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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Why does Daddy do drugs?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 9 Replies

Currently my dd is not allowed to see her father.  Legally, he has no rights to her because he is her step father and never actually adopted her...but he is the only father she has ever known.

But he is heavy into cocaine and other drugs and she is not safe with him.  At 10, I feel she is old enough to understand WHY she can't see him. 

I already know that one question is WHY does Daddy do drugs?

How do I explain to her the why?

This is what I was going to go for...

Drugs make Daddy feel kind of like you do after you perform (dance).  You have all this energy and are so happy.  That is the feeling that Daddy gets and it makes him feel good.  BUT when that wears off it is like you when you are really tired and had too much sugar but all that energy is out of your body.  He doesn't know how to stop.  He doesn't know how to get that feeling in another way like you do.  They have him in their grip kind of like King Kong in a monster movie.  Once you try drugs they don't let you go.  Until Daddy gets the help he needs he is not safe for you to be around.

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:22 AM
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Replies (1-9):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:23 AM
Sounds pretty good to me, sorry your family has to go thru that.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:27 AM

My DH was addicted to cocaine and other drugs.  I left him and didn't want him around our children because I didn't feel as though they were safe with him.  They were 1 & 4 at the time.  I told my 4yr old that daddy was being really bad.  DH went into rehab in order for me to even consider coming back home with the kids.  I told my 4yr that daddy had to go to big boy time out because he was being very bad.  He has been clean since Oct 7th 2012, we have since moved back home.  DH has been showing me he really wants to stay clean and work on his relationship with the family.  I'm praynig he stays clean.  I think you explained it the best you can to her.  I hope he gets help for his sake and your daughters.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:30 AM

 

He has been in and out of rehab.  In and out of hospitals.  Lost his job...career (military) and lost his family.  Until he decides he wants to change it just isn't going to happen.

Quoting Anonymous:

My DH was addicted to cocaine and other drugs.  I left him and didn't want him around our children because I didn't feel as though they were safe with him.  They were 1 & 4 at the time.  I told my 4yr old that daddy was being really bad.  DH went into rehab in order for me to even consider coming back home with the kids.  I told my 4yr that daddy had to go to big boy time out because he was being very bad.  He has been clean since Oct 7th 2012, we have since moved back home.  DH has been showing me he really wants to stay clean and work on his relationship with the family.  I'm praynig he stays clean.  I think you explained it the best you can to her.  I hope he gets help for his sake and your daughters.


 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:30 AM
I personally would say:
At this moment honey Daddy isn't able to be around us because of some very unhealthy habits he has picked up. When daddy isn't feeling his best he looks for something to make him feel better. These things that make daddy feel better are harmful to ones health and dangerous. Their mind becomes unfocused and it puts them in a not so healthy state. Until daddy gets the help he needs its best for us to keep a safe distance from him until he gets better.
* I commend you on having to do such a thing and I think it would be awesome and easier for her to follow if you gave references like you did above, good luck dear*
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:31 AM

If it were me...I wouldn't tell her why.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:33 AM

 She is 10.  She is amazingly smart.  She is not going to accept because....


Quoting Anonymous:

If it were me...I wouldn't tell her why.


 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:34 AM

 I totally understand where you are coming from.  Dh was in reahb before and relapsed that is why we left.  We couldn't and didn't deserve to live that life.  I think what you are doing is the right thing.  You need to protect your child.  Good luck and I'm sorry you have to go through this.

Quoting Anonymous:

 

He has been in and out of rehab.  In and out of hospitals.  Lost his job...career (military) and lost his family.  Until he decides he wants to change it just isn't going to happen.

Quoting Anonymous:

My DH was addicted to cocaine and other drugs.  I left him and didn't want him around our children because I didn't feel as though they were safe with him.  They were 1 & 4 at the time.  I told my 4yr old that daddy was being really bad.  DH went into rehab in order for me to even consider coming back home with the kids.  I told my 4yr that daddy had to go to big boy time out because he was being very bad.  He has been clean since Oct 7th 2012, we have since moved back home.  DH has been showing me he really wants to stay clean and work on his relationship with the family.  I'm praynig he stays clean.  I think you explained it the best you can to her.  I hope he gets help for his sake and your daughters.

 

 

 

beethann
by Platinum Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:34 AM

ummm...I dunno, I guess I wouldn't make drugs sound so....great....at the beginning?

Just my opinion though



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:38 AM
You're doing the right thing. Just be honest with her and tell her to pray for him. Hopefully he'll seek help and clean up his act.
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