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Why do women continue to be SAHM after the kids start school? *EDIT*

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Most women choose to be a SAHM mom so they can be there with the kids, right?  They say being a SAHM is a tough job, WHICH I AGREE with when the kids are there. So after the kids start school, why do they stay home? Just curious is all?

***EDIT***

This was honsetly a general question. I was not insulting SAHM. Just take a deep breath or a couple Xanax and calm down. I am not here to judge or fight with anyone. It was proven though, that it does not matter if you are a SAHM or a working mom... Some just never grow the FU!$ up. We are all moms here. We raise our children the way WE choose to. Unless a parent is completely neglecting their child or harming them in any way or just plain lazy, then there should be no judgement. I guess you could call me nosey or whatever, I dont care. Some of you need to put your big girl panties on and not take everything so personal.

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 5:58 PM
Replies (261-270):
MalakbelLacuna
by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:32 PM

kids dont go to school alllll day. and then there is summer break and so on.

ATALHEA
by Bronze Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:36 PM

It is very hard to get a job when you have been home for years. It is even harder to get a job during only school hours with every holiday, weekend, teacher work day, snow day, and sick child day off. I did go back to work last year when my youngest started school but I work as a substitute at the school. I couldn't even work as a full time teacher because I have 5 kids, 3 are special needs so we have a lot of docotrs and other appointments.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:50 PM
This post amazes me.



This isn't the 1800s anymore. Women have choices! A woman can choose to work or to stay home. A stay at home mom can choose to go back to work when her children are in school or she can choose to remain at home.



This constant belittling of the choices of other women baffles me. One side says the other is lazy, dependent, unequal. The other that they are selfish, uncaring, not raising their children. Both are wrong.



Do womankind a favor and respect each others choices.
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parentalrights1
by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:51 PM
I would try to get a job if I didnt have the kids during the day but every job I've ever been hired for has been night shift and they only left tenured employees have days
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la_bella_vita
by Bella on Feb. 1, 2013 at 9:13 PM
2 moms liked this

 Some of husband's make enough money that there is no need for a wife to work....*gasp*

NoahandEliza
by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 9:37 PM
I'm finding this anon very entertaining. It's hard for me to believe she actually feels this way, as if having a job defines who you are and what your worth is.

I, too, had a career before being sahm, and a very good one at that. That career caused me to miss out on so much that I didn't even realize at the time. Now that I've spent this time at home with my youngest, it makes me a little sad sometimes that my older child didn't get to have me there. He's perfectly happy and well adjusted, don't get me wrong, but we won't ever get to have the same kind of memories that dd and I have.

And just for the record, working definitely doesn't make you not lazy. I'm far more exhausted now than I ever was sitting in an office all day.


Quoting lucsch:

I was a working mom for 17 years with a real career and everything....honey, you are just fooling yourself, but you aren't fooling your kids. You've missed a lot. I know, because when I quit my job, I'd been a working mom up until my kids were 8, 10, and 15 years-old. I had another baby, so I'm in a unique position, 10 years later, to know BOTH sides of this argument well.

Go ahead and believe whatever makes you happy, but I know the truth.



Quoting Anonymous:

See, that's the misconception. I missed absolutely nothing. I was able to work AND be there for my kid. Just because I work doesn't mean I'm gone ALL DAY AND IT RUNS MY LIFE. But you don't work... You're too afraid to work, afraid it will mess up everything. I wouldn't expect you to understand that.





Quoting Anonymous:

how bitter. Mad you missed all your child's firsts while you were to busy working?





Quoting Anonymous:

Yep that's what you worthless pieces of shit do is give excuses to stay at home and not contribute to your household income. "Because who will be there for my kids when they get out of school?" After school care IF the job you had demanded you work for those hours on that particular day. "Who will go to PTA meetings?" Ugh, the world will not end if you don't attend every single meeting. "I have gardening to do" smfh. "The house needs to be cleaned" Uhhh, if no one is there to dirty it up then it should be a okay. Stop giving dumb ass excuses for your laziness.









Quoting rosaleeandtwo:

They give the excuse?









That's weird...my mom never needed an "excuse" to not work. Isn't it funny how times change in such a short time? I'm only in my early 30s and when I was young it was expected that many mothers didn't work. No excuse necessary lol.











Quoting Anonymous:

Because they are lazy and don't want to work. They give the excuse "to clean house" well that excuse doesn't work when we, working moms, use it. If there's no one there to dirty it up, then there should be no mess... Right? I mean that's what sahm tell us all the time when we say we have to come home from a long day at work and do the same stuff they've had all day to do.











It's because they are lazy little worms that don't want to work because their fragile bones couldn't handle it.










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lucsch
by Platinum Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 9:53 PM

Exactly.

Quoting NoahandEliza:

I'm finding this anon very entertaining. It's hard for me to believe she actually feels this way, as if having a job defines who you are and what your worth is.

I, too, had a career before being sahm, and a very good one at that. That career caused me to miss out on so much that I didn't even realize at the time. Now that I've spent this time at home with my youngest, it makes me a little sad sometimes that my older child didn't get to have me there. He's perfectly happy and well adjusted, don't get me wrong, but we won't ever get to have the same kind of memories that dd and I have.

And just for the record, working definitely doesn't make you not lazy. I'm far more exhausted now than I ever was sitting in an office all day.


Quoting lucsch:

I was a working mom for 17 years with a real career and everything....honey, you are just fooling yourself, but you aren't fooling your kids. You've missed a lot. I know, because when I quit my job, I'd been a working mom up until my kids were 8, 10, and 15 years-old. I had another baby, so I'm in a unique position, 10 years later, to know BOTH sides of this argument well.

Go ahead and believe whatever makes you happy, but I know the truth.



Quoting Anonymous:

See, that's the misconception. I missed absolutely nothing. I was able to work AND be there for my kid. Just because I work doesn't mean I'm gone ALL DAY AND IT RUNS MY LIFE. But you don't work... You're too afraid to work, afraid it will mess up everything. I wouldn't expect you to understand that.





Quoting Anonymous:

how bitter. Mad you missed all your child's firsts while you were to busy working?





Quoting Anonymous:

Yep that's what you worthless pieces of shit do is give excuses to stay at home and not contribute to your household income. "Because who will be there for my kids when they get out of school?" After school care IF the job you had demanded you work for those hours on that particular day. "Who will go to PTA meetings?" Ugh, the world will not end if you don't attend every single meeting. "I have gardening to do" smfh. "The house needs to be cleaned" Uhhh, if no one is there to dirty it up then it should be a okay. Stop giving dumb ass excuses for your laziness.









Quoting rosaleeandtwo:

They give the excuse?









That's weird...my mom never needed an "excuse" to not work. Isn't it funny how times change in such a short time? I'm only in my early 30s and when I was young it was expected that many mothers didn't work. No excuse necessary lol.











Quoting Anonymous:

Because they are lazy and don't want to work. They give the excuse "to clean house" well that excuse doesn't work when we, working moms, use it. If there's no one there to dirty it up, then there should be no mess... Right? I mean that's what sahm tell us all the time when we say we have to come home from a long day at work and do the same stuff they've had all day to do.











It's because they are lazy little worms that don't want to work because their fragile bones couldn't handle it.












1234abcd4321
by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 9:55 PM

this is what i was going to say. there's plenty to do.. if you are satisfied without a career and your family has enough money, why not? personally i love working and money haha, so while my kids are in school i'm working.


Quoting ethans_momma06:

There's still stuff to take care of around the house you know. Cleaning. Cooking. Running errands. Shuttling kids around. It's not like once the kids are out of the house that stuff is magically gone too.



zoo003
by Gold Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 10:12 PM

You seem very upset and angry about this.  If staying home isn't for you, then don't do it, but why do you feel the need to belittle someone else who chooses to stay at home?  Does it make your decision to go to work better?  Does it give you validation that you are doing a good job?  Do you know the circumstances behind the person's decision to stay home?  Do you know what their lives are like?  The truth is, it shouldn't make a difference to your life is someone stays home and you don't know everyone's story behind their decision to stay home.  You are making gross over exaggerations based upon your own perceptions and they are not right.  I guess I am just not understanding where the hostility is coming from.  There is no cookie cutter mold to parenting.  There is no "one way is the right way" to parenting.  There is no award handed out.  It isn't a competition.  I have known working mothers who are great.  I have known sahms who are great.  I have also known horrible working and sahm mothers.   Whether one works or doesn't work does not equate to good parenting or being a good person.  I would hope that you would realize that the decision to stay at home may not be for you, but it does not mean that someone who chooses it is less of a peson than you.  I hope that at some point in time, you can let go of this hostility.     

Quoting Anonymous:

See, that's the misconception. I missed absolutely nothing. I was able to work AND be there for my kid. Just because I work doesn't mean I'm gone ALL DAY AND IT RUNS MY LIFE. But you don't work... You're too afraid to work, afraid it will mess up everything. I wouldn't expect you to understand that.


Quoting Anonymous:

how bitter. Mad you missed all your child's firsts while you were to busy working?



Quoting Anonymous:

Yep that's what you worthless pieces of shit do is give excuses to stay at home and not contribute to your household income. "Because who will be there for my kids when they get out of school?" After school care IF the job you had demanded you work for those hours on that particular day. "Who will go to PTA meetings?" Ugh, the world will not end if you don't attend every single meeting. "I have gardening to do" smfh. "The house needs to be cleaned" Uhhh, if no one is there to dirty it up then it should be a okay. Stop giving dumb ass excuses for your laziness.






Quoting rosaleeandtwo:

They give the excuse?







That's weird...my mom never needed an "excuse" to not work. Isn't it funny how times change in such a short time? I'm only in my early 30s and when I was young it was expected that many mothers didn't work. No excuse necessary lol.








Quoting Anonymous:

Because they are lazy and don't want to work. They give the excuse "to clean house" well that excuse doesn't work when we, working moms, use it. If there's no one there to dirty it up, then there should be no mess... Right? I mean that's what sahm tell us all the time when we say we have to come home from a long day at work and do the same stuff they've had all day to do.









It's because they are lazy little worms that don't want to work because their fragile bones couldn't handle it.



 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 1, 2013 at 10:16 PM

I can afford to, I want to be there when my kids get home, I want to be there when they're out for the summer... I have no shortage of things I can do during the day, hobbies, working out, etc. 

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