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UPDATE: 2/5. Please help me see his side! I'm just way too mad to.

Posted by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 10:59 PM
  • 218 Replies

Another fun story for you all! Well, maybe bot fun per-say.

My DH coaches 10-12 year old girls basketball team. When I arrived to practice on Tuesday one of the girls approached me and asked if she and her sister could come home with us on Thusday and ride to the game with us. I said we have to talk to coach, because I have to work.

Okay so I talk to DH and he says "I'm not really comfortable with taking two 11 year old girls home without a woman there. It seems like that's just asking to cause trouble."

I say, "sorry babe I have to work. I hate to let you down."

"Well I just wish you would be home. I'm going to have to tell the girls they can't come to the game."

I offer to change my work schedule so I have thurs off and work fri, so we can help and the girls can make it to the game.

DH says "do what you think is best."

So I get to work Wednesday and ask my boss if he'd rather I come in thurs or fri, because I might want thurs off.

Boss says "actually I was going to ask you to work Friday so that works great. I'll pay you today."

So I get home and tell DH I'm off Thursday, he says and I quote "I'm really glad you are off, I think it's for the best."

Well schools end up closed thurs so it becomes a non issue, as the girls had to go to a relative's for the day and had a ride to the game.

But DH gets all mad and he's like "you go changing your schedule whenever you want and you don't care about anyone else."

"Excuse me?" I say "what was that?"

"You know they will close schools tomorrow."


"We'll now I'm going to have to miss with to watch the kids." (Dh's kids, not the ball players).

"No, we can take them to their moms. She runs a daycare out if her home. And im sure shed love to see them."


"We can take them to your mom and dad's."


"I will send them to friend's houses."


"Okay, we will ask your dad to come over ANC hang out. It will only be 2 hours."


"We need to make a plan."

"I'll figure it out."

"I'm trying to help."

"A lot of help you are, you just care about yourself. I can't leave work early!"

"Well there are tons of options. They are five and eight, have lots of friends whose parents we know really well, and they have a mom on the other side of town. We'll work it out."

"Dont talk to me."

"Please don't be that way, I changed my schedule to help you in the first place."

"You changed if because all you care about is you."

"Now that's not fair and you know it. Besides he was going to ask me to change it anyway."

"He might not have."

"Yes he would. "

"You don't know that. You just did whatever you want and don't care about anyone else."

So I got up and walked away. Obviously he isn't going to be reasonable. But I'm really hurt. He spends the rest of the day not speaking to me.

He leaves for work at 3am. And I always make him breakfast and wake him up, so while he's eating I bring up that we need a plan for the kids. Why can't they go to mom's? He just tells me no again.

So I ask "do you want me to call out?"

"I don't see why I should have to."

"I already got paid for Friday and I'm the only employee, if I don't work we have no productivity that day. That's why I prefer to know in advance."

"See all you care about us yourself."

"I'll call out if you'll forgive me."

"Just stay away from me."

"Okay well I'm sorry I let you down."

He leaves all mad and won't even hug or kiss goodbye. I try not to cry until he's out of sight. Because I don't want to give him the satisfaction.

He calls later and asks if schools are closed. I tell him they are. He gets all mad again. And tells me to call my boss. When I ask what he wants me to say, he doesn't speak. I say okay I'll call him after 7am, it's too early now (6:15). He hangs up on me.

At 7 I call my boss and he tells me I can stay home if I want, but there is a chance for extra responsibility on a trial basis (which will go away if I don't come in) and $1,000 in commission.

So I start texting my DH at 7:05 every 5 minutes telling him I have this great opportunity, I'm so excited!

Finally at 9:30am I'm already a half hour late and no word from DH I put the kids in the car and take them to work with me.

He barges into my office and takes the kids and leaves without speaking to me at 12:30 while im working my butt off to get ready for My client. Absolutely nothing from him before that.

And now he hasn't spoken a single word to me since.


Here 's the question.

Please put yourself in his shoes. What was it that I did that made him so mad?

I want to understand his side.


Okay so I just get a text from the same little girl saying "C u @ your house @ 4 or 430"

Uh, what?! I'm at work.

So I call DH and ask him if he knows about this. Yeah, well, their mom needs to send them to our house before the game. So, they're going to come over and play video games until it's time to leave for SD's game. 

UH, okay.  Well I'll be home when I can.  

DH then says, "well can't you be home by the time they get here? I don't want to be home alone with the girls."

I tell him, "No.  I'm already leaving work an hour early for SD's ball game. I can't, leave 2 hours early.  I would have had to have been out the door right now to be home before the girls got there."

"Well can't you just try?"

"No, I'm sorry. I already have appointments and stuff scheduled so I can leave at 4. I can't push it up another hour, not when it's not an actual emergency."

We'll see how mad he is when I get home.  (It's an hour drive between home and work.)

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 10:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Ruby Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:02 PM
1 mom liked this

too long, sorry...can I get the cliff notes?

by Bronze Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:03 PM
1 mom liked this
Um, honestly... absolutely nothing!!!
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by Anonymous 1 on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:03 PM
1 mom liked this
*per se
by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:03 PM
3 moms liked this
He is being irrational not you.... You just did what he asked
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by Ruby Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:05 PM
17 moms liked this

From what you have presented, you did nothing that he should be upset with at all. You changed your schedule to make him more comfortable. It sounds like he is upset about something else and taking it out on you. 

by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:05 PM
15 moms liked this
Fuck him. Hes beig a complete asshat.
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by Bronze Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:06 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm confused. Did he want you to take the day off and then you did and then the plans fell through and then he got mad at you? If that's the case, I'd be the one not speaking to him.
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:06 PM
He's being a jerk
by Bronze Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:07 PM
He sounds like my wonderful husband... when he gets mad/stressed/ about something it's always my fault and taken out on me. You did not do anything wrong that i can see!
by Silver Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 11:07 PM
1 mom liked this
Your husband sounds like an ass is there something else he's upset about? Cause otherwise he's being a bitch and kinda unreasonable
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