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Why do women continue to be SAHM after the kids start school? *EDIT*

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Most women choose to be a SAHM mom so they can be there with the kids, right?  They say being a SAHM is a tough job, WHICH I AGREE with when the kids are there. So after the kids start school, why do they stay home? Just curious is all?


This was honsetly a general question. I was not insulting SAHM. Just take a deep breath or a couple Xanax and calm down. I am not here to judge or fight with anyone. It was proven though, that it does not matter if you are a SAHM or a working mom... Some just never grow the FU!$ up. We are all moms here. We raise our children the way WE choose to. Unless a parent is completely neglecting their child or harming them in any way or just plain lazy, then there should be no judgement. I guess you could call me nosey or whatever, I dont care. Some of you need to put your big girl panties on and not take everything so personal.

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 5:58 PM
Replies (221-230):
by Anonymous 36 on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:01 PM

I had every intention of going back to work after the kids go to school. However, my DH has been doing really well and we figured out that if I go back to work it would bump us up a tax bracket and screw us over. For every $1 I earn we would be paying at least that in taxes.  So, I have wrapped my head around the fact I probably won't go back to work after the kids go to school, if Dh is still doing this well. The first few months they are in school I will probably just chill and have time to myself, but after that I know I will be bored so I will probably go find some volunteer opprotunities.  Something to keep my resume fresh just in case. Even though I stay home now I do little things that could add to my resume here and there.

by Gold Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:01 PM

My youngest is still too young for school but I'm hoping to be able to be home when he does go off to school. It will give me a chance to help more at school, which I can't really do all the time with a toddler by side. It's not my only reason for wanting to be home, but it is a big one.

by Anonymous 34 on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:01 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm leaving this thread there are far too many judgemental women who should get over themselves. I have been a sahm, a working mom, and wahm. I don't judge a single mom for her choice. Each choice has its pros and cons and it is up to each mom what they choose to do and what works for their family. No mom is better than another because of the choice they make. We as moms should quit judging one another and support each other there are so many bigger problems in the world we could and should focus are attention on. I'm just disgusted by peoples lack of respect for one another.
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by Anonymous 30 on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:02 PM dad and I each work..him days. Kids never in daycare. we both tried being the SAH parent... I despised working all day while he sat at home....playing with the kids..watching TV. I hated when he needed to buy stuff for himself...that was my money...and it was lazy he wasn't making his own. I assume he thought the same. What would I do at xmas..and birthdays?? buy him stuff with his money??? How tacky... when I wanted clothes or shoes...spend his money??? How tacky... I'm an adult...not a child...and I don't need another person to care for me....

Quoting Anonymous:

Nope. no excuse. I wont apologize for making sure I made the right life decisions to let me be where I am now. I married a wonderful man who feels me being home is the most important thing. I married a man who had a great job and supports his family without PA.

Quoting Anonymous:

me too...I work a full time job at home and am able to do all that stuff. just another excuse....

Quoting Anonymous:

Lets see, if my kid is sick and cant go to school,I dont have to worry about missing work. If my kid gets sick at school, I dont have to worry about leaving work. If school is cancelled because of weather, Im not scrambling to find childcare. I can go on field trips, be there for my kid without worrying about a job. Im at the school several days a week helping out.

To ME, thats far more important than any amount of money I could be making

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:02 PM
1 mom liked this
I LOVE having a man take care of me! I don't need him to but love that he does :)

Quoting Anonymous:

not at all....I'm not low enough to need a man take care of me. I like being a responsible adult..and a good role models to my kids...especially my see that I can work...take care of the household and them at the same time...and I don't need a man to to take care.of me....

Quoting opal10161973:

The lady in question had four kids and they were all in stuff afterschool and no office job would allow her to leave at 2:30pm every day to take them all over.  That's not an excuse to her and since her family could afford for her to not work and all the costs of the activities, then why bash?  Jelly much?

Quoting Anonymous:

I work full kids are in sports and after school activities. that's just another excuse...

Quoting opal10161973:

Becasue they can?  LOL  I know many SAHM's who have kids that are in sports or other activites after school and they couldn't possibly work a job and do all of that.  Since they can afford to stay home and be there for those things, then why not?

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by Ruby Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:02 PM

Why not?? Cant a mom have time to herself ?? To go to the store, work out, do what she wants to do ?? Not all families NEED a 2 person income to live.

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:03 PM

I've found that it's easier to be a SAHM when the children are preschool ages than later.  I provide day care so that i can be son is nearly 13 years old.  I have an effect on his life.  I'm here when he gets home from school, i'm here to see him struggle with his homework, I'm here to ask how his day was and talk to him about which teachers are cool and which ones he doesn't like and which ones don't like him, I'm here to get to know his friends and see the kinds of people he's hanging around with, I'm here to show him how to cook, how to clean, and all that jazz, I'm here to interact with him.....i'm HERE.  And I like to be here.  

I've been the career mom, I've been the working parent, and I've been the SAHM, and I feel that it's better for my son when I'm here.  that said, if I had to go back out and work outside the home, I would.  But since I'm able to budget in a way that I can provide day care and be here at home, then that's what I do.  

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:03 PM

because i can.

because i can't get to my job and back in time without needing before and after school and i want to feed my kids breakfast, help them start their day and then be there when they get home and help them with homework.

because there are tons of errands and duties that i can't afford to hire out

because i want to be able to spend time with my husband after the kids are in bed, not exhausted and cramming in erraands

by Anonymous 37 on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:03 PM
Just because my kids aren't home during the day doesn't mean my job stops. The house still needs to be cleaned, dishes need to be done and laundry to. Bills still need to be paid and groceries need to be bought. Dinner needs to be made and I like to bake or make snacks for my kids. I could use a shower and a few minutes of me time. I like to have a flexible schedule so I can be home to get my kids on and off the bus, help them with homework when they get home, sick days, vacation or holidays ect. Time for me to volunteer at their school, have some extra one on one time with dh while the boys are in school on his days off and more time to hang out with my friends and my mom.
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 7:04 PM

- To become active in the school their kid is going to ...I have no clue how working parents can be involved in school & work. Atleaste 1-2x a month I have the chance to go to the classroom & participate at the school.. Some moms are there weekly! Could not do that if I worked.

- If my kids are hubby get sick, I can still care for them & not worry about missing work..

- To get involved in the community/church.

-With all kids in school mom can do all the "busy work" like clean house, errands, bills while everyone is gone. So when hubby/kids come home it is FAMILY time.. Many moms have to go to work, then try juggle keeping a clean home while their kids need attention as well.

- Have "ME TIME" without having to have a baby sitter.. Get in shape.. Educate themself. Get a small part time/anytime job.. Pick up a hobby.. Have a hobby that brings in money (

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