I was diagnosed with depression when I was twenty years old, although I've been suffering with it since about fourteen. I've been on and off treatments for six years, longest I've been off has been almost three years, due to lack of insurance. I was doing okay during those three years, I had my moments but it never got as bad as it's been before or as bad as it is now. The depression bouts only lasted about a day, sometimes two, and then I'd pick myself up and move on.
For the last two weeks it's been severe. Suicidal thoughts (which is nothing new to me), constant crying over anything, yelling at everyone for nothing. I dont want to be around DH, and can't enjoy the kids like I should, I just want to be alone. I haven't cleaned the house in god knows when, and laundry is slipping...DH has been yelling at me to do the dishes or clean something for the last few days and as much as I know it needs to be done, I just can't get myself picked up enough to do it. I stopped eating. Basically stopped caring about anything anymore.
I know I should go to the doctor but I can't even bring myself to do that.