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Discipline

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 11 Replies
Do you make the grandparents follow your same discipline routines for your kids? Or do you allow them to have their own? If you're on the "follow your rules" side and they went against them what would you do?
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:21 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Lizardannie1966
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:22 AM

My parent's always deferred to the discipline that I and my two older sister's had for our kid's.

I and my husband plan to do the same with one exception, which our kid's understand because of how we disciplined them--want the grand-child to be spanked? Do it yourself.

Love2Cuddle
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:24 AM

Well the grandparents follow our rules. If the grandparent goes against those rules,  I will nicely tell my child to do as I told them. That will make the grandparent realize that it's our way.

KairisMama
by Ruby Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:24 AM

My parents have honestly never had to use discipline on my kids. They are very good with grandma and with grandpa. When they are over here I do ask that they follow some routine, such as lunch time, nap time, and timing video game time, etc.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:53 AM
I grew up in a non-spanking home and that's how we've been with our daughter. Time outs and getting on her level have worked wonderful for us. We rarely even use time out. Anyway my mom remarried and this guy has completely changed her views somehow and I've gotten into arguments with him about discipline. He says his rules go when my daughter is there, I said hell no. This is how extreme he is, I don't leave my daughter over there anymore unless I'm with her. One time I was tickling her and she squealed like most kids do well he raised his voice and told me if I don't hit her he will, yes he said hit. "Screaming wont be tolerated" is what he said. Well needless to say I avoided going over there for a long time but my mom wants to see her grand daughter so since of course I put my foot down. I don't want her staying over there without me but this has caused so many arguments with my mom who says her husband has changed but I don't believe it. Sorry for quick back story, on my phone lol I could type about this all day. In short my rules aren't respected and it's tearing up my relationship with my mom.


Quoting Lizardannie1966:

My parent's always deferred to the discipline that I and my two older sister's had for our kid's.

I and my husband plan to do the same with one exception, which our kid's understand because of how we disciplined them--want the grand-child to be spanked? Do it yourself.


Mamabear010
by Gold Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:56 AM
Gawd I wish I could make the grandparents displine. They will literally let any grand kid do whatever the heck they want. Drives me crazy!!!
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bi-polarmommy
by Gold Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:58 AM

 on big things they need to follow my rules

on small things, they can have their own rules

big things for me are school-nite bed times, homework. chores, respect of others, ect

little things are tv, sweets, weekend bedtimes, stuff like that

melakay1981
by Platinum Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 1:00 AM

My mom and dad have very few rules at their house and I am OK with that.  They know the difference between home and grandmas.  I want them to have the same relationship I had with my grandparents.

brittany208
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 1:02 AM

I let them be grandparents and not really worry about discipline too much. But my DS is only there for an hour or two at a time and he's very, very well-behaved for them, so its not really necessary.

One time I did request that they didnt give him any junk food bc he had been naughty all morning. It about killed MIL, lol, but she did it.

Lizardannie1966
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 1:05 AM

My husband and I talked about this long ago, even before we had two adult children in the home (we have a total of three kid's). Though we currently have no grand-children, our goal as future grand-parents is to not interfere in our kid's choices for their children. As long as the kid's are not being abused or neglected, we will respect their rights as parent's to make choices for their own kid's.

Now, there are some things we won't allow in OUR home--the house itself being torn up by a rambunctious grand-child who is allowed to do this at their own home. If that's how our kid's want to allow things in their homes with their children, be my guest. But it won't wash in our home. Another is being respectful and minding their manners in our home and by this, we mean toward each other (all the grand-kids) as well as to the adults.

We raise our own children to hopefully one day grow-up to become adults themselves and if this includes having families of their own, to become responsible parent's. I cannot imagine trying to undermine my own children when it comes to what choices they'll make in the future as parent's themselves.

Quoting Anonymous:

I grew up in a non-spanking home and that's how we've been with our daughter. Time outs and getting on her level have worked wonderful for us. We rarely even use time out. Anyway my mom remarried and this guy has completely changed her views somehow and I've gotten into arguments with him about discipline. He says his rules go when my daughter is there, I said hell no. This is how extreme he is, I don't leave my daughter over there anymore unless I'm with her. One time I was tickling her and she squealed like most kids do well he raised his voice and told me if I don't hit her he will, yes he said hit. "Screaming wont be tolerated" is what he said. Well needless to say I avoided going over there for a long time but my mom wants to see her grand daughter so since of course I put my foot down. I don't want her staying over there without me but this has caused so many arguments with my mom who says her husband has changed but I don't believe it. Sorry for quick back story, on my phone lol I could type about this all day. In short my rules aren't respected and it's tearing up my relationship with my mom.


Quoting Lizardannie1966:

My parent's always deferred to the discipline that I and my two older sister's had for our kid's.

I and my husband plan to do the same with one exception, which our kid's understand because of how we disciplined them--want the grand-child to be spanked? Do it yourself.



BelleVernonGirl
by Gold Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 1:05 AM

My parents and I always saw eye to eye on discipline so it was never a problem...but my kids never were bad at my parents house anyways... 

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