would be as accepting as you. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:06 PM
So how is this going to work in school since anatomically, Erin is male? They will make her go to male gym class and male bathrooms. Are you going to get her on breast growing hormones and have gender reassignment surgery? Are her peers just as accepting?
CrazyLife1996
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:07 PM
Reading this just makes me smile. Your girls are so blessed to have such a wonderful loving mother.

I'm truly happy to know she is finding the peace she needs.
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Redwall
by Bronze Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:08 PM

You are a GREAT parent!  Protect your child from those that are just hateful...I so admire you.

KatieCat2003
by Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:09 PM
Good for you, and for her!!! I have a couple friends who are trans (m-f) and I'm stillstruggling to understand it *I ACCEPT them for who they are, but knew them as men before they told me and my mind is lagging a bit, and one still has to live as male full time*. I'm sure from a parent position it comes as a bit of surprise, even if you saw signs.

I wish every parent of a more unique child could be so accepting as you are!! :-) I have my own closet of bones I'd love to tell my family about but I has (hopfully non-rational) fear they may not accept whole I truely am.

*hugs and happiness to you and your family!! :-D*
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 26, 2013 at 7:09 PM
Does she or he or it have a penis?? Well if the answer is yes then she has been watching to much of that MTD and the music that's played on it like Lady GaGa and Madonna and Britney kissing each other on the music awards...20 years ago this would have never happened because there would not be all this crap ruining these poor kids mind....now you better get a handle on this A.S.A.P a good old fashioned spanking is what I would recommended you do....do NOT listen to these other woman on her...listen to me...I care about your child and the life of hell they will have to live...you must show her discipline and no better way to do it then how they did it when I was a little girl growing up....take it from grandma here ....these other ladies on this site are to young to give you guidance they have grown up in the days of the devil.....here is what you must do to rid your child from SATAN!!!! Take her in the room and give her a good spanking, get to your church this Sunday and if you don't attend one then make sure to find your nearest Catholic church, take away all the televisions in the house and I am not sure if she has been possessed by the devil so you might want to have a exorcism done.AND PRAY, PRAY PRAY!!!
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