For anyone who thinks I am trying to make teen pregnancy something magical and perfect I am not. I am now 19 years old and my son will be three this year, We are not on PA, FS or any type of assistance for the past 18 months. My Husband is 20 has a job that brings enough to survive comfortably, no we're not rich but we rent our home, brought our furniture even if it is second hand and a little ratty, I am doing online schooling and trying to get my GED this year, I took the last 2 years off to care of my son because I do not like daycare centers and didn't want my son away from me. I NEVER go out, I have no friends, I have no life outside my family because I gave it all up! I love him, I love my DH, honestly I love my life and once again for that I am judged because I am PROUD OF HOW FAR WE HAVE CAME SINCE THAT DAY I MADE THE CHOICE FOR THIS TO BE OUR LIFE I am not proud of being pregnant at 16.
This is my story from my heart. Pregnant at 15 and a mom at 16.
A TOTAL DISGRACE
I want a car,
Get out of this place,
Tired of being seen as a disgrace,
16 years young I became a mom,
but to me its the best thing I have ever done.
I love what I have created that baby I hold everyday,
Of course I have had to change my teenage ways,
What I hate the most is my decisions are seen as mistakes,
People say hes taken my childhood and I have taken his faith.
He'll grow up in a broken home they say,
While I will be a welfare mom until my last days,
What people don't realise is I walked out that day,
I was going to pretend this never happened,
Have it all cleared away,
None of you would have known he even had existed,
That he was even here,
But seeing that black and white picture gave me tears,
I held my breath and shook my head,
I told me them to let me off the bed,
I held my moms hand and asked her to take me home,
I didnt want this, I guess she heard it in my tone,
I knew there was a reason that nurse turned the screen,
She knew one day I would dream,
Of the child I gave up, The one I thought I couldnt raise,
Even now the stares, words, the judgement put me in a daze,
I wonder what people would think of me if I had gone through with it,
If they had never seen his face?
I wonder if I would still be the family disgrace?
The family judges me, puts me down,
My mom stand by me and never frowns!
I hold my head high but inside I'm drowning in emotional rain,
They put me in the same catagory as people with an addiction,
I dont deserve a crucifixion,
I am not dirty nor am I a whore,
I didnt spread my legs like an open door,
I didnt make a mistake, I made a life,
My son doesnt deserve the judgement nor do I.
I had a baby young,
I left my childhood behind me,
I was not robbed of a life,
I gave it away,
I gave it up for a beautiful baby,
And for that I am thankful everyday.