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Planned our vacation now SKs can't go

Posted by Anonymous
  • 38 Replies



Question: What do you think?


Your plan sounds right

No, cancel and only go for the 2 days when the step kids can go


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Total Votes: 61

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I wanted to plan our vacation for May. I asked DH if he could get his kids during the week I wanted to go. He asked their mom and she said yes (he gets half of spring break and they just decide between the two of them who gets which half). I booked the vacation and put in my time off at work, as did DH. Now their mom called and said she needs the first half (the half she said we could have) because her sister is getting married out of time and she wants to take them to the wedding. They want to go to the wedding so we are all in agreement that they should go. My thing is what now? I think we should just go on the vacation as planned. DH thinks we should change it to a time his kids can go too. His kids were really upset when they were told that the wedding was the same time as the vacation as they wanted to do both. The problem is, I can't change where I put my paid time off hours now so at this point if we changed the time, the most we could do is like a weekend trip as opposed to the week long trip we have planned. All the kids (his 2, my 2 and the 3 we have together) are very excited about the trip, we are doing a week at Disney World I don't think it's fair to our kids to cut the  trip from 7 days til 2 because the step kids WANT to go to their aunt's wedding. We only live 3 ours from Disney world so I thought maybe later in the summer, we could take all the kids for a day or something but I still think we should go forward with our week long vacation.

PS I know a lot of posts from step moms on here get bashed but please remember that my step kids are not the only children in the situation, there are 5 more. Of course if there were no other children, we would only go when my step kids can but that's not the case. So I am looking for what everyone thinks is the fairest FOR ALL INVOLVED not just my step kids.

More info:

Because the wedding is a 2 day drive, they will be gone for the wedding the whole vacation so there is no chance of them meeting up with us after the wedding.

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:14 PM
I think Disney is more important than the aunts wedding TO THE KIDS. I understand the mom wants them there, but if they go to.Disney with you, then she can get drunk and party the night away. You should mention that!
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:16 PM
You should go as planned.
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by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:17 PM
Why cant they go to the wedding and then join you a day late at disney
by Emerald Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:18 PM
1 mom liked this

if you only live 3 hours away, cant the step kids go for those 2 days while the rest of the family stays the week?  Your DH can take them home/make the transfer one day while you and the other 5 are at the park.

by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:18 PM

 Do you think their mom is doing that on purpose?? I mean, this way you all seem like the "bad people"?
I would think that the paid for trip, during the already agreed upon specified times, is much more important than an aunts wedding (maybe not to the family, but to the kids)..

by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:19 PM

Kids and weddings rarely mix. I still remember all of the baby showers and weddings and other "family crap" my mom would drag me to as a kid. Yay, being in the way at a grown up event is SO fun for kids.

I'd talk to BM and say you cannot change your days off an the vacation is set for that date. Can the children please go to Disney with you. If she says no then its on HER and she's the bad one. Still go on your trip as planned.

by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:19 PM
The trip is paid for do go. She is the one backing off the agreement. The kids don't need to go to the aunts wedding.
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM

Keep your plans and have a great time.

by Platinum Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM
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 I would go when you planned to go. Your SK and their mom both knew what the plan was, everyone was in agreement on when the vacay was, and you put in your time off request after everything had been decided. Your SK need to learn that there are times in life that are either/or situations and this is one of them. They should be able to go to their aunt's wedding if they want to but the world doesn't revolve around them and the other 5 kids shouldn't lose out on their vacation just because of the other 2 kids. Take the SK on a one day thing later in the summer and go on with your plans.

by Jamie on Feb. 2, 2013 at 3:23 PM
1 mom liked this
You should go
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