I will never ever get this out of my head again. Ever... :'(
The nightmares come unexpected and are extremely life like and graphic...
Last night was the worst one yet.
I dreamed we (dh, dd, ds & I) were in a house or an institute maybe, with lots of other people.
We were playing a game, it wasn't optional and we couldn't leave (I don't know why, it didn't make much sense) but the rules were, if anyone disturbs or is loud/rowdy, they get killed, not up for debate and no questions asked.
Well we were sitting in a group talking and my daughter (3) was in our room calling me.
All of the sudden one of the other women gets up and gets her. I yank her out of her arms and beg not to hurt her but I can't do anything about it. I beg them to kill me instead but they won't let me.
She has to say good bye to daddy and ds and she doesn't know what's happening, she thought we were just going some where. She gives them kisses and says bye.
I just lost it, I started kicking and screaming and fighting for her life. Somehow we ended up in this room and the woman took a carpenters knife faster than I could react, she slashed at dd's throat and I yanked her away and tried running for it and in the dream she slashed my thumb. Then she slashed again and cut her throat. I started screaming and crying and shaking, my husband woke me up, I couldn't calm down, I ran in her room and checked on her and she was sleeping, I gave her a kiss and covered her up and she woke up and said thanks momma and I lost it again, I ran outside to get some air, I couldn't breathe and my heart hurt so bad. I couldn't deal with this dream... I finally went back inside and fainted in front of the bed. This morning when I was getting dd ready (it was the hardest thing in the world to not cry in front of her) and she gave me a kiss and asked if I was ok, dh had to take her, I couldn't stop bawling. Even now as I'm typing this I got tears streaming down my face.
The whole dream was so "real" that my thumb still hurts where I got slashed in the dream...
I'm stuck at work and I don't think I can deal with this all day.
I don't know what to do anymore about these dreams...