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What is his role in all of this?

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In your opinion, what should be the role of the father in the early months of a child's life?  

I have newborn twins, and I am curious what responsibilities most dads have.  Tell me a little about your husband's role in your child's babyhood.  What did he do?  How did you feel about his role?


**I would really like to get an accurate picture of how most couples handle new baby responsibilities, so please include any relevant information that explains your personal situation.  IE: "I did everything on my own because he was deployed." or "My husband took care of as many feedings and diaperings as me, but he was unemployed at the time."

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by on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:56 PM
Replies (71-73):
Stephd710
by Platinum Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:17 PM
Thanks. It's been tough, but luckily I had good babies, ate good slept good and were very sweet. I've never been an "i can't" person. I just suck it up and say "this is my life, better make it work!"


Quoting LuLuThatsWho:

Wow.  You're a strong woman.  I desperately hope that this struggle doesn't lead me down that path.  I don't want to be a single mom of four small kids! :(

Thanks for the reminder that it has been and can be done alone, though!  It's easy to get caught up in the "I can't" mindset. 



Quoting Stephd710:

My husband was in our home exactly one month after my twins were born.  Then we split up and he moved out.  I basically did everything on my own from the day we came home because he worked 12 hour shifts and then would go out with his friends (and girlfriend) after work (the reason for our split).  I didnt ask for other family help because I thought that I might as well learn to do it on my own because they werent going to help me forever.  After two months, the girls started visitation with my ex.  From then on, he has taken them every other weekend. He seems to do fine with them.  They are 2 years old now. 





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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:24 PM
my SO worked, but he did help when he was needed. So if I was cooking he would feed or change the baby. But at night and during the day, i did it all. That is untill we had twin girls! I had to have both girls on the same schedule or I would never get any sleep, so he would get up with me, help get the bottles, help me set up and he would either stay and help with one baby, or he would go back to bed. But anytime I needed him he would help! He is a great man and wonderful father!
LuLuThatsWho
by Platinum Member on Jan. 28, 2013 at 8:42 PM

I breastfeed, but this is exactly what I had in mind going into this adventure.  He would get up with me until things were under control (diapers changed, set up to nurse).


Quoting Anonymous:

my SO worked, but he did help when he was needed. So if I was cooking he would feed or change the baby. But at night and during the day, i did it all. That is untill we had twin girls! I had to have both girls on the same schedule or I would never get any sleep, so he would get up with me, help get the bottles, help me set up and he would either stay and help with one baby, or he would go back to bed. But anytime I needed him he would help! He is a great man and wonderful father!



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