Two condoms
- 19 Replies
Share some dirty jokes.
What's the difference between Michael phelps and hitler?
Only one can finish a race.
Mommy whale and baby whale are swimming along happily when all of a sudden the mommy is killed by a whaling ship's harpoon (super sad face).
Baby whale vows that from that day on, every boat he sees he will tip over, and eat all the sailors aboard.
Several years go by and the baby whale is all groweded up, out for a swim with his new wifey whale when all of a sudden he spots a ship just over the horizon.
He tells his wifey whale he wants to tip the ship in memory of his mother so she reluctantly agrees because she love him and shit.
So they swim under the ship and blow really really hard from their blow holes and tip the ship.
He looks at his wife and says, "Great work honey! Now lets go eat all the sailors!"
She says, "Oh no motherfucker, you got me to do the blow job, but I will NOT swallow the seamen".
A NY woman says she is taking a vacation to TX. She says she wants to watch a real rodeo, take in some real BBQ, and have sex with a real cowboy. She comes back home and all her girlfriends start asking questions.
She says "The rodeo was so awesome, these men jump off the back of a horse running full speed on to a cows back. Then they throw the cow to the ground. The BBQ was so delicious and smelled amazing. It was cooked with a tree called mesquite." She went quite as the other girls gossiped about rodeo and BBQ. Finally someone asked "How about the sex with a cowboy? How was that?" The girl then proceed with "I didn't do that, after seeing the size of the condoms in their back pocket, NO WAY."
source: http://www.jokes4us.com/
Quoting barrelracer1699:A NY woman says she is taking a vacation to TX. She says she wants to watch a real rodeo, take in some real BBQ, and have sex with a real cowboy. She comes back home and all her girlfriends start asking questions.
She says "The rodeo was so awesome, these men jump off the back of a horse running full speed on to a cows back. Then they throw the cow to the ground. The BBQ was so delicious and smelled amazing. It was cooked with a tree called mesquite." She went quite as the other girls gossiped about rodeo and BBQ. Finally someone asked "How about the sex with a cowboy? How was that?" The girl then proceed with "I didn't do that, after seeing the size of the condoms in their back pocket, NO WAY."
The Skoal Can ring. Most people who chew put their chew in the back pocket and makes the "ring"
Quoting sweetieiv:
I hate to be the party pooper and all but umm I don't get it lol. Can you please explain?
Quoting barrelracer1699:
A NY woman says she is taking a vacation to TX. She says she wants to watch a real rodeo, take in some real BBQ, and have sex with a real cowboy. She comes back home and all her girlfriends start asking questions.
She says "The rodeo was so awesome, these men jump off the back of a horse running full speed on to a cows back. Then they throw the cow to the ground. The BBQ was so delicious and smelled amazing. It was cooked with a tree called mesquite." She went quite as the other girls gossiped about rodeo and BBQ. Finally someone asked "How about the sex with a cowboy? How was that?" The girl then proceed with "I didn't do that, after seeing the size of the condoms in their back pocket, NO WAY."
I think my husband's a sociopath