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So what is the big deal? Yes I am a woman who does not ave a job outside of the house. I love my family to death but these conversations that we have had especially my father saying maybe you should go back to school and get back to work and my uncle tells me that I should not have my life revolve around DS only because when he grows up I won't have really done anything for myself, I might lose myself. In the beginning my mother was not thrilled to learn that her only daughter has decided to depend on her DH.

She went back to school while working and graduated with  4.0 and has been the breadwinner in the family when my SD (step-dad) decided that he did not want to be a banker anymore. I know that they are concerned for me and my well being but it can be frustrating to know they think I could be doing more or something else with my life. 

Did anyone oppose your life decisions?

by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:15 PM
Replies (21-30):
by Platinum Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:45 PM
2 moms liked this

You are accomplishing way more imo than you would in the workforce. Molding a young person is an extremely important job that I don't think SHOULD be outsourced to people who don't love your kid(s). I HAVE had some flak from dh for it. He was a bachelor a loooong time and got rather used to his several hundred dollars every pay period to just blow on stupid stuff, and with me not working, and him suddenly supporting a wife and three kids, now he has only 2 or 3 hundred to blow on stupid stuff every month, lol, (to clarify, I have practically NO fun money). He wants me to work so I can pay some of the bills, but after I made him realize we would NOT be coming out ahead financially with me working, mostly due to the cost of child care, he has come around to the idea of me staying at home for now.

   I think if it's not financially advantagious for both parents to work, or if one partner makes enough to support the whole family, and both don't WANT to work outside the home and be away from their kids, then one parent should stay home, and it doesn't even always have to be the wife.

  As for the 'depending on a man' comment. In our modern, feminist and divorce happy society 'depending on a man' is considered a terrible and stupid thing to do, and yes, it can be difficult if the rug gets pulled out from under you and you split up, BUT think about it, he depends on you as much as you do him. You take care of his kids and his home. How would he managed if you up and died or something? He'd then have to take care of the kid, earn the income, and etc... ALL BY HIMSELF!, and I'm betting it would be too much for him to handle, unless he could afford a really good nanny. That's what I think of all the time. As hard as it would be for me if I suddenly didn't have my dh, it would be harder for him if he didn't have me.

by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:45 PM


Quoting meangreen18:

 i love being a stay at home mom! if i want to go back to school or work i will have plemty of time to do so when my children are a little older.


Lilypie Maternity tickers
by Gold Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:46 PM
1 mom liked this

 I get frustrated by this too. Why was being a SAHM (back then they were just called Moms) ok for our grandmas or great grandamas (and so on) but not ok for us?

by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:46 PM

I'm with you.  Not the right fit for me.  I work 3 long shifts a week to have 4 days home which is nice.  

Quoting peanutsmommy1:

I admire SAHM's, but I have never had a desire to be one. I am woman enough to admit it is not for me.

by Bronze Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:46 PM

I have a feeling my dad does but he's to polite to say it. Lol. But he has asked me if I have any intentions on returning to school or seeking employment. My own mother didn't work until I turned 13 so this shouldn't be a foreign concept to him. But I know he wants more for me.

Right now my twins are 7. I've stayed home their entire lives and I honestly like it. Once the children came it was a choice Dh and I made together- that I would be a SAHM. I like being available for my kids. Now, I'm NOT knocking the working moms at all. Do what you do and earn that money. Go girl! But for right now being a SAHM is right for me. I may feel differently as the kids get older. I'll cross that bridge when I get there.

by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:46 PM
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by Anonymous 6 on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:47 PM

Me too!

Quoting Anonymous:

Yup. My mother in law. I don't speak to her anymore.

by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:47 PM
What are you going for your masters in? Something health care related I'm guessing? (Since you said you're a medical transcriptionist)

Quoting AmyL3469:

My husband's grandmother told me I need to stop mooching off of him. Are you kidding me? I'm in college and I plan on getting my masters degree. I stay home, take care of our kids, and I've been looking for part-time medical transcription work since I have my diploma for that as well. Mooch... grrr.

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by Gold Member on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:48 PM

I am an attorney that quit practicing when my son was born.  I think that some people think that I am wasting my potential.

by Anonymous 4 on Jan. 30, 2013 at 12:48 PM
Look at the title of the post.
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