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Send your kid to daycare he said...ETA

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
My sons pedi advised us to send our LO to daycare so he can develop social skills. He was 13 months at the time. I feel like I'm depriving him of that but everyone around me says he is doing great and is best at home with me. We are living comfortably enough for me to stay home with my LO and I want to know how many mamas did NOT send their children to daycare or anything of that sort and had kids with fine social skills. Should add he does not have any cousins and is the first born of his generation. We're waiting on family to bring more kids into the family.



ETA: I looked into some of the options mothers gave. The local YMCA closed in may of 2012 here, and our library does have story time. I found a Montessori play group, and contacted them. I had no idea this post would become featured. It's going to take me a while to reply but thank to you all of you mamas who remained respectful.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2013 at 3:44 AM
Replies (21-30):
sweetieiv
by Ruby Member on Jan. 27, 2013 at 3:57 AM
1 mom liked this
My 3 yr old doesn't go to day care and he does well with out it. I take him to indoor play grounds where I can watch him and he plays with other children there.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
DonnaPinitonya
by on Jan. 27, 2013 at 3:57 AM

Are you religous? DD's love the play room at church and some churchs have MOPS or something similar... MOTHERS OF PRESCHOOLERS, usally newborn through 5 so kids can socialize and moms or dads can have parent interaction. 


Quoting Anonymous:

That's a good idea his father and I would like for him to be in some kind of sport when he's older. His choice though


Quoting DonnaPinitonya:

I can't afford day care anymore so I sign DD1 up for activites through the city. Look into those, the cost less and run shorter so you can try different things. 




Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2013 at 3:57 AM
1 mom liked this

I sent my first to preschool for a few months when he was 5 because I felt that guilt trip too, like I had deprived him and he wouldn't be ready for kindergarten. There wasn't anything horrible about it, but it was completely unnecessary for us and we decided to use that money for karate instead (:  My second won't be put in preschool either

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2013 at 3:57 AM
He has seen them at the park and small encounters. Nothing that qualifies as good enough for the pedi /:


Quoting deepthinker:

Maybe the doctor sees a lack in your child hitting his milestones properly in the social arena.  You stated that you were waiting on other family to have children to bring others into the family and your child is an only child.  Is your child being social with any children in his age group?

I don't think you have to send your child to daycare to socialize them, even though I think it is a good way to do so, but what bothers me is it sounds like your child is not exposed to other children at all.  I think children need some time to spend with other children.  I don't think SAHM should send their kids to daycare all day though, but I do think they need to spend time with other children their age.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2013 at 4:00 AM
One friend has a newborn who clearly can't play yet. I've seen her mom but the baby is still very tiny. He has distant relatives with kids, and it's 3-6 hours of a drive to see them. SO and I broke the lead into the next generation.


Quoting Byrd15:

Oh come on there has to be a few people in town with kids. It doesn't have to be all kids who are 13 months, they can be younger or older too. :)



Quoting Anonymous:

There are no kids his age I can arrange for them with. He sees them at the park or at the store, etc.






Quoting Byrd15:

My 2 siblings and I never did, and my children won't. It's a personal choice.



Why not have play dates? In your own home for a few hours a week, those are always fun! <3


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2013 at 4:01 AM
I get it haha I see those kids all the time.


Quoting happy41ce:

They talk to anyone and everyone. My kids are people person(s). If that makes sense. LOL


Quoting Anonymous:

How did they all turn out social wise ?





Quoting happy41ce:

never EVER.

I will not send baby #5 either..






Byrd15
by on Jan. 27, 2013 at 4:02 AM
Aw! Im sorry!
That's all the advice I have but these other ladies offered even better advice! :) I hope it works out great for you! <3


Quoting Anonymous:

One friend has a newborn who clearly can't play yet. I've seen her mom but the baby is still very tiny. He has distant relatives with kids, and it's 3-6 hours of a drive to see them. SO and I broke the lead into the next generation.




Quoting Byrd15:

Oh come on there has to be a few people in town with kids. It doesn't have to be all kids who are 13 months, they can be younger or older too. :)





Quoting Anonymous:

There are no kids his age I can arrange for them with. He sees them at the park or at the store, etc.








Quoting Byrd15:

My 2 siblings and I never did, and my children won't. It's a personal choice.




Why not have play dates? In your own home for a few hours a week, those are always fun! <3


Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
deepthinker
by on Jan. 27, 2013 at 4:03 AM
1 mom liked this



Quoting Anonymous:

He has seen them at the park and small encounters. Nothing that qualifies as good enough for the pedi /:


Quoting deepthinker:

Maybe the doctor sees a lack in your child hitting his milestones properly in the social arena.  You stated that you were waiting on other family to have children to bring others into the family and your child is an only child.  Is your child being social with any children in his age group?

I don't think you have to send your child to daycare to socialize them, even though I think it is a good way to do so, but what bothers me is it sounds like your child is not exposed to other children at all.  I think children need some time to spend with other children.  I don't think SAHM should send their kids to daycare all day though, but I do think they need to spend time with other children their age.


Seeing kids at the park or store is not socializing them, and building social skills.  They need to interact with other children regularly.  You said you don't even have play-dates.  I think your pediatrician has a point, from the information you've given here.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2013 at 4:03 AM
1 mom liked this
Thank you I appreciate it.


Quoting Byrd15:

Aw! Im sorry!

That's all the advice I have but these other ladies offered even better advice! :) I hope it works out great for you! <3




Quoting Anonymous:

One friend has a newborn who clearly can't play yet. I've seen her mom but the baby is still very tiny. He has distant relatives with kids, and it's 3-6 hours of a drive to see them. SO and I broke the lead into the next generation.






Quoting Byrd15:

Oh come on there has to be a few people in town with kids. It doesn't have to be all kids who are 13 months, they can be younger or older too. :)







Quoting Anonymous:

There are no kids his age I can arrange for them with. He sees them at the park or at the store, etc.










Quoting Byrd15:

My 2 siblings and I never did, and my children won't. It's a personal choice.





Why not have play dates? In your own home for a few hours a week, those are always fun! <3



luckystars2012
by Silver Member on Jan. 27, 2013 at 4:04 AM
1 mom liked this

So you be a responsible parent and find a good one.  My dds daycare had cameras in every room that I could log into remotely and view the classrooms and playgrounds.  

Its not that hard nowadays,  but by not socializing your kid you are setting him up for problems.


Quoting Anonymous:

I worked in daycare and that has been my biggest reason for not putting him in it. I've seen the truth behind the curtains.


Quoting luckystars2012:

I have almost always worked so my DD has been in daycare.  What I can tell you is that I spend a lot of time volunteering at my DDs kindergarten class, and in general the kids with the most social issues are the kids who have not been in a social setting with other kids. 

Playdates simply arent enough.  you dont have to put yoru kid in daycare full time, but a half day a couple of times a week makes a big difference.




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