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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My 13 yo dd cuts herself!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
She carved the word "sorry" into her arm back in December . I took her to therapy n tried my best to spend as much time with her as possible.
She seemed to be getting better then I saw a pic on her Instagram acct where her legs were all cut up. There were also many other disturbing pics. Not of her but just depressing stuff.
I am at a loss. Has any one been thru this n can give me some advice please?
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:28 AM
Replies (21-24):
LucyHourglass
by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:25 AM

I used to be a cutter. i started at age 11. get her help. my parents sent me to a residential treatment center when i was 13. not everyone can afford that kinda thing tho, if you want to PM me i can talk to you more about it and try to help you. I still have scars and i cant even begin to tell you how embarrasing it is. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:31 AM

It's supposed to be a secret. I started cutting when I was 13, and by the time I was 17 I had been hospitalized twice for attempted suicide. It never would have occurred to me to cut a part of my body that someone could see much less take pictures of it. Your dd wants attention. Cutting and taking pics of it makes that pretty clear as far as I'm concerned. Is she still in therapy?

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:45 AM

My DD started cutting at 13.  Initially I was shocked!  She is a straight "A" student, popular, athletic, overall a perfectionist which of course was the problem.  So much stress for a kid who wants to be perfect.  I immediately put her in therapy and it was HARD for her and for me.  Sometimes she attended the sessions alone and sometimes we attended together which let her, in a very controlled setting, express some of the things that she was anxious about.  It took about six months, two years later we still have the occasional follow up sessions, but it was so worth it.  I think as a mom we sometimes feel we can fix things with lots of love and understanding.  For us, it took a professional to help us sort things out.  I would continue with the therapy, perhaps even look for a different therapist - one specializing with teen issues - if you or your daughter doesn't click with the one you are currently seeing.  The problem with jumping into medicating is that it doesn't necessarily teach your daughter the coping skills.  If your therapist recommends you seek medication for our daughter, then I would consider that route but not as a first step.  

Honestly, with the right help your DD will come out of this with a much stronger sense of self worth and the coping mechanisms to deal, in a healthy way, with the teen years and on.

Corina1987
by Bronze Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 1:18 PM
Thanks tomary


Quoting Corina1987:

I went through this off and on throughout my life. Im glad I didnt get on meds because I was forced to learn better coping skills. There are things you can do such as taking deep breaths,naming objects around you(forces you into the present and out the past/future),call someone. The best thing for her is to be able to have you or someone she trusts she can talk to at that moment she feels like shes going to hurt herself.Let her know you are there without judgement. Counseling would help too. I wish you all the best.

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