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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Who pays the bills in your house?

Posted by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:29 PM
  • 64 Replies
Dh and I have been together for 4 years and married for 2. He is extremely frugal and it literally pains him to spend any money at all whereas I am not so frugal and like to splurge on Starbucks, pedicures, cute things for the baby, etc.. We both work and make about equal salaries.

For our entire relationship I have been deemed responsible for the finances. I am okay with this (though not really) because I am organized and just overall better at getting the bills paid on time, as dh simply doesn't "like" phones or computers or snail mail so in general it's just easier and less stressful for me to do it.

A huge problem always comes to play because of this. Around the end of the month Dh will ask how much money is left and I will say "x amount" and he will get pissed/depressed and say things like "Oh....I had really hoped to go golfing tomorrow but now I don't feel comfortable because we don't have any money." Which is bullshit because we absolutely CAN afford a round of golf. I told him to go play and he said no and started bitching about how he never has any clue where all his money goes and how he has nothing to show for his hard work. I said as nicely as I could after having this conversation approximately two million times that I would REALLY appreciate it if he took more responsibility for the finances and in the least log on to our bank account once in awhile to check the status.

His response? "I don't know the password and its easier just to ask you." He does know the password and how to log on though. If he would just look at the freaking account he would know and I wouldn't have to deal with the drama every month.

I would LOVE it if he did the grocery shopping and bill paying so he could actually SEE where it all goes but he acts like such a big baby when it comes to that sort of stuff.

I mean seriously what the hell, man up and take some responsibility for yourself!!
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by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
aprilmcgraw
by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:31 PM
2 moms liked this
Bills??Damn I knew I forgot something.
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happinessforyou
by Gold Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:32 PM
1 mom liked this

He sounds like a baby not a grown man with a family. Ask him why he refuses to grow up in a "financial" sense? Ask him what he would do if he had to have this kind of a conversation with his boss? Would he take some responsibility then?

Of course it's "easier" for him to let you do all the work... sigh......

Tesserae
by Mrs.Mellark on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:33 PM

he does. i used to but he didn't respect the budget and it stressed me out. i turned everything over to him and now I am worry free.

stephiebugg
by Gold Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:33 PM

 WE pay the bills. It's a group effort here. LOL We both make money, and we both spend it on the bills. We budget together.
It sounds nicer than it really is, we do have moments of "Oh, crap, that's due already?!", "Did the mortgage payment go out yet?" or "our account looks short because I paid the electric bill already!" LOL
I try not to stress much, as long as bills get paid, I'm happy.

mommyof11050307
by Platinum Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:33 PM
1 mom liked this
I do it all. He asks me how much money we have but doesn't act like a baby if its not his liking.
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Nicoleb9
by Emerald Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:33 PM
But this way he gets to blame it all on you!
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:34 PM

 Wow...make him sit down with you when you pay the bills, and give him the receipt for groceries.

ALWsMomma
by on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:34 PM
I pay the bills Dh makes the $. He never asks about it though.
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lizzie_ann
by Platinum Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:35 PM
1 mom liked this

No one. All of our bills are paid automatically. 
We both monitor our financial status on a pretty much daily basis though.  

lnrmom
by Ruby Member on Jan. 29, 2013 at 4:35 PM

This is precisely why we have seperate accounts. I tell SO what I need to cover the bills, and he gives it to me.

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